I don't miss anything about my 20's.

I am 41 and loving every second of it. I have more confidence. My career is thriving. I am out of a marriage that was holding me back. My kids are older. I rarely give a shit what anybody thinks, and I look great.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I definitely think this thinking is more associated with women.

I wouldn't say so. My husband feels the same way.

Honestly maybe it’s because he’s married. I’m divorced in 50s and my life is much better than being in my 20s. Not even comparable. Dating and sex, work satisfaction, travel, decent home and cars. Trips to London regularly. Exercise and ability to have a trainer. I would never go back.

Anonymous wrote:I'm in my early 50s, and I respectfully disagree. It's easy to focus on the fun part and block out the downsides of being 18-25.

These downsides include being more easily taken advantage of by men, by coworkers, etc. Being less willing to speak up for yourself. Being more obsessed with your external self than is healthy. Being quietly unsure of what you're doing. Placing more weight on the comments of others than they deserve. And that's just for starters.

Be grateful for where you are right now. Look ahead, not back.

Don’t forget the super sad, empty deflating “mornings after.”

Anonymous wrote:My early 20's sucked and I wouldn't want to re-live them.

+1

Anonymous wrote:47 years old and I have to admit, I miss my youth. And by youth I mean those glorious years between 18-25 when everything is so much fun. My life now is fine, I have a great husband, kids, job that I'm satisfied with, hobbies. But nothing beats the absolute effortless, goofy, silly FUN you have in your late teens/early 20's . It's so sad that such a magical stage passes so early in life. Sorry for being a Debbie Downer, not really looking for any advice just need to get it off my chest.

Hey, me, get off the computer! Not OP, but, aside from the kids, I could have written this.

Lots of things are better now. I can fly first class and stay in really nice places. I can take 10 trips a year. I have money for a nice car, nice house, nice clothes and pretty much whatever I need or want.

But there will never be a time again where so much possibility was ahead of me as when I was 18. Or where I had so little worries or responsibilities. I lived on $1,000 a month when I was 22. And I remember it being great.

This is a really good time to learn not to look back with so much nostalgia. As a habit, it will only become more and more damaging as you get older. I think the truth is a lot more complicated. I remember in my early 20s feeling broke, disconnected (as I went though a series of boyfriends and apartments), restless, and occasionally deeply distressed about the direction of my life. I remember visiting a friend in her 30s and wanting her life: the home, the family, the future. I didn’t know if I would ever get it. Now I have a wonderful husband and family and home and life. I would never go back in time just to get away from the daily grind of chores and responsibilities. I’m 44.

I'm in my early 50s, and I respectfully disagree. It's easy to focus on the fun part and block out the downsides of being 18-25.

These downsides include being more easily taken advantage of by men, by coworkers, etc. Being less willing to speak up for yourself. Being more obsessed with your external self than is healthy. Being quietly unsure of what you're doing. Placing more weight on the comments of others than they deserve. And that's just for starters.

Be grateful for where you are right now. Look ahead, not back.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a child in my mid-twenties so I’d have some time to do what I wanted after she left home. The care-free life of travel and fun is just around the bend for me.

Yeah, but being care free and traveling isn't anywhere near as fun at 40 as it is at 20. It's a mind-set that just can't come back.

Not true at all. I have more fun travelling in my 40’s because I’m more confident to travel alone, now I meet so many people of all ages on my travels. Have more resources, so now I don’t have to stay in a youth hostel but sometimes I still do because being around young people keeps me young. I love letting people from all over the world and that’s easy to do in a hostel (but get a single room!!). My mind is more open to adventure, so I’m not scared to go off the beaten path and travel to no traditional tourist destinations. When’s I was in my 20’s, travelling meant trips to London and Paris, to visit tourist sights. In my 40’s, I still like London and Paris, but now I want to go to Mongolia and sleep in a yurt or take cooking classes in Myanmar.

- 44 year old spinster who posted above.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One of the hallmarks if being old is yapping about being old. Don’t do it, and you won’t feel as old!

Yapping about being old is therapeutic.

-Old Person

Anonymous wrote:I had a child in my mid-twenties so I’d have some time to do what I wanted after she left home. The care-free life of travel and fun is just around the bend for me.

Yeah, but being care free and traveling isn't anywhere near as fun at 40 as it is at 20. It's a mind-set that just can't come back.

Anonymous wrote:One of the hallmarks if being old is yapping about being old. Don’t do it, and you won’t feel as old!

Yapping about being old is therapeutic.

Anonymous wrote:Curious if there’s a difference between how men and women feel. I’d kill to relive my 20s, but my DH wouldn’t relive his for all the money in the world. DH still travels for work and has a thriving career, while mine took a big hit after marriage/kids. So for him, 40s aren’t much different than 20s. Plus there are different standards for men and women in regards to parenting- I know many men who see their kids only once or twice a year because of exciting jobs, and everyone thinks they are great dads. Meanwhile I was criticized by everyone when I wanted to go back to work when my kids were little.

What most people miss about their youth is just the effortless fun that comes from the silliness and goofiness of youth. Life might be good for your husband now with his thriving career, but it's probably not as "fun" as when he was 20.

Anonymous wrote:I definitely think this thinking is more associated with women.

I wouldn't say so. My husband feels the same way.

Anonymous wrote:I miss many aspects of being young.

Mostly:
• Not having to color my hair every few weeks in order to cover pesky grays.
What a chore!!
I used to dye my hair for fun back then.

• Having an excellent metabolism and feeling and feeling great about my body.
(I never thought I would gain as much weight as people warned me!!)

• Knowing that I had plenty of time to make my dreams come true.
I dreamed of marriage, a house, a career + vacations I would take.
Yes - -
I was a young dreamer then.

Agree with all of these; especially the part of having a great body and not having to work much for it.
I remember looking at myself naked in the morning one day in my late 20s and I was like, Damn I look good.
And now....