Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you are in the wrong regardless of the law. It’s dark out, your kids should not be out on the street by themselves. It blows my mind that you saw a man you don’t know walk by several times and you didn’t think to go out.

I was outside after dark all the time growing up. These kids were right in front of their own home. People walk by with dogs all the time in most neighborhoods.

Quit the hysteria. OP did nothing wrong.

So much this. Many of you people are nuts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you are in the wrong regardless of the law. It’s dark out, your kids should not be out on the street by themselves. It blows my mind that you saw a man you don’t know walk by several times and you didn’t think to go out.

I was outside after dark all the time growing up. These kids were right in front of their own home. People walk by with dogs all the time in most neighborhoods.

Quit the hysteria. OP did nothing wrong.

+1

I agree.

When someone walks a dog, they usually go one way and then come back that way. Seeing a person walking a dog back and forth across the street from my house would not concern me.

Kids play outside after dark in our neighborhood all the time. The girls do exactly what OP described her daughters doing, the younger and tweens make bracelets and the older teen girls just hang out. The boys of all ages are usually in a driveway or the end of the cul-de-sac shooting hoops.

Our neighborhood is also very well lit like OP described. The kids are out alone but they are not unattended by any means. Parents are constantly checking on them and calling different ones to come in for dinner.

I'm not in MD, but where my kids go to school in VA, they don't get out until late (elementary is ~3, middle is ~3:30, and high school is ~4:15). My teens in high school don't get off the bus until 4:55 when it's already pretty much dark. My middle school kid doesn't get home until 4:05, so after a quick snack and doing homework, it's dark by the time she's finished. If they didn't get to go outside after dark, they'd not get any good play/exercise until the weekends if it's a night where they don't have a sports practice.

I see nothing wrong with what OP did. The only thing I see wrong with what the passerby did was his aggressiveness and yelling. Neither were called for in that situation.

Was he older, OP? I only ask because now that my mom is older, she has become overly cautious and wears rose colored glasses when she remembers her parenting of the past. She's very "I would NEVER let my daughter walk alone..." as I sit next to her remembering all of the times she let me and places I'd walk to. She also likes to claim that we never played outside without her supervision but I remember plenty of times when we'd be playing outside and she'd be napping on the couch when I went in for a drink. Heck, one time I even filled up our kiddie pool for myself and friends while she slept on the couch 15 feet from the screen door.

Anonymous wrote:If the guy works for the county, he may be able to pull strings other random cranks cannot. Just be careful.

Of course you can always play the "why are you approaching my daughters" card.

If he was telling the truth, he still might just a school janitor. Not a lot of pull there.

Anonymous wrote:Yes it's a rule in moco. Children under 8 must have someone 13 or older with them.

Only in a house.

Anonymous wrote:If the guy works for the county, he may be able to pull strings other random cranks cannot. Just be careful.

Of course you can always play the "why are you approaching my daughters" card.

If he comes up to the kids again, I would ask him his name and what county department he works for. “I’m going to report you” is a two-way street.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids hang outside after dark so I don’t think it is a big deal in general, but if I saw a man walking up and down the street I would be outside after the first pass. Why the hell were you inside watching it on camera to the point he was having a conversation with your kids’ lengthy enough to make one cry?

That is irresponsible parenting.

Agreed. If you were watching, you should have been outside the INSTANT a stranger started talking to your children.

I did post this before but I did go the instant I saw him walk up to them. Neither of them actually spoke to him because they knew they shouldn’t. My 6 year old told me that he wanted me as I was walking to the door. She was crying because she thought she was in trouble. At first I just thought it was a person walking their dog which people do a lot on our street.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids hang outside after dark so I don’t think it is a big deal in general, but if I saw a man walking up and down the street I would be outside after the first pass. Why the hell were you inside watching it on camera to the point he was having a conversation with your kids’ lengthy enough to make one cry?

That is irresponsible parenting.

Agreed. If you were watching, you should have been outside the INSTANT a stranger started talking to your children.

I'm sorry, I didn't read your follow up that this is what you did.

Anonymous wrote:My kids hang outside after dark so I don’t think it is a big deal in general, but if I saw a man walking up and down the street I would be outside after the first pass. Why the hell were you inside watching it on camera to the point he was having a conversation with your kids’ lengthy enough to make one cry?

That is irresponsible parenting.

Agreed. If you were watching, you should have been outside the INSTANT a stranger started talking to your children.

Call the police, provide the screen shot, he was harassing you and your children. He could be a predator staking out your children, for all you know.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes it's a rule in moco. Children under 8 must have someone 13 or older with them.

No, it’s a MARYLAND law.

http://dhs.maryland.gov/documents/Child%20Protective%20Services/Brochures/Unattended-Childre-Brochure-2016.pdf

Nope. That law is specific to being confined in a house or car.
Remember the huge news a few years ago when some kids were walking home alone from the park.
MD DHS issues a statement explicitly stating that the 8 year old law does NOT apply to kids playing alone outside.

NP-- This is correct. Our MoCo home and elementary school are in a very diverse and compact/walkable neighborhood and the school (maybe MCPS itself?) sends home a back-to-school letter that, among other things, VERY explicitly says basically "Do NOT call CPS on, or attempt to intercept or grill, kids who are walking home from school alone, hanging out in their neighborhood alone, etc., even if they appear to be under 8. Being outside alone is LEGAL." They further note that "different cultures have different rules for independence and this is NOT ILLEGAL." They say something like they recommend kids start walking by themselves in ~3rd grade, but reiterate that it's not prohibited at any age.

The 8-year-old rule is very very narrowly tailored to buildings and cars.

This is true in most jurisdictions. Unfortunately there are senile people (of most any age) who are more than willing to pick up the phone and complain about absolutely nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes it's a rule in moco. Children under 8 must have someone 13 or older with them.

No, it’s a MARYLAND law.

http://dhs.maryland.gov/documents/Child%20Protective%20Services/Brochures/Unattended-Childre-Brochure-2016.pdf

Nope. That law is specific to being confined in a house or car.
Remember the huge news a few years ago when some kids were walking home alone from the park.
MD DHS issues a statement explicitly stating that the 8 year old law does NOT apply to kids playing alone outside.

NP-- This is correct. Our MoCo home and elementary school are in a very diverse and compact/walkable neighborhood and the school (maybe MCPS itself?) sends home a back-to-school letter that, among other things, VERY explicitly says basically "Do NOT call CPS on, or attempt to intercept or grill, kids who are walking home from school alone, hanging out in their neighborhood alone, etc., even if they appear to be under 8. Being outside alone is LEGAL." They further note that "different cultures have different rules for independence and this is NOT ILLEGAL." They say something like they recommend kids start walking by themselves in ~3rd grade, but reiterate that it's not prohibited at any age.

The 8-year-old rule is very very narrowly tailored to buildings and cars.

Anonymous wrote:I don't know about the law, but common sense tells me OP was totally in the right.

10 and 6 is definitely old enough to be outside alone. Even without the windows and cameras. Don't they wait at the bus stop alone? Walk or bike to school? Play baseball or tag or hang out with friends?

The dark gives me some pause, but it doesn't seem like it was dangerously dark - this man could see the kids from across the street for example.

OP, I think you're totally fine. I would stand up the man and tell him not to approach your children again.

Thank the gods. A sane poster.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I'm sorry you experienced this, you might enjoy the book "Small Animals" It's about the shifts in recent years of people's perception of "safety" when kids aren't next to our sides 24/7 (OP you're doing the right thing! This is good for your kids). It's about a mom who experienced something similar to you, though hers went much farther. It's very interesting and will invalidate some of the fear mongering going on in this thread. The person who said "they could trip and fall in the low light and that's a risk you don't want to take" particularly captures the author's concerns in how things have shifted.. very interesting.

OP here. Thanks for the recommendation, I’m definitely going to read this.

Glad it was helpful, i think you'll like it. A friend recommended it and then we got coffee to chat about it

OP here. Thanks again for everyone weighing in. This is one of the only times my kids have appeared to be “alone”. Usually all of the neighbors are out with them. 2 days out of the week they are at their 3 hr sports practice so they are not playing out there but even when we get home at 8 some kids are still out there. I posted a photo up thread of what my house is set up like. The backyard is small and more people can see them because the garage and street is in the back. I thought they were safer in front but obviously not to this guy.

If the guy works for the county, he may be able to pull strings other random cranks cannot. Just be careful.

Of course you can always play the "why are you approaching my daughters" card.