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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4 months and it was the best parenting decision we made. Babies need good quality sleep to thrive. It is cruel to let them be over tired all the time. Took 3 nights.

OP here. He was a happy baby when he was getting quality sleep 0-3 months and then it just got bad. He is always cranky and rarely happy now because he is so tired. Even when he was 0-1 and waking up every 2-3 hours to eat, he was still happy because he was getting sleep. He had such a mood change and was always happy when awake when he started sleeping 5 and then 8 hour stretches and getting good naps. Now he will cry or fuss almost all day. He will yawn and run his eyes but then he won’t sleep very long. He went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep.

We will do a gentle Ferber method with the 3, 5, 10 minute check-ins, etc.

The same thing going on during the day is also going on at night, most likely teething. What's wrong with rocking a baby to sleep for 20-30 minutes? Jesus, that's too much comfort to give your own baby?

Because it's not 20-30 minutes. I would have had NO PROBLEM rocking my baby for 20-30 minutes. But I did that, she woke up as soon as she hit the crib. Then she would wake up after 45 minutes, wash rinse repeat all night. Frankly you are a misogynist who expects women to sit and rock their babies all night long and never sleep.

Huh? Are you the PP above, who said your baby "went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep"??? That's the post I was responding to, super genius. If that's you, then why are you rewriting yourself now? And if it's not you, what are you responding for?

Because I had to SLEEP TRAIN. What would you have had me do if you were in my situation?

Well I don't know what your situation is. Are you the poster I already quoted or not?

You seem to be under the impression that people sleep train because they can't be bothered to rock their kid for 20-30 minutes to get them to sleep. This isn't why people sleep train. There was no amount of rocking or soothing that would have helped my first sleep. We tried everything. Do you think I enjoy hearing my child cry? I did it because she couldn't put herself back to sleep and was waking up every 45 minutes for months. I'm asking you, what would you have had me do? Sleep training worked and helped her sleep which is vital for brain development. You seem to have all the answers but people like you are so g-d convinced of your own moral superiority you can't even think straight. Believe me, the higher the horse the greater the fall. You don't understand other people's situations and should just zip it.

You are incoherent. I was responding to the poster who said their baby "went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep". That's either you or it's not. Which is it -- was that you or wasn't it?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, not hearing a lot of scientific evidence from the anti-CIO crowd (mattress blog non withstanding). Please tell me why you are more qualified than the medical doctors and researchers.

+1. The pp who is saying to rock your baby all night sounds the type to tell you that you have to breastfeed no matter what. You’re not a real mom if you formula feed. So tired of women like her. OP do yourself and your baby a favor and sleep train.

I'm none of those things. I'm sorry you need a strawman argument to win, and yet claim to be interested in scientific evidence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4 months and it was the best parenting decision we made. Babies need good quality sleep to thrive. It is cruel to let them be over tired all the time. Took 3 nights.

This seems really obvious to me and I don't understand how people who call CIO "cruel" can't even seem to acknowledge it. I got lucky with a very good sleeper and didn't need to sleep train, but on the few occasions she had rough nights she was a totally different baby the next day. Just miserable. Otherwise she has always been such a happy baby and kid. It just seems so clear that sleep = good. If you need to sleep train to get there, I truly can't fathom why that's considered cruel. You're helping your baby get something they physically need! The whole "you can't even be bothered to take care of your kid" narrative is such obvious bullshit peddled by people who like to feel superior however they can. If it had been necessary for us, I absolutely would have sleep trained.

There's a reason these posters resort to ad hominem attacks and never respond to the questions of:

1. Why do they know better than the medical doctors and scientific researchers?
2. What are people, like a PP, who have kids that wake up every 45 minutes supposed to do?
3. Do their kids never cry in the car seat or bathtub or at all? Do they prevent all crying?

Etc etc. Notice these posters fall silent when confronted with facts and hard questions.

Anonymous wrote:4 months and it was the best parenting decision we made. Babies need good quality sleep to thrive. It is cruel to let them be over tired all the time. Took 3 nights.

This seems really obvious to me and I don't understand how people who call CIO "cruel" can't even seem to acknowledge it. I got lucky with a very good sleeper and didn't need to sleep train, but on the few occasions she had rough nights she was a totally different baby the next day. Just miserable. Otherwise she has always been such a happy baby and kid. It just seems so clear that sleep = good. If you need to sleep train to get there, I truly can't fathom why that's considered cruel. You're helping your baby get something they physically need! The whole "you can't even be bothered to take care of your kid" narrative is such obvious bullshit peddled by people who like to feel superior however they can. If it had been necessary for us, I absolutely would have sleep trained.

I wouldn’t, OP. I think he’s just too young.

What I would work on is stopping the rocking to sleep and let him fall asleep on his own. It’s the rocking that’s screwing you up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We loosely started 12 hours by 12 weeks at 8 weeks and our 6 month old has slept through the night since 3.5 months

Some babies sleep through the nigh early (although 3.5 is pretty nuts -- probably a lie). But not all babies do. For babies who wake up at night, it's not fair to torture them with being left to scream. No, coming in and telling them you're there and then leaving again is not what they are asking for. They are asking to be fed. They need it. They have that right when they're 4 months old.

People who sleep train small babies are sickening. CIO will be looked on as barbaric in another 20 years (probably when your own kids start having kids, and you try to tell them "We did it and you turned out fine" and they will exchange a knowing look with their spouse and say, "Yeah, we've decided not to go that route but thanks for the advice."

Actually you’re right. I’m lying. He didn’t sleep through the night on the days my DH forgot to turn on the nightlight. I think he would wake up and get scared in the pitch dark. That happened about 5 times.

OP you should sleep train and ignore these nutjobs and request the thread be deleted.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We loosely started 12 hours by 12 weeks at 8 weeks and our 6 month old has slept through the night since 3.5 months

Some babies sleep through the nigh early (although 3.5 is pretty nuts -- probably a lie). But not all babies do. For babies who wake up at night, it's not fair to torture them with being left to scream. No, coming in and telling them you're there and then leaving again is not what they are asking for. They are asking to be fed. They need it. They have that right when they're 4 months old.

People who sleep train small babies are sickening. CIO will be looked on as barbaric in another 20 years (probably when your own kids start having kids, and you try to tell them "We did it and you turned out fine" and they will exchange a knowing look with their spouse and say, "Yeah, we've decided not to go that route but thanks for the advice."

You must be tired, I’m sorry. My DH, baby and I are all well-rested and baby boy is healthy, growing and learning new things everyday. I’m sorry you’re so miserable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4 months and it was the best parenting decision we made. Babies need good quality sleep to thrive. It is cruel to let them be over tired all the time. Took 3 nights.

OP here. He was a happy baby when he was getting quality sleep 0-3 months and then it just got bad. He is always cranky and rarely happy now because he is so tired. Even when he was 0-1 and waking up every 2-3 hours to eat, he was still happy because he was getting sleep. He had such a mood change and was always happy when awake when he started sleeping 5 and then 8 hour stretches and getting good naps. Now he will cry or fuss almost all day. He will yawn and run his eyes but then he won’t sleep very long. He went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep.

We will do a gentle Ferber method with the 3, 5, 10 minute check-ins, etc.

The same thing going on during the day is also going on at night, most likely teething. What's wrong with rocking a baby to sleep for 20-30 minutes? Jesus, that's too much comfort to give your own baby?

Because it's not 20-30 minutes. I would have had NO PROBLEM rocking my baby for 20-30 minutes. But I did that, she woke up as soon as she hit the crib. Then she would wake up after 45 minutes, wash rinse repeat all night. Frankly you are a misogynist who expects women to sit and rock their babies all night long and never sleep.

Huh? Are you the PP above, who said your baby "went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep"??? That's the post I was responding to, super genius. If that's you, then why are you rewriting yourself now? And if it's not you, what are you responding for?

Because I had to SLEEP TRAIN. What would you have had me do if you were in my situation?

Well I don't know what your situation is. Are you the poster I already quoted or not?

You seem to be under the impression that people sleep train because they can't be bothered to rock their kid for 20-30 minutes to get them to sleep. This isn't why people sleep train. There was no amount of rocking or soothing that would have helped my first sleep. We tried everything. Do you think I enjoy hearing my child cry? I did it because she couldn't put herself back to sleep and was waking up every 45 minutes for months. I'm asking you, what would you have had me do? Sleep training worked and helped her sleep which is vital for brain development. You seem to have all the answers but people like you are so g-d convinced of your own moral superiority you can't even think straight. Believe me, the higher the horse the greater the fall. You don't understand other people's situations and should just zip it.

Anonymous wrote:Again, not hearing a lot of scientific evidence from the anti-CIO crowd (mattress blog non withstanding). Please tell me why you are more qualified than the medical doctors and researchers.

+1. The pp who is saying to rock your baby all night sounds the type to tell you that you have to breastfeed no matter what. You’re not a real mom if you formula feed. So tired of women like her. OP do yourself and your baby a favor and sleep train.

Sleep training at four months was the best decision I made as a parent. I also had a kid that was doing... okay... with sleeping until the 4 month sleep regression hit (early for us - closer to three months) and the wheels fell completely off the wagon. After doing my research, I decided that 4 months was the earliest time that was widely acceptable by scientists. There are some folks who advocate earlier, but the science wasn't as strong, and I didn't feel good about that, so we wrestled our way through until he got to 4 months. We actually started two days early because we just could. not. take. it. and he was also miserable. Our guy was a tough nut to crack (we still had a couple bad days during week two) but it was a complete life changer.

I strongly recommend the Sleep Easy Solution if you're looking for a good guide. They recommend waking the baby for a dream feed at 4 months, which we actually still do at almost 8 months.

Just one other thing I haven't seen mentioned in the thread so far - if you sleep train early, ages 5 months until they start being mobile (8-10 months? I dunno, we're not there yet) is just such a wonderful and amazing time with a baby. We have just enjoyed him so, so much these last four months. He's sleeping, we're sleeping, and the time we're spending with him is FUN. And cuddly! And adorable! And amazing! And filled with giggles and wonder and joy and bonding. And not rocking for a million years with your arms aching and your back aching and just hating your life.

The people I know who didn't sleep train their infants where zombies by the eight month mark. I feel like they missed out on so much.

I would never do that to a baby. There are so many mean parents on this board, and posts about mean parents and mean children. Be careful who you take advice from, OP. Be kind and loving to your baby -- he's only 4 months old.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4 months and it was the best parenting decision we made. Babies need good quality sleep to thrive. It is cruel to let them be over tired all the time. Took 3 nights.

OP here. He was a happy baby when he was getting quality sleep 0-3 months and then it just got bad. He is always cranky and rarely happy now because he is so tired. Even when he was 0-1 and waking up every 2-3 hours to eat, he was still happy because he was getting sleep. He had such a mood change and was always happy when awake when he started sleeping 5 and then 8 hour stretches and getting good naps. Now he will cry or fuss almost all day. He will yawn and run his eyes but then he won’t sleep very long. He went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep.

We will do a gentle Ferber method with the 3, 5, 10 minute check-ins, etc.

The same thing going on during the day is also going on at night, most likely teething. What's wrong with rocking a baby to sleep for 20-30 minutes? Jesus, that's too much comfort to give your own baby?

Because it's not 20-30 minutes. I would have had NO PROBLEM rocking my baby for 20-30 minutes. But I did that, she woke up as soon as she hit the crib. Then she would wake up after 45 minutes, wash rinse repeat all night. Frankly you are a misogynist who expects women to sit and rock their babies all night long and never sleep.

Huh? Are you the PP above, who said your baby "went from putting himself to sleep to needing to be rocked for 20-30 minutes to go to sleep"??? That's the post I was responding to, super genius. If that's you, then why are you rewriting yourself now? And if it's not you, what are you responding for?

Because I had to SLEEP TRAIN. What would you have had me do if you were in my situation?

Well I don't know what your situation is. Are you the poster I already quoted or not?

We sleep trained twins 18 weeks, 14 adjusted. Just to fall asleep on their own. We intended to keep two feedings, but within a week they were sleeping through, 7 pm-6 am. Turned out they weren’t hungry overnight, they just hadn’t had the space and time to figure out how to go back to sleep without being fed.

When we sleep trained our singleton, he continued to eat 2x overnight until 6 months, then 1x per night until 8 months. So the twins dropping their feedings on their own was a lovely surprise!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP just remember sleep training, teaching baby to fall asleep independently is not the same as night weaning. Feel free to keep feeds if you know baby needs them. Ignore posters who mix up the two and think you’ll be leaving baby to scream when hungry.

OP here. He doesn’t eat at night except for one wake up. He wakes up and can’t put himself back to sleep.

Are you trying to feed him and he isn't interested?

OP here. He wasn’t enough throughout the day to not need to eat at night. We still offer and he will get even more mad and push it away. He will take his pacifier and fall back asleep and be content if we rock him. Sometimes he will wake up every 30 minutes when the sleep cycle ends. He is not hungry or in pain. He just wants to be held and rocked or he is at happy. He needs to be fully rocked to sleep and out before we can put him back down or he will wake back up and cry unless we pick him back up and rock him to sleep.