I haven't read the prior comments but here is what we do. I generally feel very low stress. Two lawyers both with pretty flexible arrangements. Our kids are 1 and 3.

1. They both go to a fabulous daycare that we love. DH does drop off. Our partime nanny does pick up. She gets them at 4 and stays until 7. DH and I get home by 5, we make dinner (really simple recipes - I am not a great cook), and we all eat together around 5:30. Nanny cleans while we are eating dinner then all of us chip in with bedtime. Nanny finishes cleaning house while DH and I complete bedtime. Come down from bedtime to completely clean house. Cannot tell you how much this alleviates stress. She also handles all kid laundry and organizing their closets/drawers.

2. Nanny comes for one four hour chunk on the weekend. Usually Sunday afternoons. Just gives a little mental break or lets me take the older kid out by herself. I am usually around the house but organizing for the week, etc. Just so nice to have extra set of hands around.

3. When baby was small and not sleeping, we had a night nurse 3 nights a week. Also hire a sleep consultant.

4. Weekly house cleaners that do all sheets, towels, etc.

5. Early bed times. Kids are both in bed by 7. I go to sleep by 10 at the latest. Kids are up between 6:00-6:30. We spend 1.5 hours together in the AM and then they go to school and I get dressed to go to work/the gym.

Wish I had some tips for meal-planning but that is the one area I haven't really yet figured out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you people even having children? They are not a priority for you.

It's ok to not have children.

On the contrary it sounds like they’re outsourcing the mundane stuff so they can have quality time with the kids.

OP here - yeah I'll unabashedly say I'm a pretty damn awesome parent. I give me kids my everything and my work good enough. My house / fridge / linen closet / garden / car etc etc get shit and I have no talents at being a cook / housekeeper / gardner etc. But despite all my flaws, my parenting (while it has weaknesses and blunders like everyone) is not one of them

Anonymous wrote:Why are you people even having children? They are not a priority for you.

It's ok to not have children.

On the contrary it sounds like they’re outsourcing the mundane stuff so they can have quality time with the kids.

Why are you people even having children? They are not a priority for you.

It's ok to not have children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted on a different thread that I now stay home. We went from 2 demanding jobs to 1 demanding job plus 9-5 job. Then I got a more flexible job to PT job to now being a SAHM. We have 3 kids.

You need more than FT help. We used to have a full time nanny, housekeeper, cook and tutor. Our cook did the grocery shopping. I would tell her the meals I wanted. She used to cook for us 3x per week but make enough meals for the week. On weekends, we would still eat out and get delivery sometimes. We rarely did any housework. All my time home was quality time with the kids.

I sent my kid to preschool with extended care. I used to get sensitive about calling it daycare. I sent my older kid to preschool and also had a FT nanny.

When I had my third kid, I said I would get a night nurse but I never got one. I figured I would have to get up to nurse anyways.

When did you decide to stay home? I've considered it but honestly, the only thing that sounds more exhausting than fitting in work is taking care of my infant and 2 year old all day! They are relentless and weekends are even more exhausting in some ways.

OP here - Also I'm technically 60% at a job based on 50 hours a week. But each week I'm working 40-43 hours (my work is supportive of making 60% work but at the end of the day its my job to figure out how to structure it and so far I haven't. I take 2 mornings off a week typically to get time with each kid but then end up working late into the night to get work done and am just constant stressed bouncing from one task to the next

I haven't cooked since uber eats opened.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here. A good nanny can be a lifesaver.
My tasks:
All kid laundry (towels and bedding too)
Weekly grocery run
Weekly dry cleaning run
I prep all kid food (including homemade purees for the baby and leaving leftovers for the weekends) and I make family dinner 3 nights per week.
I make sure there is always toilet paper and baby wipes and paper towels
I manage all the random emails about school field trips, snack sign up, soccer games, ballet performances, etc.
I keep the family calendar updated with important dates and set up kid appointments and make sure everyone has their vaccinations and dentist checkups and all that stuff.
I manage the kids’ wardrobes. I shop off-season sales and rotate clothes each season and measure their feet and buy new shoes and winter coats and swim suits each year.

Basically I take on as much as possible of the logistical/mental load of parenting. My employers come home to kids who are bathed and ready to sit down to a family dinner and do the bedtime routine.

This is nice, but most nannies will not do all or half of this unless they are being paid like $30/hr.

She should be paid $50/hr!