Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op - just remember, most people judging you in this thread have already had their wedding day the way they wanted it. The people who are excited to celebrate with you will be there - no need to worry about the rest!

Your presumption is incorrect. You are equating "attendance" with "excitement". Not everyone attending OP's do-over wedding will be 'excited' and not all of those missing it will be 'un-excited'.

In reality, there's nothing exciting about a do-over ceremony. In fact, it's textbook, anti-climatic. Have a big celebration/reception if you like but having another ceremony is cringe inducing. Why even have the 1st wedding?

Anonymous wrote:We never said we were going to the court house. We’ve decided to just do the wedding ceremony and reception all on the same day in 2022. Case closed. Thank you for everyone’s ideas. Good luck to any other engaged couples!

Anonymous wrote:Op - just remember, most people judging you in this thread have already had their wedding day the way they wanted it. The people who are excited to celebrate with you will be there - no need to worry about the rest!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that asking people to go to a B&B for three dats us asking a lot. Have a party one night. Not a year after you get married.

Yeah this is a horrible idea for a wedding (but one I have heard before). Seriously OP, imagine if a cousin or friend of your husband asked you to give up an entire weekend at a B&B in a location of their choosing? Brides and grooms always think this is a great idea since, of course, it’s their wedding. But for other people it’s a pain.

NP. I agree. In the wise words of Miranda from SATC, “You get a day.”

Anonymous wrote:My fiancé and I decided to move our “big” wedding from October 2021 to October 2022. October 2021 we will do a small church ceremony with just our parents. Our reasoning is we want to completely bypass all the covid concerns when have our big celebration, we will do the “big ceremony and reception” in 2022. The big day is a “big deal” to us, we are renting a B and B for 3 days and the special times with family and friends who live scattered across the US is important to us. Tonight my brother and Dad were questioning us and asking if we thought we pushed the wedding back too far and why don’t we just do something small and save money. I’m so tired of hearing critiques about our decision, it makes me feel like we made a bad decision. But it’s our life and it’s the decision we want. I’m bummed people aren’t excited for us and just want to question our timing. Most of our wedding party thought it was a good decision. My best friend has rescheduled her wedding 3x in 2020/2021. We did not want that to be us? How do we hold on to our joy in this difficult time and with criticism?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:October ‘21 will be your wedding. Whatever you do the following year is a party, not a wedding, because you will already be married.

Ohh boo, be quiet. You know what, OP? I’m a huge traditionalist and a stickler for semantics and I was likely quite a bit judgmental in my own head when my cousin hosted a huge family wedding 1 years ago, a year after she and her husband actually got legally married at a courthouse just before he was deployed overseas. They hosted a full-on wedding ceremony with a big white dress a year later and had a huge crowd. And you know what? It was LOVELY and big and over the top and my brother died a month later and it was the last time our whole big family had a celebration together. It was another 4 years before I had my own wedding and in the meantime my aunt and uncle both died (the bride’s grandparents.)

If she had been concerned about being a stickler, she would have given in to my judgmental mom and others who thought she was tacky. Instead, she gave us all an occasion to celebrate and gather and precious, irreplaceable pictures and memories. I am so grateful for that wedding. It was beautiful and it was generous of her to celebrate with the whole extended family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:October ‘21 will be your wedding. Whatever you do the following year is a party, not a wedding, because you will already be married.

Ohh boo, be quiet. You know what, OP? I’m a huge traditionalist and a stickler for semantics and I was likely quite a bit judgmental in my own head when my cousin hosted a huge family wedding 1 years ago, a year after she and her husband actually got legally married at a courthouse just before he was deployed overseas. They hosted a full-on wedding ceremony with a big white dress a year later and had a huge crowd. And you know what? It was LOVELY and big and over the top and my brother died a month later and it was the last time our whole big family had a celebration together. It was another 4 years before I had my own wedding and in the meantime my aunt and uncle both died (the bride’s grandparents.)

If she had been concerned about being a stickler, she would have given in to my judgmental mom and others who thought she was tacky. Instead, she gave us all an occasion to celebrate and gather and precious, irreplaceable pictures and memories. I am so grateful for that wedding. It was beautiful and it was generous of her to celebrate with the whole extended family.

Anonymous wrote:October ‘21 will be your wedding. Whatever you do the following year is a party, not a wedding, because you will already be married.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that asking people to go to a B&B for three dats us asking a lot. Have a party one night. Not a year after you get married.

Yeah this is a horrible idea for a wedding (but one I have heard before). Seriously OP, imagine if a cousin or friend of your husband asked you to give up an entire weekend at a B&B in a location of their choosing? Brides and grooms always think this is a great idea since, of course, it’s their wedding. But for other people it’s a pain.

NP. I agree. In the wise words of Miranda from SATC, “You get a day.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that asking people to go to a B&B for three dats us asking a lot. Have a party one night. Not a year after you get married.

Yeah this is a horrible idea for a wedding (but one I have heard before). Seriously OP, imagine if a cousin or friend of your husband asked you to give up an entire weekend at a B&B in a location of their choosing? Brides and grooms always think this is a great idea since, of course, it’s their wedding. But for other people it’s a pain.

Anonymous wrote:October ‘21 will be your wedding. Whatever you do the following year is a party, not a wedding, because you will already be married.