Anonymous wrote:Puh-leaze! People have been going on about "kids these days" for 40, 50 years. Probably longer. Some people are good parents, some people aren't. Sometimes, the behavior you witness is a child at its worst. Sometimes it is the normal behavior for the child. But at the end of the day, MYOB.

yeah - But back then, no one was "diagnosed." Asperger's? When I look back, I can list a handful of school mates who fit that description. Opp. Def. Disorder? Another school "chum" comes to mind. These kids went to school with me and graduated. One kid was literally an idiot savant - a social misfit who was a brilliant piano player who won a free ride to college.

So these days, now that we have a label for every behavior (LDGT anyone?) we also have strategies for handling some of these behaviors, and many of these strategies are PC, for lack of a better description.

And if you suck as a parent, guess what? There's a class to help you improve!

Basically, in this day and age, good old fashioned discipline is a no no.

Anonymous wrote:Puh-leaze! People have been going on about "kids these days" for 40, 50 years. Probably longer. Some people are good parents, some people aren't. Sometimes, the behavior you witness is a child at its worst. Sometimes it is the normal behavior for the child. But at the end of the day, MYOB.

MYOB is hard to do when they are in your house, engaging in the latest round of bad behaviour with no comment from Mom or Dad. I usually end up disciplining in my house, regardless of whose child it is, if the parents don't step up to it. "My house, my rules" with a semi-smile. My kids try to 'help' their friends out with "we're not allowed to jump on the couch" or whatever. Even if my kids were allowed to jump on our couch, I'd never let them to that at someone else's house..but, eh, I digress.

Puh-leaze! People have been going on about "kids these days" for 40, 50 years. Probably longer. Some people are good parents, some people aren't. Sometimes, the behavior you witness is a child at its worst. Sometimes it is the normal behavior for the child. But at the end of the day, MYOB.

Do people really believe that their kids are so misbehaved because of their high IQ's? Really? That's a cop out.

We need to throw that excuse, along with "spirited child," out of the window. Are some kids more difficult to civilize than others? You bet. If you get one of those kids do you get to twist it into a plus (he's smart!) or get out of dealing with it (he's spirited!)? No.

There's a reason that there are more out of control kids now than when we were growing up, and it isn't that kids are getting smarter.

I'm the mom who first posted that her son is a defiant ^$% a lot of the time, and I mentioned that he has a high IQ. The reason that I bring that up is because it's more difficult to manage him than it might otherwise be. The standard parenting, time-out, Magic 1,2,3 books are birdcage liner to us. That whole 'give them a choice of the red pants or the blue pants' thing? No. Never. I know other people reading this know exactly what I'm talking about, and I think it's very interesting that we all have boys.

That is not my cop-out. I'm not copping out at all. I have mental calluses from repetitively staying on this kid, and I'm not afraid to be tough in private AND public and embarrass us all. I do the hard work now in hopes that he's not going to be a brilliant, failure-to-launch, pot smoking gamer at 27 who wrecks my car because I won't let him live in the basement.

You hit it right on the money. Bratty kids can turn into bratty adults with social issues--and we all know some of those.

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. I have to say many of the parents who do not discipline their kids will say they want their children to be "happy". I have never met a out of control happy child or even an adult for that matter. If you don't teach your child how to behavior and what's acceptable in this world, you set them up for a lifetime of not getting it. Teachers can't deal with the kid, employers can deal with them later. It's a form of neglect in my mind.

Anonymous wrote:OP - the behaviors you pointed out don't seem to bother the parents. My mother always said that I wouldn't let my kids do things that drove me nuts. And I don't. I'm sure I let them do things that drive OTHER people nuts. And I"m sure YOUR kids do things that would drive me nuts.

To each his own.

That's just another cop out. There are plenty of behaviors we can all agree on. When we are talking about brats, we are talking about behaviors that are generally considered bad, not just everyone's personal nits.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who wants to admit that their kids are brats? I am not at that stage yet with my baby, but I can totally see a parent thinking that their kid is being "resourceful" rather than defiant or "bad" because they think it reflects badly on them. I don't know what the truth or reality is, just saying that perhaps that is why parents think their own kids aren't brats.

as can I

But unfortunately, being in denial enables bratty behavior.

Perhaps if they were at home w/o others around, the parent would have properly scolded the child, but because they were in front of several people - she did not want to make a 'scene'. She probably knew if she grabbed her child, he would burst out screaming and embarrass her even more... Just a thought.

If there is no way to correct a child's behavior in public then you have a problem, because you can't consistently discipline the child.

Your child is a braaa---aaat, nah nah nah nah nah!

No he's not!

Yes he is!

Is not!

Is so!

Well, you're stupid then!

No, you're stupid!

Your stupider!

Hmm, I think, eating popcorn, wondering why I'm reading this. I too must be stoopid.

You're not so helpful. Truly. Not so helpful.

OP - the behaviors you pointed out don't seem to bother the parents. My mother always said that I wouldn't let my kids do things that drove me nuts. And I don't. I'm sure I let them do things that drive OTHER people nuts. And I"m sure YOUR kids do things that would drive me nuts.

To each his own.

OMG! somebody told the truth and now she is going to get some!!! just read and enjoy, these moms do not want to hear this!!

Anonymous wrote:"In any case, also agree it is an excuse for parents of kids they know have discipline issues."

Maybe parents who know their kid is a kinda slow console themselves with the thought, "Well, at least he's well behaved."

Maybe slow parents never grasp the concept of how to parent and end up raising a child they believe is 'spirited genius' and not a totaly brat?

"In any case, also agree it is an excuse for parents of kids they know have discipline issues."

Maybe parents who know their kid is a kinda slow console themselves with the thought, "Well, at least he's well behaved."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who wants to admit that their kids are brats? I am not at that stage yet with my baby, but I can totally see a parent thinking that their kid is being "resourceful" rather than defiant or "bad" because they think it reflects badly on them. I don't know what the truth or reality is, just saying that perhaps that is why parents think their own kids aren't brats.

as can I

But unfortunately, being in denial enables bratty behavior.

Perhaps if they were at home w/o others around, the parent would have properly scolded the child, but because they were in front of several people - she did not want to make a 'scene'. She probably knew if she grabbed her child, he would burst out screaming and embarrass her even more... Just a thought.

Anonymous wrote:I've had people gossip to me about how somebody else's child is a brat and all I can think is Pull the plank from your own eye before complaining about the speck in somebody else's. OP, I'm sure your kids never act up, ever.

OP here. I think I've made it clear my kids do act up. The difference is I react. They get time out. Have I ever had one of my children spit on me? No. Has one of my kids ever decided it's okay to walk with his dirty feet on the kitchen countertop to get something I've told him he couldn't have? No. I have 4 kids and not a one of them has ever looked at me and told me to shut up. My kids aren't perfect,but they do respect others and they know how to behave most of the time. I've taken them out to eat and had many people come over afterwards and tell me how well behaved my kids are. We get invited to kidless friends' homes with the children. I would imagine that we wouldn't if my kids were anything like I kids I posted about.