Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 18:56     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Neighbor can take op to court. I know I would if I were wrongfully accused.


And what exactly do you think will happen in court?

Neighbor can get a judgement against OP's daughter? How much money do you think OP's daughter has?


Doesn't matter. OP will have to pay for lawyers to defend the lawsuit.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 18:54     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Have not read the posts. I have no real suggestions. Except ugh. I wish you good strength and support.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 18:51     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:The police are not your friends. They do not have your or your child's best interests in mind. You should at least consult an attorney to discuss how to handle questioning and whether the attorney should be present or merely on call.


Of course they are, and yes they do. This is why they are investigating. When a person makes a claim like this - even a might - they want to know about it, for the good of the community.

OP, your daughter has a real responsibility here to tell the truth and nothing more, nothing less. I agree with the PPs who say that the word "might" is a loaded term and carries all sorts of implications. Either it happened or it didn't. She needs to work on this, with the therapist and get to the bottom of it.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 18:48     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:The police are not your friends. They do not have your or your child's best interests in mind. You should at least consult an attorney to discuss how to handle questioning and whether the attorney should be present or merely on call.


Of course they are, and yes they do. This is why they are investigating. When a person makes a claim like this - even a might - they want to know about it, for the good of the community.

OP, your daughter has a real responsibility here to tell the truth and nothing more, nothing less. I agree with the PPs who say that the word "might" is a loaded term and carries all sorts of implications. Either it happened or it didn't. She needs to work on this, with the therapist and get to the bottom of it.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 18:33     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Op if this is Montgomery county, police are supposed to use a victim-led approach. Your daughter wants to talk? They will listen. They are NEVER supposed to push. The point is to help the victim be empowered to direct the legal process in a way she’s comfortable with. The detectives have all been trauma trained.

Can’t say the same for a defense attorney of course, if it gets that far.

Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 17:50     Subject: Police interview re my teen
The questioning techniques used by the sex abuse therapists who interviewed the kids in the McMartin case were not even considered the standard at the time. They were really bad. They were already known to cause false memories at the time. That is not how anyone who knows what they are doing interviews anymore.

Don't question your child yourself, op.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 17:50     Subject: Re:Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The therapist is a mandatory reporter. They had to go to police.

The police have to investigate. They dont' have to file charges, but they do need to investigate. Otherwise, people would be mad if police did not investigate reports of crimes.

There is no statute of limitations on _most_ crimes like this in MD, with a few exceptions like a fourth degree sex offense. Here's the list of all of them:
https://apps.rainn.org/policy/policy-crime-definitions-export.cfm?state=Maryland&group=7

Request an SVID (special victims unit.. that's what they call it in MoCo) detective do the questioning.

My guess is nothing will come out of it since "he said, she said" is difficult to prove, especially 10 years later. However, they'll have that person on file so if they get more reports, that can help in future investigations. If this person really is an abuser, they tend to do it to more than one victim, so your DD"s cooperation can help another potential victim down the line.


Thank you! Finally a rational post that doesn't jump to extreme conclusions.


I also appreciated the post, and also think nothing is likely to come of it. Understood that it all feels very uncomfortable and anxiety-producing right now. I do not think OP needs to find a lawyer for the daughter.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 17:43     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is scary that your teen can potentially ruin someone's life. Either she remember or she doesn't. "Might" is a really scary word. I would make my teen write out a statement or tell me what happened before being interviewed by the police. The neighbor might not have even lived there 10 years ago or was never alone with the neighbor. It reminds me if the mcmartin preschool trials.



The parents in those trials grilled their kids and then took them to the police.

Your advice is the WORST THING op could do. She should not ask her dd about any details or ask her to write about it. You need someone trained in this area talking to your kid, not a parent. Parents are the ones who don't know how to question their kid without screwing it up.

Do NOT interrogate your kid, OP!


Nope, it wasn't the parents who interviewed the kids. The police investigators repeatedly grilled the kids and planted memories. Kids can be be incredibly susceptible to false memories. Being interviewed by the police is not an easy process and can be incredibly stressful. I would want to make sure there was more than just a feeling that a neighbor did something. If there were I would get my child their own lawyer.


The police mailed questionnaires to the families for them to ask their children. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/McMartin_preschool_trial

This is not how things are done now. It was spectacularly terrible.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 17:16     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is scary that your teen can potentially ruin someone's life. Either she remember or she doesn't. "Might" is a really scary word. I would make my teen write out a statement or tell me what happened before being interviewed by the police. The neighbor might not have even lived there 10 years ago or was never alone with the neighbor. It reminds me if the mcmartin preschool trials.



The parents in those trials grilled their kids and then took them to the police.

Your advice is the WORST THING op could do. She should not ask her dd about any details or ask her to write about it. You need someone trained in this area talking to your kid, not a parent. Parents are the ones who don't know how to question their kid without screwing it up.

Do NOT interrogate your kid, OP!


Nope, it wasn't the parents who interviewed the kids. The police investigators repeatedly grilled the kids and planted memories. Kids can be be incredibly susceptible to false memories. Being interviewed by the police is not an easy process and can be incredibly stressful. I would want to make sure there was more than just a feeling that a neighbor did something. If there were I would get my child their own lawyer.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 16:23     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Neighbor can take op to court. I know I would if I were wrongfully accused.


And what exactly do you think will happen in court?

Neighbor can get a judgement against OP's daughter? How much money do you think OP's daughter has?


I'd go after OP if OP's daughter is a minor. If OP's daughter is not a minor, yes, I'd def go after OP's daughter. Not interested in getting money but I will do my best to make her life living hell as she has done to me.


Your weird fantasizing about this is bizarre.


IKR super defensive
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 16:13     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Neighbor can take op to court. I know I would if I were wrongfully accused.


And what exactly do you think will happen in court?

Neighbor can get a judgement against OP's daughter? How much money do you think OP's daughter has?


I'd go after OP if OP's daughter is a minor. If OP's daughter is not a minor, yes, I'd def go after OP's daughter. Not interested in getting money but I will do my best to make her life living hell as she has done to me.


Your weird fantasizing about this is bizarre.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 16:01     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Neighbor can take op to court. I know I would if I were wrongfully accused.


And what exactly do you think will happen in court?

Neighbor can get a judgement against OP's daughter? How much money do you think OP's daughter has?


I'd go after OP if OP's daughter is a minor. If OP's daughter is not a minor, yes, I'd def go after OP's daughter. Not interested in getting money but I will do my best to make her life living hell as she has done to me.


You are off your rocker and have a lot of anger here that is not warranted. You can't just pick a rich relative to "go after" even if if that person's parent. You also sound unhinged. There is NOT an epidemic of wrongful accusations out there, no matter what the media you follow tells you.

Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 15:58     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Dp. Police might investigate but unless they are pretty sure, there will be no arrest. 30 years ago (my god, it has been that long), I got in a dispute with some neighbors about vandalism there kids were doing. A 10 yo girl accursed me (25 m grad student) of following her to school for several days and peeping. Police started tailing me. She reported it happened again on a day when they know where I was(in my lab at 7:30 am on). No charges. I moved.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 15:27     Subject: Police interview re my teen
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Neighbor can take op to court. I know I would if I were wrongfully accused.


And what exactly do you think will happen in court?

Neighbor can get a judgement against OP's daughter? How much money do you think OP's daughter has?


I'd go after OP if OP's daughter is a minor. If OP's daughter is not a minor, yes, I'd def go after OP's daughter. Not interested in getting money but I will do my best to make her life living hell as she has done to me.
Anonymous
Post 11/26/2019 15:19     Subject: Police interview re my teen
How old was neighbor 10 years ago