Anonymous
03/22/2020 03:16
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Rockville MD: MCPS spokesperson Derek Turner today blamed inadequate funding for students not being able to read Pearson’s latest Curriculum 3.0 handouts the county adopted after asteroid hit the county on Wednesday. “Look these things can happen. We were going to go with Discovery Education’s package because quite frankly they needed our curricular development expertise more -- and they were offering us a nice consulting side gigs for all of us in the c-suite — but we’re public servants making nearly 300,000 a year already. Why get greedy in this time of need?” He added, “Kirwan passed the other night so the budget for us should hold even with only 15 perfectly diverse students left in the system.” Dr. Smith was unavailable for comment.
Anonymous
03/21/2020 23:47
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.
If Montgomery County were flattened by an asteroid, people on DCUM would find a way to blame MCPS for it.
"MCPS is too large! There's no reason my kid should have to stay home just because Silver Spring is a smoldering crater! They should break what's left of the county into township districts like New Jersey!"
"This happened because TPMS was dumbed down in the name of equity! I heard that the 7th grade tried to predict the path of the asteroid but the students messed up the math and thought it would hit Harford County!"
"My child could have helped avert this disaster but his education was ruined by Curriculum 2.0 and instead of getting into MIT like he should have, he only got into College Park and didn't get the NASA internship!"
"If they hadn't been wasting all their time on redistricting, they could have been developing distance learning plans for the 37 students left alive!"
"This is why we left for private school! Only half of Holton collapsed, and my child's college counselor is still in there writing recommendation letters!"
"The inevitable result of this restorative justice crap. Kids learn that there are never any negative consequences, so they think they can destroy the whole county with an enormous asteroid. I heard it was all arranged by some football players at Kennedy HS."
"MCPS will do anything in the name of closing the achievement gap. This is ridiculous. I guess they decided that turning all 200 schools into heaps of rubble was better than opening up more CES and magnet programs."
I'm the asteroid PP, and this is a thing of beauty. A thousand thank yous to the person who wrote it.
You're welcome! So many tropes to choose from. . .glad it provided some amusement.
Anonymous
03/20/2020 22:18
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.
If Montgomery County were flattened by an asteroid, people on DCUM would find a way to blame MCPS for it.
"MCPS is too large! There's no reason my kid should have to stay home just because Silver Spring is a smoldering crater! They should break what's left of the county into township districts like New Jersey!"
"This happened because TPMS was dumbed down in the name of equity! I heard that the 7th grade tried to predict the path of the asteroid but the students messed up the math and thought it would hit Harford County!"
"My child could have helped avert this disaster but his education was ruined by Curriculum 2.0 and instead of getting into MIT like he should have, he only got into College Park and didn't get the NASA internship!"
"If they hadn't been wasting all their time on redistricting, they could have been developing distance learning plans for the 37 students left alive!"
"This is why we left for private school! Only half of Holton collapsed, and my child's college counselor is still in there writing recommendation letters!"
"The inevitable result of this restorative justice crap. Kids learn that there are never any negative consequences, so they think they can destroy the whole county with an enormous asteroid. I heard it was all arranged by some football players at Kennedy HS."
"MCPS will do anything in the name of closing the achievement gap. This is ridiculous. I guess they decided that turning all 200 schools into heaps of rubble was better than opening up more CES and magnet programs."
I'm the asteroid PP, and this is a thing of beauty. A thousand thank yous to the person who wrote it.
Anonymous
03/20/2020 20:27
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.
If Montgomery County were flattened by an asteroid, people on DCUM would find a way to blame MCPS for it.
"MCPS is too large! There's no reason my kid should have to stay home just because Silver Spring is a smoldering crater! They should break what's left of the county into township districts like New Jersey!"
"This happened because TPMS was dumbed down in the name of equity! I heard that the 7th grade tried to predict the path of the asteroid but the students messed up the math and thought it would hit Harford County!"
"My child could have helped avert this disaster but his education was ruined by Curriculum 2.0 and instead of getting into MIT like he should have, he only got into College Park and didn't get the NASA internship!"
"If they hadn't been wasting all their time on redistricting, they could have been developing distance learning plans for the 37 students left alive!"
"This is why we left for private school! Only half of Holton collapsed, and my child's college counselor is still in there writing recommendation letters!"
"The inevitable result of this restorative justice crap. Kids learn that there are never any negative consequences, so they think they can destroy the whole county with an enormous asteroid. I heard it was all arranged by some football players at Kennedy HS."
"MCPS will do anything in the name of closing the achievement gap. This is ridiculous. I guess they decided that turning all 200 schools into heaps of rubble was better than opening up more CES and magnet programs."
Bless you, I needed this.
Anonymous
03/20/2020 15:15
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.
If Montgomery County were flattened by an asteroid, people on DCUM would find a way to blame MCPS for it.
"MCPS is too large! There's no reason my kid should have to stay home just because Silver Spring is a smoldering crater! They should break what's left of the county into township districts like New Jersey!"
"This happened because TPMS was dumbed down in the name of equity! I heard that the 7th grade tried to predict the path of the asteroid but the students messed up the math and thought it would hit Harford County!"
"My child could have helped avert this disaster but his education was ruined by Curriculum 2.0 and instead of getting into MIT like he should have, he only got into College Park and didn't get the NASA internship!"
"If they hadn't been wasting all their time on redistricting, they could have been developing distance learning plans for the 37 students left alive!"
"This is why we left for private school! Only half of Holton collapsed, and my child's college counselor is still in there writing recommendation letters!"
"The inevitable result of this restorative justice crap. Kids learn that there are never any negative consequences, so they think they can destroy the whole county with an enormous asteroid. I heard it was all arranged by some football players at Kennedy HS."
"MCPS will do anything in the name of closing the achievement gap. This is ridiculous. I guess they decided that turning all 200 schools into heaps of rubble was better than opening up more CES and magnet programs."
Anonymous
03/20/2020 14:49
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:That argument is “Idiocracy” in action. No, we don’t take everything down to the lowest common denominator. Wtf?
What do you think the end gave for "closing the achievement gap" is?
Exactly.
It is much easier to lower the bar for all kids than to get the lower-performing kids to do as well as everyone else. It’s just the way it is.
Anonymous
03/20/2020 14:42
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
Anonymous wrote:It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.
If Montgomery County were flattened by an asteroid, people on DCUM would find a way to blame MCPS for it.
Anonymous
03/20/2020 14:21
Subject: The Case for Shutting Schools Down instead of Moving Online
It's MCPS - A's for everyone and we will see you in August.