Anonymous wrote:Is it normal in anyone's family for your DH to take your child to a doctor's appointment? I've been a sahm and have taken care of most of the doctor appointments and I am now transitioning into the work force and have tried to get DH to take DD for a routine doc appt. He's not eager, my DD wants me to go and now I'm just wondering if I'm asking too much from DH and DD? What is ok, what's not when it comes to "mothering"?

OP, you should give your DH a choice between handling the regular doctor appointments or handling the dental appointments. Then, each of you is doing half of the work, but you won't be stuck arguing about whose turn it is to handle an appointment.

Anonymous wrote:My husband couldn’t even name my child’s dr. Or dentist. Or orthodontist. Or probably even the vet.

plus “1”

DH is on the spectrum and doesn’t like dealing with new people. He handles some routine visits and all the regular dentist visits, plus barber shop duties since he’s going anyway. (Somehow we lump hair and teeth together when discussing so I figured I’d throw that in here.) I do specialist visits, anything gross (he can’t handle blood and has trouble with needles), all emotional things like therapy, and salon visits. DS needs surgery this winter, so I’ll handle all the consultations, stay overnight in the hospital with him, and do as much of the follow up as possible.

Exceptions are always made when there are work conflicts or other illnesses. I had a migraine when DS had to go to a specialist recently so DH took the afternoon off and went with him. DH had a presentation a few weeks ago so I had to take the kid to a dentist appointment. It all evens out in the end for us.

When I stayed home, I did all the appointments. It was my job. It didn’t make sense for him to take off work to do something I could do, unless it was a serious issue. He did come for a few specialist visits. He might not know off the top of his head what the name of the specialist we saw twice the previous year was, but he knew how to access the information. Knowing how to solve a problem is far more important than rote memorization. DH is a problem solver. If I die tomorrow, he’ll figure it all out.

Anonymous wrote:Gosh some of you are still living in the 1950s. In our house Dad is the main one doing doctors appointments because of the way our work schedules are. It’s crazy to think it would be “too much to ask” for a dad to take their child to a doctors appointment.

+ 1

Anonymous wrote:LOL. I sent DH alone with DS2 and a bottle for the 6 week check up so I could nap. I told him just to call me if the doctor had any questions he couldn't answer. Apparently the nurses couldn't stop talking about it and treated him like a god.

DH now handles all of older DS's doctor appointments because of puberty and DS1 is less embarrassed to have him there. I suspect DS2, now 11, will follow suit shortly. Assuming your DD is still young enough that they won't be discussing development and her period, I would let DH get comfortable doing it, too. When your daughter is older I would consider her preference more strongly.

Wow, are you lazy or what!

Gosh some of you are still living in the 1950s. In our house Dad is the main one doing doctors appointments because of the way our work schedules are. It’s crazy to think it would be “too much to ask” for a dad to take their child to a doctors appointment.

We both went together for a long time. Now, the person that is free or has less going on takes the kids to appointments.

We both generally go to most appts. It’s a toss up though on who catches the others. DD was in the hospital overnight last week, I stayed the night then DH came and picked her up and took her home and I went to an important work thing for the day. We both like to keep up on issues with the kids.