There are a lot of moms and dads that weren't and aren't great parents. I do think these celebratory hallmark days put a ton of pressure on children, including adult children to celebrate moms and dads who were barely adequate or even worse abusive or neglectful or absent or disconnected or overbearing or narcissistic or just not good parents.

Sorry OP. it's a hard day for lots of people.

I love it as a mom. We usually go out to an elegant dinner, the kids get all dressed up and behave at the table (for once!) and I get champagne and a rose with my meal. It's lovely - sad that won't be the tradition this year.

Anonymous wrote:Every day of my life since my kids have been born has been like Mother's Day. Every day of my life since I have been married has been like Valentine's Day. I am lucky to have amazing kids and an amazing husband. I am not on social media so I don't care what others do and don't have the need to show what I do.

We are a very low key family so things like eating out, buying what we want. these things happen in a routine sort of way and so we may do it on those days as well. I get a kiss and a hug for all celebrations. If kids or DH want to give me something more - flowers or gifts - that's very cute, but certainly not required.

Barf 🤮

I love it. All I want any year is a good breakfast pastry, OJ and a cup of good coffee. Enjoying those with my family is a wonderful day to start the day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I resented Mother's day for years because I was in the trenches with young kids but my MIL and my mom both expected to have a fuss made about them. This particularly rankled because my mom has been acting like a child for the last 25 years. My mom actually mothered me well for about 25 years but is has now been the same amount of time that I have been assuming various care taking duties. My spouse is not good at getting the kids to do anything for me and it's just easier if I don't have any expectations that something nice will be done. I just use it as a sort of mental permission slip to do something nice for myself later like book a massage and not feel guilty about the money.

Pretty much this. I have a good husband but he sucks at occasions. Always has. I’ll keep him but it’s hard on these days to see the husbands that go all out.

+100 I've learned to have zero expectations, and I'll treat myself somehow. Although during this quarantine, I'm not quite sure what I'll do!

Every day of my life since my kids have been born has been like Mother's Day. Every day of my life since I have been married has been like Valentine's Day. I am lucky to have amazing kids and an amazing husband. I am not on social media so I don't care what others do and don't have the need to show what I do.

We are a very low key family so things like eating out, buying what we want. these things happen in a routine sort of way and so we may do it on those days as well. I get a kiss and a hug for all celebrations. If kids or DH want to give me something more - flowers or gifts - that's very cute, but certainly not required.

I dislike it but I don’t hate it either. What I don’t like is when MIL or my mom plan a whole day based on what they would like to do, when I am the mom in the thick of it and should have a chance to do what I’d like. With social distancing, we’re going to get takeout from one of my favorite places (not a place the kids want as usual) and think I may actually like Mother’s Day for the first time!

I'm not that into it. My birthday is a couple weeks before so it feels a bit repetitive. I also found it more awkward since I became a Mom. My Mom still expects it to be all about her and I get resentful that I don't get to do what I want to do. One good thing with corona virus is that I get to spend the say just with DH and my kids. I really like brunch and DH and my kids are more cereal people so I'm just hoping we can order in a nice decadent brunch with pastries and eggs benedict!

Mother’s Day and Fathers Day are both stupid. Never liked either. Can’t wait for all the sappy tribute posts on FB! And the overachieving families who get all dressed up just to take pictures of themselves even though there’s nowhere to go!

I hate it.

When guys/kids/spouses do the dishes or cook or clean or something because "It's Mothers Day!" all they are doing is pointing out that they don't do anything to help the other 364 days of the year.

Restaurants are crowded with families and little kids and stressed out moms. No thanks.

The "you pick an activity and we will do...whatever YOU want to do" is crazy pressure because if you pick something nobody else wants to do (or even one kid doesn't want to do) you know there will be sighing or eye rolling or whining and then you feel responsible because you made them all do somewhere they don't want to be. The "pretend to enjoy this activity because mom likes it" thing is horrible.

If you just want to be left the hell alone for the day, you're a bad mom that doesn't appreciate your family.

The entire thing needs to be canceled.

I like it for my mom but not me.

Although it is one of the few days/year we order in.

Anonymous wrote:I hate it and would much rather have it not exist at all. I spend the whole lead up to the day being anxious about doing something adequate from my mom and stepmom (both of whom will get touchy if I don't strike the right note). And I also get anxious that DH will do nothing. I have a great DH who loves me and is fantastic 99.9% of the time. But it sucks when people ask what people are doing for you for mothers day and you have to say nothing. So I tell him, do something so I don't have to say that. So it is just a lot of people checking boxes unenthusiastically and another set of people having to accept overtures graciously kind of knowing that they are being given unenthusiastically.

Treat people good all the time and you don't need a performative holiday.

This.