Anonymous
Post 04/23/2020 10:44     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The scattered and disorganized piece makes me wonder if St. Anselm's Abbey would be a good choice. The boys who have gone there from our coed K-8 have tended to be bright and friendly, but with some organizational challenges that are partially just...being a teen boy.

I know you are getting him evaluated for ADHD so don't want to put this all down to sex/gender but from what I've heard, their single sex model focused on how boys in particular learn is a good fit for the kind of kid you describe.


I thought St Anselms was for incredibly smart boys?


St. Anselm’s is for incredibly diligent, dedicated, and focused kids. However, it is imported to understand that isn’t the same as “smart kids.”


Troll fail.
Anonymous
Post 04/22/2020 23:14     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The scattered and disorganized piece makes me wonder if St. Anselm's Abbey would be a good choice. The boys who have gone there from our coed K-8 have tended to be bright and friendly, but with some organizational challenges that are partially just...being a teen boy.

I know you are getting him evaluated for ADHD so don't want to put this all down to sex/gender but from what I've heard, their single sex model focused on how boys in particular learn is a good fit for the kind of kid you describe.


I thought St Anselms was for incredibly smart boys?


St. Anselm’s is for incredibly diligent, dedicated, and focused kids. However, it is imported to understand that isn’t the same as “smart kids.”
Anonymous
Post 04/22/2020 12:01     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The scattered and disorganized piece makes me wonder if St. Anselm's Abbey would be a good choice. The boys who have gone there from our coed K-8 have tended to be bright and friendly, but with some organizational challenges that are partially just...being a teen boy.

I know you are getting him evaluated for ADHD so don't want to put this all down to sex/gender but from what I've heard, their single sex model focused on how boys in particular learn is a good fit for the kind of kid you describe.


I thought St Anselms was for incredibly smart boys?


There are plenty of incredibly smart boys with executive function skills that are slow to mature.


Absolutely, but St. Anselm's looks for kids who demonstrate their intelligence academically.

I'm OP, and I've been pretty up front that my kid's strengths aren't academic. It's in my OP, and I've brought it up several other times, because it plays a big role in school choice. It's quite possible that my kid's anxiety or ADHD (if he has that) would be well addressed at St. Anselm's, but academically he's not a match.

I think that might be where PP is coming from. I didn't take offense, and had basically said the same thing when St. Anselm's was suggested earlier. It's a great school, and I have a great kid, but they aren't made for each other.
Anonymous
Post 04/22/2020 09:29     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The scattered and disorganized piece makes me wonder if St. Anselm's Abbey would be a good choice. The boys who have gone there from our coed K-8 have tended to be bright and friendly, but with some organizational challenges that are partially just...being a teen boy.

I know you are getting him evaluated for ADHD so don't want to put this all down to sex/gender but from what I've heard, their single sex model focused on how boys in particular learn is a good fit for the kind of kid you describe.


I thought St Anselms was for incredibly smart boys?


There are plenty of incredibly smart boys with executive function skills that are slow to mature.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 20:37     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Landon way better than st Andrews


OP here,

These kind of posts don't help me. I'm not looking for the "best" school. I'm looking for the school that's the right fit for my child. If you can tell me a little bit about Landon and why you think it's the right fit, I'd appreciate it. If you know something about St. A's that makes you feel it wouldn't be a fit, that would be great too.

But I'm not sure what to do with the information above.



We just went through this and will tell you - 1. st Anselm’s is very academically challenging and there didn’t seem to be anything in place for ADHD help. Plus it’s single sex. SJC seems to have a robust program to help ADHD kids and they focus on executive functioning which sounds like something your so. And my child need! Good luck!!


OP here,

Sorry, I meant St. Andrew's. St. Anselm's, wonderful school that might be a good fit for his younger brother, but not for this kid.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 19:31     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:The scattered and disorganized piece makes me wonder if St. Anselm's Abbey would be a good choice. The boys who have gone there from our coed K-8 have tended to be bright and friendly, but with some organizational challenges that are partially just...being a teen boy.

I know you are getting him evaluated for ADHD so don't want to put this all down to sex/gender but from what I've heard, their single sex model focused on how boys in particular learn is a good fit for the kind of kid you describe.


I thought St Anselms was for incredibly smart boys?
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 19:26     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Landon way better than st Andrews


OP here,

These kind of posts don't help me. I'm not looking for the "best" school. I'm looking for the school that's the right fit for my child. If you can tell me a little bit about Landon and why you think it's the right fit, I'd appreciate it. If you know something about St. A's that makes you feel it wouldn't be a fit, that would be great too.

But I'm not sure what to do with the information above.



We just went through this and will tell you - 1. st Anselm’s is very academically challenging and there didn’t seem to be anything in place for ADHD help. Plus it’s single sex. SJC seems to have a robust program to help ADHD kids and they focus on executive functioning which sounds like something your so. And my child need! Good luck!!
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 18:06     Subject: Re:What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think you should also consider public. Public allows more differentiation in classes -he could take appropriate level academics and pick and choose his sports and do music during the day. What HS are you zoned for?


Yeah, public is definitely on our list. We're in the DCC, and there's a lot to like about our local options. I think given his love of music, either Einstein or Northwood would be the right fit for him. We're zoned for one of those two, and could apply to the other.

My hesitation with public, is my concern that he's one of those kids who does well enough that he wouldn't qualify for services, but would find the executive functioning demands overwhelming. So, I want to make sure that we're looking at all options.


OP here,

I want to add that the reason I'm not asking about public schools here, is

a) This is the private school forum. If I had public school questions, I'd ask them in the MD forum,

b) I don't have questions to ask here because these are my neighborhood schools, so I have neighbors to ask. Believe me I have! (I'm not really asking about the Catholic schools here either for basically the same reason. I know people with kids at all of them)

c) I think that if he goes public, our local public is a good fit. I have concerns about size, and about some of what I hear and see in how they handle kids on 504 plans. But I'd have those concerns at any MCPS high school.

But given that he's done really well in a small setting for K-8. I want to at least look at some smaller options.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 17:10     Subject: Re:What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:I think you should also consider public. Public allows more differentiation in classes -he could take appropriate level academics and pick and choose his sports and do music during the day. What HS are you zoned for?


Yeah, public is definitely on our list. We're in the DCC, and there's a lot to like about our local options. I think given his love of music, either Einstein or Northwood would be the right fit for him. We're zoned for one of those two, and could apply to the other.

My hesitation with public, is my concern that he's one of those kids who does well enough that he wouldn't qualify for services, but would find the executive functioning demands overwhelming. So, I want to make sure that we're looking at all options.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 17:05     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What about Potomac? Yes, its very rigorous academically but your son sonds like a great fit in every other way.


OP here,

I don't know a lot about Potomac. My impression of the school is that it's academically similar to some schools I do know kids at, such as Sidwell and GDS. If that's accurate, then I don't think it would be a fit for my kid. I think that his self esteem is going to be dependent on being able to keep up academically, and also to do the things he does well, like sports and music. I can't imagine that working with that level of workload.

How different is the workload and rigor of the schools on my list?


I agree with you that Potomac is probably not a great fit.

OP - one thing to keep in mind with athletics will not just be whether they are "offered" - but how much they are "required". Schools with heavy athletics requirements can add a huge chunk of time to your child's day and responsibility. If your child likes to have downtime, be sure that the school allows for sports requirements to be met with a smaller commitment option. Suppose he plays on a team for two seasons (or even just 1) - in the off season, it helps if he can take a lighter load PE class that meets a few times a week or for 45-60 min a day if it's still 5x a week - these are more manageable than a longer practice 5x a week plus games. I know some kids who chose schools (and liked sports) but underestimated how much time it takes to be on a team for 3 seasons. My son goes to a school where there is an option to take a PE class a few times a week and he really appreciates the time he gets back in his off season trimester (He goes to a higher pressure school). Note that none of that will be an issue for public, where he will not be required to play on a sports team.





OP here,

I have a kid who "needs" sports. He needs them to manage his anxiety, to help him regulate himself, to boost his self esteem. I think that if the workload at a school was such that he couldn't manage it and a sport each season, it would mean that it was the wrong school.



Pick a good fit for a school. You can always do outside sports.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 16:26     Subject: Re:What schools would you look at for this kid?
I think you should also consider public. Public allows more differentiation in classes -he could take appropriate level academics and pick and choose his sports and do music during the day. What HS are you zoned for?
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 15:24     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:OP - reinforcing what’s already been said. Your list of SSFS, SAES, and Burke is excellent, especially if you already know them to be equally convenient to you. All are respected schools but each has a different vibe, demographic, and fit. Explore them all - for your son and family....good luck!


Agree. Bullis might also be an option.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 15:08     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
OP - reinforcing what’s already been said. Your list of SSFS, SAES, and Burke is excellent, especially if you already know them to be equally convenient to you. All are respected schools but each has a different vibe, demographic, and fit. Explore them all - for your son and family....good luck!
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 14:40     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What about Potomac? Yes, its very rigorous academically but your son sonds like a great fit in every other way.


OP here,

I don't know a lot about Potomac. My impression of the school is that it's academically similar to some schools I do know kids at, such as Sidwell and GDS. If that's accurate, then I don't think it would be a fit for my kid. I think that his self esteem is going to be dependent on being able to keep up academically, and also to do the things he does well, like sports and music. I can't imagine that working with that level of workload.

How different is the workload and rigor of the schools on my list?


I agree with you that Potomac is probably not a great fit.

OP - one thing to keep in mind with athletics will not just be whether they are "offered" - but how much they are "required". Schools with heavy athletics requirements can add a huge chunk of time to your child's day and responsibility. If your child likes to have downtime, be sure that the school allows for sports requirements to be met with a smaller commitment option. Suppose he plays on a team for two seasons (or even just 1) - in the off season, it helps if he can take a lighter load PE class that meets a few times a week or for 45-60 min a day if it's still 5x a week - these are more manageable than a longer practice 5x a week plus games. I know some kids who chose schools (and liked sports) but underestimated how much time it takes to be on a team for 3 seasons. My son goes to a school where there is an option to take a PE class a few times a week and he really appreciates the time he gets back in his off season trimester (He goes to a higher pressure school). Note that none of that will be an issue for public, where he will not be required to play on a sports team.





OP here,

I have a kid who "needs" sports. He needs them to manage his anxiety, to help him regulate himself, to boost his self esteem. I think that if the workload at a school was such that he couldn't manage it and a sport each season, it would mean that it was the wrong school.



I'm the PP. I guess that's the reason why I expounded. I would put Potomac into that category....workload plus sports will be hard. I know others have mentioned Landon sports can be a lot....but I am less familiar with the workload there - and it probably depends on which courseload he chooses to take. My guess is that there is an academic track there that would allow him to balance work with sports. But you did say all boys wasn't appealing, so maybe this isn't helpful .

I agree with others on St Andrews, Good Council. I don't know anyone personally at St Johns - but also seems like it has the sports and the ability to choose a courseload that is manageable. I also think Sandy Spring is a nice school, but perhaps your son will not get what he wants in the sports category.

I guess one question to consider is whether he's ok with merely the presence of sports teams versus the athletic strength of his teammates. (For my kids, this second part doesn't matter, but I know from being on rec teams outside of school that there are plenty of kids that get frustrated when their teammates aren't as passionate...and this often translates to skilled - and they move on to more competitive programs)


I think he's the opposite. He wants playing time. I think that if his choices were between a smaller school where he was on the field or the court for a significant amount of time every game, vs. a bigger school where maybe the team was better, and they went to the championships, but he was on the bench? I think he'd pick the former.

He's not a kid who is going to be recruited for college. He's a solid athlete, and he gets a lot out of sports, but he's not at that level. I think he'd choose playing time over prestige.
Anonymous
Post 04/21/2020 13:23     Subject: What schools would you look at for this kid?
I think you have a very good list started, I will just add don't rule out a single sex school, have him visit if he's willing.

We just finished this process and in the end DC had a very hard time deciding between two schools and the fact that one was single sex wasn't a factor after seeing what the school had to offer.

We're very excited for St. Andrew's!