Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is “thinking poor”. I grew up with parents who married “very” young and always “thought poor”. My dad was in the trades and always made the bulk of his income during the summer. Every year my parents blew whatever money was in their pocket because they “needed a treat” or a “break from the stress”. Then every winter, our utilities would be turned off until they could scrape up the pennies, we would be hungry, have basically no Christmas presents and the bill collectors would be calling. Think they would learn after a few years? Nope. Now I have parents with debts who saved nothing for retirement.

Honestly, I think poor kids would be better off if this behavior was stigmatized a bit. Adults who behave like this need to learn a lesson about consequences and so do their kids. I took school very seriously and had lots of motivation to not end up like them (college, birth control and spending within means after paying my student loans).

Yes, kids want to belong, but making that happen can be a strong motivator to get a job and try in school. Instead we are teaching people how to game government, nonprofits and people on Gofundme to get what they want instead of fixing the things in their life that need to be fixed for the long-term.

I was a poor kid like this and I think you’re terrible human being.

Believe me I learned life’s hard lessons every single day of my childhood. I tried to save money from odd jobs but my parents always took the cash from my piggy bank so I gave up. I didn’t have many other options at age 9.

A poor kid getting an angel tree present - even a kid from an undeserving

family (as defined by you) is not a bad thing.

I repeat, you are the scum of the earth.

So I will take a guess that you are no longer poor.

So you can't really understand generational poverty. The poster is right both the adults and kids have to suffer some consequences to change. You even admit it yourself - you had your money taken away by your parents over and over - that's suffering a consequence.

But generational poverty in this area doesn't work that way. Now the grandparents who are living in public housing often have their great grandchildren living with them. All those kids grew up seeing how to get handouts. There is a good size group of those people that if you cut them off tomorrow would struggle at first and then figure out how to move forward. Poor doesn't equal stupid. They can figure how to sacrifice some of their own needs and take care of their kids without assistance if they had too. They just don't have too.

Unbelievable. You have no idea how generational poverty works. Have some compassion.

Insights on people who may be poor but seemingly live with certain comforts:

1. They DONT pay full price. That seemingly expensive object, hairstyle, or experience showing up on Instagram was probably obtained at some deep deep discount or obtained in a way that many full price payers would not accept (payment plan to a family member, two day trips, recycled items, knockoffs, etc)

2. Poor/indigent does not always mean ignorant. In our case, a medical disability and traumatic event sidelined our family for years. This did not erase our intelligence, it did impact our ability to maintain a high HHI. Making good decisions early on could mean that a family has a nice home or decent car, but possibly has a low expense ratio due to being the ant inba grasshopper sort of world.

My HHI is 300k, and I don’t buy that brand for several reasons, one being that they are too expensive. The one and only time I went in the store to shop, the salesperson ignored me while she talked to some self-absorbed chick who was telling her about how she weighs her food. I left and never went back.

To be fair, LuLus last a very long time. I have several pairs of pants that have lasted a decade- even with being washed and dried 1-2 times a week. Other brands only last me a couple years. So I’d rather pay the higher price for something that will last several years longer.

That being said, the guy who started Lululemon is a racist a-hole, so I don’t buy their clothes anymore. Which is a shame, because I haven’t found anything as good.

I don’t see the big deal here. To her, lulu shorts are a basic Clothing item. Perhaps they are shorts she will wear daily for work and hold up extremely well. You don’t know her or her life.

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the hoopla about those shorts. They aren't even flattering?!?

My first thought, also! Those shorts don't do any of them any favors.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is “thinking poor”. I grew up with parents who married “very” young and always “thought poor”. My dad was in the trades and always made the bulk of his income during the summer. Every year my parents blew whatever money was in their pocket because they “needed a treat” or a “break from the stress”. Then every winter, our utilities would be turned off until they could scrape up the pennies, we would be hungry, have basically no Christmas presents and the bill collectors would be calling. Think they would learn after a few years? Nope. Now I have parents with debts who saved nothing for retirement.

Honestly, I think poor kids would be better off if this behavior was stigmatized a bit. Adults who behave like this need to learn a lesson about consequences and so do their kids. I took school very seriously and had lots of motivation to not end up like them (college, birth control and spending within means after paying my student loans).

Yes, kids want to belong, but making that happen can be a strong motivator to get a job and try in school. Instead we are teaching people how to game government, nonprofits and people on Gofundme to get what they want instead of fixing the things in their life that need to be fixed for the long-term.

I was a poor kid like this and I think you’re terrible human being.

Believe me I learned life’s hard lessons every single day of my childhood. I tried to save money from odd jobs but my parents always took the cash from my piggy bank so I gave up. I didn’t have many other options at age 9.

A poor kid getting an angel tree present - even a kid from an undeserving family (as defined by you) is not a bad thing.

I repeat, you are the scum of the earth.

I think she's judging your parents in this situation, not you. It's not YOUR fault you were poor as a kid. (At least I hope she's saying it's not your fault you were poor as a kid.)

I was judging my OWN parents, if you read the post.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is “thinking poor”. I grew up with parents who married “very” young and always “thought poor”. My dad was in the trades and always made the bulk of his income during the summer. Every year my parents blew whatever money was in their pocket because they “needed a treat” or a “break from the stress”. Then every winter, our utilities would be turned off until they could scrape up the pennies, we would be hungry, have basically no Christmas presents and the bill collectors would be calling. Think they would learn after a few years? Nope. Now I have parents with debts who saved nothing for retirement.

Honestly, I think poor kids would be better off if this behavior was stigmatized a bit. Adults who behave like this need to learn a lesson about consequences and so do their kids. I took school very seriously and had lots of motivation to not end up like them (college, birth control and spending within means after paying my student loans).

Yes, kids want to belong, but making that happen can be a strong motivator to get a job and try in school. Instead we are teaching people how to game government, nonprofits and people on Gofundme to get what they want instead of fixing the things in their life that need to be fixed for the long-term.

I was a poor kid like this and I think you’re terrible human being.

Believe me I learned life’s hard lessons every single day of my childhood. I tried to save money from odd jobs but my parents always took the cash from my piggy bank so I gave up. I didn’t have many other options at age 9.

A poor kid getting an angel tree present - even a kid from an undeserving family (as defined by you) is not a bad thing.

I repeat, you are the scum of the earth.

Thanks...

Me again - the "scum of the earth" PP. You know what I think about angel tree presents? I think they are great, and our family does that every year. But, I still wouldn't buy $58 leggings. It is another lesson on thinking poor. Buy practical shoes and warm clothes, books, maybe a set of Frozen sheets or sports equipment or art supplies or puzzles. Things that can actually make this child's life better. No "Playstations" or other electronics that somehow every kid ends up with and that further the academic divide. No giftcards that encourage the "windfall" mindset.

I don't know how old you are, and I'm sorry that you suffered (although you don't seem to return the sentiment), but poverty post-Obama is really different from my childhood and I do worry about the effects of cushioning every blow for people, erasing all stigma for turning to the taxpayer for support and a developing sense of entitlement. I will repeat that in the long-run, people who work to leave poverty are better off.

I am also skeptical that there are lots of poor kids who never get nice items (unless their parents are addicts). Typically the "thinking poor" parents have blown cash to treat their kid sometime just like the lady in the article. That was kind of my point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is “thinking poor”. I grew up with parents who married “very” young and always “thought poor”. My dad was in the trades and always made the bulk of his income during the summer. Every year my parents blew whatever money was in their pocket because they “needed a treat” or a “break from the stress”. Then every winter, our utilities would be turned off until they could scrape up the pennies, we would be hungry, have basically no Christmas presents and the bill collectors would be calling. Think they would learn after a few years? Nope. Now I have parents with debts who saved nothing for retirement.

Honestly, I think poor kids would be better off if this behavior was stigmatized a bit. Adults who behave like this need to learn a lesson about consequences and so do their kids. I took school very seriously and had lots of motivation to not end up like them (college, birth control and spending within means after paying my student loans).

Yes, kids want to belong, but making that happen can be a strong motivator to get a job and try in school. Instead we are teaching people how to game government, nonprofits and people on Gofundme to get what they want instead of fixing the things in their life that need to be fixed for the long-term.

I was a poor kid like this and I think you’re terrible human being.

Believe me I learned life’s hard lessons every single day of my childhood. I tried to save money from odd jobs but my parents always took the cash from my piggy bank so I gave up. I didn’t have many other options at age 9.

A poor kid getting an angel tree present - even a kid from an undeserving family (as defined by you) is not a bad thing.

I repeat, you are the scum of the earth.

Thanks...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is “thinking poor”. I grew up with parents who married “very” young and always “thought poor”. My dad was in the trades and always made the bulk of his income during the summer. Every year my parents blew whatever money was in their pocket because they “needed a treat” or a “break from the stress”. Then every winter, our utilities would be turned off until they could scrape up the pennies, we would be hungry, have basically no Christmas presents and the bill collectors would be calling. Think they would learn after a few years? Nope. Now I have parents with debts who saved nothing for retirement.

Honestly, I think poor kids would be better off if this behavior was stigmatized a bit. Adults who behave like this need to learn a lesson about consequences and so do their kids. I took school very seriously and had lots of motivation to not end up like them (college, birth control and spending within means after paying my student loans).

Yes, kids want to belong, but making that happen can be a strong motivator to get a job and try in school. Instead we are teaching people how to game government, nonprofits and people on Gofundme to get what they want instead of fixing the things in their life that need to be fixed for the long-term.

I was a poor kid like this and I think you’re terrible human being.

Believe me I learned life’s hard lessons every single day of my childhood. I tried to save money from odd jobs but my parents always took the cash from my piggy bank so I gave up. I didn’t have many other options at age 9.

A poor kid getting an angel tree present - even a kid from an undeserving

family (as defined by you) is not a bad thing.

I repeat, you are the scum of the earth.

So I will take a guess that you are no longer poor.

So you can't really understand generational poverty. The poster is right both the adults and kids have to suffer some consequences to change. You even admit it yourself - you had your money taken away by your parents over and over - that's suffering a consequence.

But generational poverty in this area doesn't work that way. Now the grandparents who are living in public housing often have their great grandchildren living with them. All those kids grew up seeing how to get handouts. There is a good size group of those people that if you cut them off tomorrow would struggle at first and then figure out how to move forward. Poor doesn't equal stupid. They can figure how to sacrifice some of their own needs and take care of their kids without assistance if they had too. They just don't have too.

Anonymous wrote:I was recently in Nordstrom buying a pair of AGL flats which I wear daily. They cost $315 but are comfortable and last. The salesperson was also helping a young woman who was trying on boots. She kept asking if he had more expensive boots. He finally bought a pair that he announced were a little over $500. They had three inch heels and were above the knee but very ugly IMHO. The young woman looked told me u was a sucker for buying shoes no one had heard of; she was buying boots. She pulled six $100 bills from her wallet that had a visible SNAP card and a WIC card.

I wanted comfortable shoes; she wanted boots that would be recognized as expensive.

100% made up story

I used to work in poverty services. Most poor people are honest folk trying to get by in difficult circumstances. A very smalll percentage are super entitled scam artists with a victim mentality who think that the world should give them freebie just for existing. But there are definitely rich folks like that too. There are even people who live on Pennsylvania Avenue like that.

Anonymous wrote:Please don't judge others.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2014/07/08/this-is-what-happened-when-i-drove-my-mercedes-to-pick-up-food-stamps/

Oh, I don't judge this author at all! That sounds horrible - Can you imagine having to go on maternity leave AND your husband losing his job during the great recession? And then you get pregnant and learn the baby is really TWO babies to feed? What a nightmare, and that woman did the right thing, asking for help.

What I did NOT see, anywhere in that article, was her saying "I thought rich people sucked but then I bought a $60 pair of workout shorts, like they wear, and I realized I deserve nice things too, so yeah I asked the rich moms to buy my kids' Christmas presents, cause I blew all the Christmas money on shorts."

The mom in the first article is an idiot. The mom in the second article is a resourceful woman who fell on hard times and did what she had to do to feed her babies.

OP here.

I have no problem with her buying the Lululemon stuff. If she wants to make bad financial decisions, that’s on her. It’s the signing up for Christmas gifts that really pi$$es me off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this real? Lmfao buying $58 shorts allowed her to give herself the grace to ask for help??? Oh my GAWD, learn some shame, lady!

I can't even find the logic in that statement. I don't understand. Possibly because it makes no sense?

"Giving myself grace" is a saying super christian southern mommy blogger types say. I was trying to paraphrase how this woman speaks.