I'm in the camp of letting it go. Once my mom gets a name stuck wrong in her head it's stays there. She might remember for a while, and then she goes back to spelling or saying it the way she originally filed it.

My name is Jeanne. Not once did my grandmother spelled it correctly. Always, always Jean. I was 8 or 9 when she gave me something with "Jean" on it and I expressed how sad I was that my name was misspelled. Grandma's reaction was to say my parents were stupid for spelling my name wrong and I was stupid for taking their side.

A real winner of a grandmother. Hit the grandma jackpot, didn't I?

Needless to say, that utterly poisoned our relationship

This. Op, it is not your responsibility to salvage their relationship. It's not your responsibility to assure your DD doesn't get hurt. A little hurt over this issue, instead of something bigger, helps your DD learn who Grandma is and your DD will be wiser for the knowledge.

We named our child a family name, which happens to be SIL middle name. She later let us know that she intended that name fir her kid (not born at the time ), but can’t use it now for first cousins. She ultimately named her DD something else.

Initially , we used a shortened version as a nickname (think Katie vs Katherine) for the first few years; but now that DD has started school she goes by the ”real” name. However, SIL still calls DD the nickname. Dd answers to both but we’ve shared that anything written should be the real name. SIL refuses. DD is now 9 and SIL and although others slip sometimes, SIL is the only close relative that seems to do it intentionally.,

Is it possible that this has to do with the rules of the companies Grandma orders from? One company I order from (Land's End) will monogram a first name of UP to 10 letters. You can't order more letters--even if you're willing to pay extra. So, using your example, AnneClaire would work. Anne Claire would not. Other companies will do it but the cost really jumps and it takes longer to ship.

She's doing it on purpose and it's not cute. I would never intentionally spell my grandchild's name wrong no matter how much I didn't like the name. It's my grandchild FFS! Nothing says how much grandma loves you like refusing to recognize your actual name. Absurd. Grow up, grandma!

Sounds like my ILs. DC has a name like Katy-they spell and engrave it as Katie. So annoying! I get them back by spelling their names wrong. Yasmine becomes Jasmin. Mark becomes Marc. I know it’s petty, but it feels good.

My name is Jeanne. Not once did my grandmother spelled it correctly. Always, always Jean. I was 8 or 9 when she gave me something with "Jean" on it and I expressed how sad I was that my name was misspelled. Grandma's reaction was to say my parents were stupid for spelling my name wrong and I was stupid for taking their side.

A real winner of a grandmother. Hit the grandma jackpot, didn't I?

Needless to say, that utterly poisoned our relationship.

Anonymous wrote:So what? I'm the "grandchild" in this situation and it never made a whit of difference to me. In fact, I remember thinking "Grandma has a special name for me."

+1. My very stubborn, controlling Grandfather thought I should have been named after his mother, and it didn’t matter that I was not. He called me by his Mother’s name for the rest of his life. In person, letters, everything. My parents just rolled their eyes and laughed. I thought it was normal and thought everyone’s Grandfather gave them a special nickname.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So what? I'm the "grandchild" in this situation and it never made a whit of difference to me. In fact, I remember thinking "Grandma has a special name for me."

Wow you were a dumb kid

Hoping you’re less of a grouch in 2020!

Anonymous wrote:So what? I'm the "grandchild" in this situation and it never made a whit of difference to me. In fact, I remember thinking "Grandma has a special name for me."

Wow you were a dumb kid

MIL believes the spacing doesn’t matter.

I wouldn’t care either.

What a strange thing to be upset about, OP! It's not as if everyone was making this tiny error.

Anonymous wrote:Darn right grandma is doing it on purpose. Team MIL. OP is a pretentious can't name my child one name princess.

Well, let’s just hope the real name is better than Anne Claire. Even Anna Claire would be better.

Darn right grandma is doing it on purpose. Team MIL. OP is a pretentious can't name my child one name princess.