Anonymous wrote:Our “marriage issue” didn’t really delay us. I shared that only because the timeline might look like we had our second to “save the marriage”, which wasn’t the case at all

My post was to say it is a bit obnoxious to assume you know what is going on in anyone’s marriage.

Some people also assumed we were one and done when we hadn’t had a second within 4 years.

Unless you know the couple well, you don’t know their plans or motivations.

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Anonymous wrote:Are we sure she actually carried the baby? Maybe they’ve adopted or something.

Maybe.

It’s a big gap for a couple pushing 40.

Not everyone wants to have 3 kids in 3.5 years. I did not.

Correct. I did it in 2.5 years and turned out great. Brothers who are best friends with lots of friends in common. One grade between them in school. Now 12 and 14.5. With quarantine it’s great they go out and shoot hoops, play soccer and have a lot of other interests.

Too big a spread (these 2 wont even be in HS together) is not for many, unless fertility or $ issues.

It's my ideal without fertility or money issues, but I am one of 2 with a 2.5 year gap and...I hated it! Annoying as all get out to have some little ass kisser/hysterical cry baby and antagonist following you around all the time.

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Anonymous wrote:She is just making sure to get the most money in child support when he divorces her.

Other way around, he'll move on. He's obviously bored.

They don't match to me. I've always thought they were odd together.

Anonymous wrote:Our “marriage issue” didn’t really delay us. I shared that only because the timeline might look like we had our second to “save the marriage”, which wasn’t the case at all

My post was to say it is a bit obnoxious to assume you know what is going on in anyone’s marriage.

Some people also assumed we were one and done when we hadn’t had a second within 4 years.

Unless you know the couple well, you don’t know their plans or motivations.

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Anonymous wrote:Gross so he was getting cozy with someone else while she was pregnant?

Nope. Math says Jessica rushed to get pregnant when the affair broke.

Bandaid baby

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Anonymous wrote:I am completely open about my reasons for our VERY large age gap (8+ years), but I do find it annoying that people immediately assume something is wrong when someone doesn't conform to the 2-3 year age gap norm

I had health issues with my first pregnancy in my late 20s, my husband was in school, our first was a handful, I switched from FT work to PT work, we didn't want to pay for 2 in daycare. We waited 4 years to TTC by choice.

THEN we got surprised by unexplained secondary infertility. Weren't completely sold on spending a damn fortune on/putting my already messed up body through treatments. So, just kept trying for a while. After about 2 years, finally decided to try IUI and nothing else. Did get pregnant on the second cycle - had a miscarriage. That was devastating.

THEN came a major marriage crisis after we had completed our first IUI round (3 cycles total) - it was really hard for a month or so. We were just starting to talk again and had decided not to split/divorce....bam, pregnant without treatments. It wasn't a save the marriage baby, though, as some might have thought (although few knew our marriage was in crisis to begin with - I didn't share with many people what was happening).

I share all this because you never know what is actually going on with a couple/family. I mean, MAYBE what you're saying is right - but maybe this is what they planned, too.

So you had both fertility issues and marriage issues which delayed having another baby? Um, that’s exactly what I suspected with J+J...because it’s not typical for a woman who is pushing 40 to delay just for fun.

Anonymous wrote:I am completely open about my reasons for our VERY large age gap (8+ years), but I do find it annoying that people immediately assume something is wrong when someone doesn't conform to the 2-3 year age gap norm

I had health issues with my first pregnancy in my late 20s, my husband was in school, our first was a handful, I switched from FT work to PT work, we didn't want to pay for 2 in daycare. We waited 4 years to TTC by choice.

THEN we got surprised by unexplained secondary infertility. Weren't completely sold on spending a damn fortune on/putting my already messed up body through treatments. So, just kept trying for a while. After about 2 years, finally decided to try IUI and nothing else. Did get pregnant on the second cycle - had a miscarriage. That was devastating.

THEN came a major marriage crisis after we had completed our first IUI round (3 cycles total) - it was really hard for a month or so. We were just starting to talk again and had decided not to split/divorce....bam, pregnant without treatments. It wasn't a save the marriage baby, though, as some might have thought (although few knew our marriage was in crisis to begin with - I didn't share with many people what was happening).

I share all this because you never know what is actually going on with a couple/family. I mean, MAYBE what you're saying is right - but maybe this is what they planned, too.

Anonymous wrote:What on earth I thought they were getting divorxed

Anonymous wrote:What on earth I thought they were getting divorxed

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Anonymous wrote:Her 7th heaven costar gave birth as well

I saw that. So happy for both of them and for little Silas to have a playmate.

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Anonymous wrote:She is just making sure to get the most money in child support when he divorces her.

Other way around, he'll move on. He's obviously bored.