Anonymous wrote:I’m 50 and the one thing really making me feel down is that 50% of my fellow citizens think it’s great that a racist misogynist who espouses hate is the leader of our country. I was totally okay with having been screwed out of promotions and pay because I’m a woman, especially since I had the pleasure of raising kids. But the fact that I don’t feel like I’ll be left alone to enjoy my hard-earned money in peace when I finally do get to retire . . . well, that makes me want to rip someone’s face off.

Preach.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This article resounded for my 40's, my 50's I worried about finances more with college and eldercare costs competing.
Now entering my 60's, I am more content even though I recognize I will never be able financially to retire. The reality is as a woman married to an older spouse, I am built to work longer. He won't always be able to help lift the monetary weight for the eldercare expenses. In fact, he may need to retire in 10-15 years. So at an age that I thought I would slow down, I strategize instead about moving up.

He may need to retire at 75-85?!

It is almost impossible to retire for 30+ years after only working 45, not when our parents could feasibly live to 100 and us to 120.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 50 and the one thing really making me feel down is that 50% of my fellow citizens think it’s great that a racist misogynist who espouses hate is the leader of our country. I was totally okay with having been screwed out of promotions and pay because I’m a woman, especially since I had the pleasure of raising kids. But the fact that I don’t feel like I’ll be left alone to enjoy my hard-earned money in peace when I finally do get to retire . . . well, that makes me want to rip someone’s face off.

I completely get this.

FWIW, I'm coming to a certain peace about doing whatever TF I want because it's not like society values me anyway.

Yes! NP here, and I’m just starting to see what older women have told me about the power of invisibility. Once you go grey and get some wrinkles, people (men, really) honestly don’t even notice you! I’m 44 but I’ve stopped coloring my hair and am starting to embrace the freedom that comes from just not caring. Watch out, world!

My SIL is 72 and men follow her around the grocery store. I’m 58 and it depends on where I am - LOL.

^My cousin is 60 and every one refers to her as the "hot" mom. She has always been gorgeous and she is very fit and active. Still wears a bikini and poses next to her two daughters in it and looks really GOOD. I should note she also has a great personality and is very outgoing as well. She has no problem getting and keeping attention even now.

Anonymous wrote:This article resounded for my 40's, my 50's I worried about finances more with college and eldercare costs competing.
Now entering my 60's, I am more content even though I recognize I will never be able financially to retire. The reality is as a woman married to an older spouse, I am built to work longer. He won't always be able to help lift the monetary weight for the eldercare expenses. In fact, he may need to retire in 10-15 years. So at an age that I thought I would slow down, I strategize instead about moving up.

He may need to retire at 75-85?!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 42, I felt great! At 45, things took a sudden turn for the worse. At 48, I am miserable.

Yes, it's amazing what 6 years can do to you. 22 and 28, no different. 32 and 38... starting to notice a different. 42 and 48... holy cow... it's like a black diamond ski run (speaking of which, I can't do those anymore.. my knees ache).

I'm 49, will be 50 this year. I can't imagine how I will feel at 58. I'm hoping you just get used to the new normal, and so you feel "fine" at 58. But, man... my body can't do what it used to do at 42 anymore.

Oh, god. NP. That scares me to death. I’m 42, feel fine, not amazing but fine! Sleep good. I try to live a low stress life. But the foundation is shaky. My life at 58 is hard to imagine. I would love more friends to talk to. Not “mom friends” but strong honest female friendships.

This article resounded for my 40's, my 50's I worried about finances more with college and eldercare costs competing.
Now entering my 60's, I am more content even though I recognize I will never be able financially to retire. The reality is as a woman married to an older spouse, I am built to work longer. He won't always be able to help lift the monetary weight for the eldercare expenses. In fact, he may need to retire in 10-15 years. So at an age that I thought I would slow down, I strategize instead about moving up.

Anonymous wrote:I’m 53, and yes my 40s got really more and more difficult. I am coming out the other side now and am very thankful.

+1 and I'm 52. I haven't been this happy since I was in my 20s and felt like I could do anything.

Now I accept that certain channels are closed off to me but I don't GAF.

I have to be honest here: getting divorced in my mid-40s and clawing back from that has _really_ helped my mood. I don't advocate that women break up their marriages to see if that might just be the problem. But my xH was the decider on this issue, not me, and he unwittingly gave me a HUGE gift of peace (following several years of despair).

I'm 46 and a few months... and see things starting to change. I'm more tired, gained weight recently - short-tempered with my family and and way fed-up with work. Grateful to realize it may be a 'phase' that can pass and to not make any rash changes.

Anonymous wrote:At 42, I felt great! At 45, things took a sudden turn for the worse. At 48, I am miserable.

Yes, it's amazing what 6 years can do to you. 22 and 28, no different. 32 and 38... starting to notice a different. 42 and 48... holy cow... it's like a black diamond ski run (speaking of which, I can't do those anymore.. my knees ache).

I'm 49, will be 50 this year. I can't imagine how I will feel at 58. I'm hoping you just get used to the new normal, and so you feel "fine" at 58. But, man... my body can't do what it used to do at 42 anymore.

At 42, I felt great! At 45, things took a sudden turn for the worse. At 48, I am miserable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 50 and the one thing really making me feel down is that 50% of my fellow citizens think it’s great that a racist misogynist who espouses hate is the leader of our country. I was totally okay with having been screwed out of promotions and pay because I’m a woman, especially since I had the pleasure of raising kids. But the fact that I don’t feel like I’ll be left alone to enjoy my hard-earned money in peace when I finally do get to retire . . . well, that makes me want to rip someone’s face off.

I completely get this.

FWIW, I'm coming to a certain peace about doing whatever TF I want because it's not like society values me anyway.

Yes! NP here, and I’m just starting to see what older women have told me about the power of invisibility. Once you go grey and get some wrinkles, people (men, really) honestly don’t even notice you! I’m 44 but I’ve stopped coloring my hair and am starting to embrace the freedom that comes from just not caring. Watch out, world!

I have to say, this is very freeing. Once you get over the fact that you are no longer and will never again be the "hottest" gal in the room . . . you can move on with your life and focus on other things/not worry about the male gaze/attention. It is awesome!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 50 and the one thing really making me feel down is that 50% of my fellow citizens think it’s great that a racist misogynist who espouses hate is the leader of our country. I was totally okay with having been screwed out of promotions and pay because I’m a woman, especially since I had the pleasure of raising kids. But the fact that I don’t feel like I’ll be left alone to enjoy my hard-earned money in peace when I finally do get to retire . . . well, that makes me want to rip someone’s face off.

I completely get this.

FWIW, I'm coming to a certain peace about doing whatever TF I want because it's not like society values me anyway.

Yes! NP here, and I’m just starting to see what older women have told me about the power of invisibility. Once you go grey and get some wrinkles, people (men, really) honestly don’t even notice you! I’m 44 but I’ve stopped coloring my hair and am starting to embrace the freedom that comes from just not caring. Watch out, world!

My SIL is 72 and men follow her around the grocery store. I’m 58 and it depends on where I am - LOL.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I related to the woman on the conference call dreaming of getting goats and making cheese, and then trying to come up with names for her cheese company....ahhh the zone out during meetings.

+1. Only part of the article that really resonated with me. I just don't feel old at 42.

I didn't either, but I do now at 50. It's starting to catch up. My kids are 11 and 14, so it's not like I have little kids to take care of. But dam*, I'm just tired. I was just thinking about it tonight as I was trying to work out -- premenopausal, weight gain around the middle, dryness, etc... I had none of that at 42.

I’m 53, and yes my 40s got really more and more difficult. I am coming out the other side now and am very thankful.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 50 and the one thing really making me feel down is that 50% of my fellow citizens think it’s great that a racist misogynist who espouses hate is the leader of our country. I was totally okay with having been screwed out of promotions and pay because I’m a woman, especially since I had the pleasure of raising kids. But the fact that I don’t feel like I’ll be left alone to enjoy my hard-earned money in peace when I finally do get to retire . . . well, that makes me want to rip someone’s face off.

I completely get this.

FWIW, I'm coming to a certain peace about doing whatever TF I want because it's not like society values me anyway.

Yes! NP here, and I’m just starting to see what older women have told me about the power of invisibility. Once you go grey and get some wrinkles, people (men, really) honestly don’t even notice you! I’m 44 but I’ve stopped coloring my hair and am starting to embrace the freedom that comes from just not caring. Watch out, world!