The one you like: the big roof deck is shared space and the small balcony is private, right? No way would I take little kids to the large space with those relatively low walls.

The 2nd unit (wife’s pick) has much higher walls in the shared space plus the nice fireplace.

Finally, with Chicago weather, the roof deck isn’t usable half the year anyway, right?

The master bath is nicer in your wife’s pick. Also it looks like there’s wall space to the right of the pantry where you could add additional stand alone storage.

I’d pick the wife’s choice, number one.

Okay, I’ll admit that’s a cool deck. Is the deck on your condo that big? Is it safe? I always worry about kids falling off of them. Could a toddler squeeze through bars or throw toys off into people below?

I get that you’re both fit and active, but being fit and active has nothing to do with the safety of going up and down those stairs with children. You can’t safely carry a stroller and a kid up them. You can’t bring an entire load of groceries up in one trip, but you also can’t leave you child alone in the condo while you make return trips, so your wife would be stuck doing multiple trips carrying both a child and a couple bags. It’ll get worse when you have multiple children. And remember, your wife probably has half the strength you do.

If you want yours that badly, you’ll have to agree to take on a ton of responsibilities to relieve your wife of lugging things up and down the stairs. So you’ll have to do daycare pickups/drop offs, all the grocery shopping, most of the errands, walks with the kids, etc. Are you prepared to take on that extra load? Or would it be easier to just learn how to utilize less cabinet space?

I lived in a walk-up condo with a ton of steps with two young kids. It was not always easy but I managed. In some ways it was great because all that walking and carrying kept me in great shape. I didn't need to go the gym. We stayed in the condo until the kids were 6 and 4. One huge advantage of the private deck space is that your kids can play whenever they want. You have a place to keep their toys, tricycles, etc. The advantage of that outweighs the disadvantage of the steps

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The stairs with a child that has to be carried would be a no-go for me. If the options you posted are truly similar then I would go for your wife's pick and then explore storage options that you could place near the kitchen area to hold the small appliances and other items you feel you need the extra cabinetry for.

Anonymous wrote:If both of you wouldn't be happy in the one the other chose, you need to keep looking. You both need to be in agreement and be excited for something like a home purchase.

agree

Those are both on busy streets but good locations...

Are you sure you don't want a SFH? Many darling updated Chicago bungalows for that price or less (I live in one). I hate dealing with condo assocations.

Save yourself long term aggravation and go with her choice. If you don’t, I can guarantee you’ll never hear then end of it. Happy wife, happy life.

I was going to say go with her pick for the reasons others have said. Since you're the cook, then I think you should wait. Your choice is a no-go.

Either wait or go with her choice.

Where do you spend the majority of your awake time? For us it’s the eat-in kitchen first and master bedroom second so that’s how we prioritized.

A sizable chunk of the condo resale market is retirees who I doubt will be interested in a walk up.

The smaller kitchen has AMPLE cabinet space for the stuff you NEED. Get rid of all the crap you only use once a year or that doesn't serve multiple functions and you'll find that the smaller kitchen is just fine. Baby plus stairs = hard no.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG - after seeing both of them, I am totally Team DH. That private deck is amazing. And, yes, kitchen is much better. I like your pick a lot better for the same price.

-woman with kids who would put up with stairs

I bet you have older kids and forgot the baby/toddler years.

I have 3 kids. My youngest is now 3. I remember when we were looking at homes when we had just 2 kids, any home with stairs to the main level was a no.

When is the last time you had a double stroller at the bottom of 16 stairs? Or had a sleeping 40 pound toddler in a stroller to carry up 16 stairs?

I’m sure OP thinks carrying an infant baby seat up and down stairs is no big deal.

That’s probably fair. We lived in SF when our kids were tiny. We didn’t live in a walk-up but we lived on a g-i-a-n-t hill and had no parking spot. As we look back, those challenges seem charming. But it was challenging for sure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG - after seeing both of them, I am totally Team DH. That private deck is amazing. And, yes, kitchen is much better. I like your pick a lot better for the same price.

-woman with kids who would put up with stairs

I bet you have older kids and forgot the baby/toddler years.

I have 3 kids. My youngest is now 3. I remember when we were looking at homes when we had just 2 kids, any home with stairs to the main level was a no.

When is the last time you had a double stroller at the bottom of 16 stairs? Or had a sleeping 40 pound toddler in a stroller to carry up 16 stairs?

I’m sure OP thinks carrying an infant baby seat up and down stairs is no big deal.

So true! He said newborn so that baby probably weighs no more than 10 pounds right now. My 3 year old is tall and weighs 43 pounds. I would hate to have to carry him up 16 steps. With every single step I would be cursing my life choices.

— woman who loved living in a 2 story walk up when I was single!!!

Op I actually used to live 5 blocks south of the Damen one in a second story walk up. It was not an issue before kids although was kind of annoying when you had groceries and it was snowing or freezing. I now have 2 kids and live in a big SFH. We buy a lot of groceries. It would absolutely suuuuuck if I was dragging groceries for all 4 of us up two flights of stairs. Also, you have no idea how much stuff / how many times you run back to grab something when trying to get out the door with kids. Especially more than 1 kid. Your newborn now is easy because you can plop him in the carrier and he can’t leave. Squirmy toddlers, constantly needing to go potty, suddenly spilled water everywhere and needs to change their shirt etc. it’s annoying! I’m in good shape too, OP, but thinking about getting out of the house solo with my two toddlers sounds like a nightmare. Because I then have to buckle them in the car and leave them while I run up and grab the rest of the stuff, or I leave them alone in the condo while I load the car. Would be worried they’d fall down the stairs or wander off if I let them roam. In my cul de sac I can keep an eye on them while I load the car. There will be times when you or your wife will take the kids on solo outings and the logistics are way more than you can imagine right now.

Also...one day we will travel again, and then nightmare of packing and getting out of the house for a long trip with stairs also sounds miserable. At the end of the day, is it all doable? Sure- but painful, and your wife may be resentful.

The deck is great I Agree but you live in Chicago. It’s a few months of the year that you’ll use it. Keep looking or choose the one with the elevator