Anonymous
Post 03/09/2020 11:33     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.


THIS. A lot of people get offended by any mention of weight (up or down), so no one is going to talk about it unless YOU mention it first.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2020 10:52     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.

I guess you make a good point. Though I don?t think you can ever offend a person by telling them they look like they?ve lost weight when you know they used to be heavier.


The subtext of "You've lost weight, you look great" is " you used to be fat and ugly." No one wants to say that.


+1 I tend to not say anything unless someone brings it up and if they seem to want a compliment, I give them one. Or if I know they have been working hard I acknowledge that part of it-- "I know you've really been working at this and it shows-- congrats! Great job!!"

Because I do truly think they looked good before as well, so I try not to say "You look great!"
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2020 12:22     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
I would never comment on another woman's weight loss unless they bring it up first. Then I would say congratulations just like I would to a woman who looks pregnant but I'm damned if I'm going to ask. No way. Such are the times we are living in; people are easily offended by any comment about appearance. Other people have probably noticed, but damned if they're going to comment on it, OP.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2020 12:01     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.

I guess you make a good point. Though I don’t think you can ever offend a person by telling them they look like they’ve lost weight when you know they used to be heavier.


The subtext of "You've lost weight, you look great" is " you used to be fat and ugly." No one wants to say that.


NP +1

And even worse when you still have a way to go. Then you'll feel worse because you know that a) people used to think you looked awful, and b) people are still probably noticing the extra pounds and will be watching to see whether you lose the remaining pounds.

I'm sure you do have supporters though, they just don't want to say anything.






Not only this, but a few will be watching in anticipation to see if you regain it.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2020 11:58     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Hi op, congratulations on your weight loss! I've lost 75lbs since 2018. I went through the same experience when I first started losing. A couple of things, the bigger you are the harder it is for others to notice. So if you were 300 lbs and you went down to 270 it won't be that noticeable.

I was 214 at my highest and people started to notice at 30-35lbs mark. From there on, the compliments/comments wouldn't stop. Two years later and I really am tired of the comments, honestly.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 18:27     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:OP, how about you assume that you dress well. You looked good, before. You look good now.

Decades ago I might have wanted people to notice. Now I don't. I don't really want to think that people are scrutinizing my looks.

Do it for yourself, Op. If loved ones don't notice, choose to believe it's a good thing, a sign they love you at any weight.


Wise words. For what it's worth OP, I applaud your weight loss. It sounds like you've worked really hard. Go, you!
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 18:09     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
OP, how about you assume that you dress well. You looked good, before. You look good now.

Decades ago I might have wanted people to notice. Now I don't. I don't really want to think that people are scrutinizing my looks.

Do it for yourself, Op. If loved ones don't notice, choose to believe it's a good thing, a sign they love you at any weight.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 17:57     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Every overweight person on the planet wants to hear, “hey have you lost weight”? Truth!
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 16:50     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:Many people don’t mention weight loss because it can be a sign of a health or personal problem. It happened to me. I complimented a colleague because she lost weight and the answer was: “Not for a good reason.”

I didn’t ask what was the reason, but I was happy to see that she is chubby again.


I did this too with a guy at work. Turns out, he'd buried his brother and gotten an unwanted divorce over the past year. He said it was due to stress.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 15:13     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
It's friggin winter for crying out loud. Come summertime when you're a little more scantily clad I'm sure folks will offer compliments.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 14:53     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
This happened to me as well. I noticed that when I was the one to bring it up — as in, referring to a new exercise regime or new diet — then people would say oh yeah, I noticed you were skinnier. They don’t want to bring it up on their own. For me it was about 20 pounds, from about a 10 to a 6.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 14:33     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:Whe people comment in weight loss you know it means they think thinner is better, that thin is good and fatter to them is bad. Not everyone shares that value that thinner is always better. Or that being thinner is something that should be congratulated. Sometimes weight loss is very unhealthy, some for the wrong reasons, the result of illness, a sign of an eating disorder etc.

You may think I look so much better but I may have loved myself with the extra 20 pounds and lost it for my own reasons not to look better to you. I can look fantastic at a few different weights.

I think it is always weird to comment on people's weight. No need to monitor if they are gaining or losing or staying the same unless they invite comment.


This is what I came to say. Commenting on someone's body is rude. If you need to compliment someone, tell them they look happy, or you like their skirt, or their haircut.
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 14:32     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
I don't mention it when you gain weight, I don't mention it when you lose weight.

The deal goes both ways.

But great work OP. Enjoy those new pants
Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 14:30     Subject: Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:Going from a size 6 to 2 would be easily noticeable. 18 to 14 maybe not as much.


I don't think that's true.

It's more like going from morbidly obese to a bit less morbidly obese where people might not notice the difference. If you doubt how different size 18 looks compared to a size 14 - google it.

Anonymous
Post 03/04/2020 14:15     Subject: Re:Nobody is noticing my weightloss?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.

I guess you make a good point. Though I don’t think you can ever offend a person by telling them they look like they’ve lost weight when you know they used to be heavier.


People lose weight because they try. They lose weight when they get cancer. They lose weight when they have family problems. They lose weight when their kids are sick. Losing weight is t always a happy occasion. First PP is right. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t.


+1

Losing weight isn't always a good thing. The most I'll say is "You look great!" but I would never comment that someone lost a lot of weight unless I knew for sure that they were actively trying to lose weight.