Anonymous wrote:Just have your DH take care of the kids whenever you need to attend to your hair.

+1 good compromise, but it still does nothing for the weight of all that hair.

Just have your DH take care of the kids whenever you need to attend to your hair.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A DH here. He's afraid this is step one toward the Karen-cut.

Maybe so. However, I haven't seen long hair down to the hip on any woman older than 20 that looks good. Hair that length, especially over 30, looks very much like a Duggar hairstyle. It is aging and out dated on middle aged women and never looks healthy. Hair to your shoulder blades is still long, not a "Karen" cut and will look a million times better.

I respectfully disagree. Every woman is different, hair can be anywhere from over processed to healthy. I can't understand how every single woman over 30 has Duggar hair if it's long. I know many women in their 30's, 40's and beyond who have shoulder length hair that is in great shape and looks flattering. Do you, OP.

Shoulder length is obviously fine. Bra-strap length is usually fine.

Hip length is almost always super scraggly, unstylable, and gives off Quiverfull vibes.

Anonymous wrote:My wife had some seriously impressive hair (not waist length, but below the bra strap) at various times. When she cut it to shoulder/shoulder blade length, it wasn't as striking, but it still looked pretty good. A different time when she cut it in a bob, it looked terrible. She knows I like long hair. The shoulder blade cut just felt like she was making things more manageable for herself. The bob felt like she didn't give a shit, at all, what I thought.

(I've felt like growing a beard at various times, but she really dislikes facial hair, so I shave 6 days a week because I want her to find me attractive.)

You suuuuuuck

My wife had some seriously impressive hair (not waist length, but below the bra strap) at various times. When she cut it to shoulder/shoulder blade length, it wasn't as striking, but it still looked pretty good. A different time when she cut it in a bob, it looked terrible. She knows I like long hair. The shoulder blade cut just felt like she was making things more manageable for herself. The bob felt like she didn't give a shit, at all, what I thought.

(I've felt like growing a beard at various times, but she really dislikes facial hair, so I shave 6 days a week because I want her to find me attractive.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A DH here. He's afraid this is step one toward the Karen-cut.

x a million. then the weight gain. then the wearing of sweatpants all the f'ing time, and of course, the minivan.

The minivan is fine. Frumpy hair, frumpy clothes, and the inevitable sexual disinterest that goes with those things are the problem. Remember that "it's not the nail" video that made the rounds a few years ago? "It's not the hair."

Well guess what, Dad Bod, you don't look so hot either with your receeding hair line and cargo shorts.

Pfft. I had the receding hair line and cargo shorts when she met me. Physically, I'm in better shape than during my beer swilling college days.

How old are you?

OP, standard for guys, many prefer longer hair.

I've had short hair, and I've had longer hair, and a find a couple inches below the shoulders to be easier.

If you get it cut short, at least my hair, has to be styled and also cut every six weeks. If I leave it longer, I get it cut every 3 months, and have the option of pulling it back or putting it up. So for me, longer is cheaper and more flexible, and I can let it air dry. But I can definitely see why waist length hair is difficult, and does not work with kids.

Get it cut to bra length or a couple inches below the shoulders and see what you think before wacking it all off.

OP:

You come across as very sweet and caring. You don’t need to worry about shorter hair making you less attractive.

My two cents... from a guy

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A DH here. He's afraid this is step one toward the Karen-cut.

Maybe so. However, I haven't seen long hair down to the hip on any woman older than 20 that looks good. Hair that length, especially over 30, looks very much like a Duggar hairstyle. It is aging and out dated on middle aged women and never looks healthy. Hair to your shoulder blades is still long, not a "Karen" cut and will look a million times better.

Exactly. Waist length hair isn't sexy long hair, it's like Sister Wives fundie long hair. Bra strap length is about where most people who like long hair land and that usually looks good, but longer and it looks matronly. Like a Karen cut but if Karen is FLDS.

Yes!!! Middle aged hair down to butt IS frumpy. It looks unkept and scraggly. Cut it OP

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A DH here. He's afraid this is step one toward the Karen-cut.

Maybe so. However, I haven't seen long hair down to the hip on any woman older than 20 that looks good. Hair that length, especially over 30, looks very much like a Duggar hairstyle. It is aging and out dated on middle aged women and never looks healthy. Hair to your shoulder blades is still long, not a "Karen" cut and will look a million times better.

I respectfully disagree. Every woman is different, hair can be anywhere from over processed to healthy. I can't understand how every single woman over 30 has Duggar hair if it's long. I know many women in their 30's, 40's and beyond who have shoulder length hair that is in great shape and looks flattering. Do you, OP.

I?ve had long hair most of my adult life (varying from bra-strap to waist length). I?m very lucky to have naturally thick, stick-straight, healthy hair. I recently cut mine just past shoulder-length and I hate it! Now I have to tie it back all the time to keep it out of the way. When it was longer, the weight of the hair kept it back and I could wear it loose more often. It was also much easier to do a French braid or chignon. When it was long I got compliments all the time. Now that it?s shorter, nothing. My husband hasn?t said anything (very smart man) but I know he likes it longer too. I can?t wait for it to grow back out!

I get it. Most men prefer to see you how they met you. And, I find it normal that your dh expressed how he felt OP. He doesn't want to be married to a butch or a nun ... keep it long enough to make a long ponytail. Don't listen to so many posters here who probably look asexual w/ their mom bobs.

Hip length?? That can't look good.

Anonymous wrote:Compromise. Cut it to 2" longer than shoulders. If it's even a little longer than your shoulders, it will have the visual effect of long hair rather than a long bob. See if that length is more manageable for you. If it's not, you can always cut it shorter.

You may find it easier for you mentally, too, to make a big change in stages anyway.

This.

If my DH decides to grow a full beard, I?d be bummed. It?s ok for people to have tastes. But your DH has to be reasonable, and it?ll still be plenty long. (Hair down to your hips is way too long, for my taste which I realize is irrelevant here!)