Anonymous wrote:OP - stop making it about you

Stop with "your feelings". Stop.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your brother is selfish, and none of that sounds fun (dancing boxes?). Masks with holes in them will not work. And one can get married in a church without a huge reception.

I’m sorry your parents aren’t listening to reason. I hope you can get them to change their minds about participating.

OP here- of course I’m one of the only ones in healthcare but my dad in particular is not concerned about the risk. It is SO stressful and I would never forgive my brother if something happened to my parents.

Anonymous wrote:My family just informed a close friend that we will not attend her wedding this weekend. We had RSVP'ed to come to the outdoor ceremony, but not the reception, because we didn't feel it would be safe inside a ballroom for hours. We found out guests will be seated close together as at a normal pre-pandemic wedding for the ceremony and decided to bow out. I'm pretty sad about this and worried we will be the only ones who don't go and the couple will think we don't care about their friendship, which we really really do. This is just how superspreader events are happening in ither countries where they are controlling it better than here.

It really, really sucks, but i think couples who get married mid-pandemic need to look at people not coming as a health decision and NOT a reflection of how much they care about the relationship. So yeah...i might skip my brother's wedding. Fortunately, the one family wedding scheduled for this summer was canceled and the couple had a lovely little park elopement, which I think was a thoughtful and loving decision by them.

Anonymous wrote:My family just informed a close friend that we will not attend her wedding this weekend. We had RSVP'ed to come to the outdoor ceremony, but not the reception, because we didn't feel it would be safe inside a ballroom for hours. We found out guests will be seated close together as at a normal pre-pandemic wedding for the ceremony and decided to bow out. I'm pretty sad about this and worried we will be the only ones who don't go and the couple will think we don't care about their friendship, which we really really do. This is just how superspreader events are happening in ither countries where they are controlling it better than here.

It really, really sucks, but i think couples who get married mid-pandemic need to look at people not coming as a health decision and NOT a reflection of how much they care about the relationship. So yeah...i might skip my brother's wedding. Fortunately, the one family wedding scheduled for this summer was canceled and the couple had a lovely little park elopement, which I think was a thoughtful and loving decision by them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People have the right to make their own decisions. If you dont feel safe, you dont have to go. If your parents want to go because he is their son and they think it is worth the small risk, they can go.

Its one of the things I hate about all of this. We are acting like the elderly are like pets we have to protect. Im sure your parents are smart people who understand the choice they are making. Believe it or not, for some, seeing their son get married might just be worth taking this risk. Im sure they know nobody would blame them if they responded that they were not able to go and would i stead have a zoom call later that night in celebration, but I bet for them they think its worth it to be there in person. You need to support them on this.

Just stop it. Public health is not about individual choice. That's not how it works. This is irresponsible at every level, including the VA government that is allowing this gathering to happen. It could affect OP, her family, and everyone they come in contact with...which may well be many posters on this forum.

It's truly maddening, because this "let individuals make their own choices" mentality is why we're in this mess in the first place. There are some decisions that have to be made collectively, and that's the reason we have an elected government...so people have a say in who gets to make collective decisions.

Anonymous wrote:People have the right to make their own decisions. If you dont feel safe, you dont have to go. If your parents want to go because he is their son and they think it is worth the small risk, they can go.

Its one of the things I hate about all of this. We are acting like the elderly are like pets we have to protect. Im sure your parents are smart people who understand the choice they are making. Believe it or not, for some, seeing their son get married might just be worth taking this risk. Im sure they know nobody would blame them if they responded that they were not able to go and would i stead have a zoom call later that night in celebration, but I bet for them they think its worth it to be there in person. You need to support them on this.

Anonymous wrote:We need as a society to move away from the demand that a wedding reception be held IMMEDIATELY after the wedding.

Rather, instead, the $$$ and effort should be exerted on either a baby shower or a first anniversary party, or at least make it a perfectly cromulent choice as opposed to the weird looks such a thing would get today.

Reduce the stress on the bride and groom. Let them deal with the stress of beginning a new life together and work through the most obvious issue.

As to OP ...

If the bride's family needs a ceremony performed by a 38th degree SuperMason, that's fine. Does her religion demand that dozens of people show up (from out of area? out of the country?) on the very same day as the wedding, or can the reception/party be held later?

If you're from FL or one of the new hotness states in spreading the virus, ask your parents or your brother if they'd pay for a seven day quarantine (or quarantine at your home for seven days).

Also realize that the hot spots of September may be an entirely different, seemingly random, set of states. Florida might be ruled by warlords swearing allegiance to The Mouse. Texas and Georgia might have it under control, but Washington State and Oregon will be under the worst ravages of any state yet. So this wedding may not happen in the way your brother thinks it will happen.

Anonymous wrote:In DC area. 200 people invited. Wedding inside a hotel ballroom. They have said already 100 people have said they will come. They are having special masks made for the happy hour that have a straw hole in them. But, no masks for dinner obviously? “Dancing boxes” with only one couple per box.
My 75 year old father is insistent on going and taking part in all activities. 70 year old mother undecided. Brother says he needs “closure on his engagement” and that a church wedding is a supposed requirement for his brides family. All of brides family is coming.
Am I nuts to be annoyed? I am in one of the states with high rise of cases, in high rise profession. I hate my parents are being put in this position. It’s causing serious familial drama and stress.