16 year old age gap in our family and children are very close. Combination of luck, EFFORT (on behalf of older child and parents) and things being what everyone makes of them, with understanding this wasn't your questioned gap. Good luck!

Anonymous wrote:15 months apart for my 3 kids. Its the same with myself and my siblings. Consecutive grades at school for my kids, as it was with my siblings. We are/were incredibly close, yet incredibly different people. We all had "the same childhood", unlike the wide age gap kids.

Dp. How does this answer or have anything to with the question?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 4.5 years apart from my younger sister. She was my best friend from the day she was born and still is now (at 40/36 yrs).

thats really sweet. I'm not OP, but im looking at this same age gap and these posts make me happy

Same here, 4-5 years min will be our age gap as well!

15 months apart for my 3 kids. Its the same with myself and my siblings. Consecutive grades at school for my kids, as it was with my siblings. We are/were incredibly close, yet incredibly different people. We all had "the same childhood", unlike the wide age gap kids.

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how much gender has to do with it? Do opposite gender siblings with a big gap tend to be less close than same gender siblings with a big gap?

I’m the baby of my family, all girls. My sister who is 3 1/2 years older than me didn’t become my friend until well into adulthood, but the sister who is 7 years older was always very close to me.

I wonder about this too.

I have two boys, ages 11 and 7. The 7 yr old spends a lot of time trying to get the 11 yr old to play with him and be on his team. The 11 yr old spends time trying to ignore his brother and not be on his team because he's little. The dynamics were fine up until about 2 years ago. Hopefully, things will get better as they both mature.

My brother is 4.5 years older than I am and my sister is almost 3 years older than I am. Growing up I adored my brother. These days I’m closer to my sister. I loved being about 2 years apart and always wanted that, but my kids (2 girls) ended up 4 years 4 MOs apart. The little one is almost two and a half, her sister is almost 7. They adore each other and play together a lot, but there is also a lot of apart time. It’s a balance.

Yesterday: we went to the zoo as a family. They crawled around in the grass pretending to be animals and then had each other in stitches blowing bubbles in the bathtub. Today: the older one was mad the younger one was trying to play with her toys, then they snuggled and held hands watching cartoons. I took the little one to the grocery store while the older one played with her toys, then I took them both swimming. After swimming and lunch the two year old napped and I took the older one on a special outing. We hired a sitter who took them both to the playground from 4-6 so we could get some things done, and then ate as a family. My husband got the toddler ready for bed while the older one went bike riding and had s’mores with neighbors and then both girls went down around 8 (since the 6 year old doesn’t nap). So, some time as a family and some time apart.

I was really sad when we were trying our children were going to be further apart (if it happened at all) than I’d hoped, but it’s amazing so far. My closest fried from childhood is 4 yrs older than her sister and they’ve always been so close. She wanted her kids 4 years apart, but got married in her late 30’s so ended up feeling like she had to have them back to back.

I haven’t read all the replies. Mine are 4.5 years apart (currently 5.5 & almost 10). Different sexes, but they play together and fight together like any other siblings. They are close and find things they both want to play. Yes, younger one gets dragged to older one’s activities, but that’s not a big deal. We do family outings everyone enjoys. Zero regrets about this spacing. It was nice not having two babies at the same time.

Anonymous wrote:Well, I'll go against the grain here. 4.5 age gap for us and at 4 and 8 they adore each other. Always have. I cant speak for older years but it's been perfect for our family.

+1 Same here. Our kids are 3.5 and 7 and they are like too peas in a pod and have been since our younger one was born. They play, they squabble, but they can't stand being apart. It's just personalities. I have friends with kids 1-2 years apart who get along much less well. Agree with the PP that said you're overthinking this OP. Life doesn't come with guarantees. (And from a personal mothering note, I was so glad to have time to appreciate the babyhood of each of my kids, rather than having a baby when my baby was still a baby.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 4.5 years apart from my younger sister. She was my best friend from the day she was born and still is now (at 40/36 yrs).

same for me

I have a 5 year gap, and while I wasn't interested in my little sister from when I was in middle school to high school, I grew to really appreciate her when she hit high school and I was in college.

Anonymous wrote:I am 4.5 years apart from my younger sister. She was my best friend from the day she was born and still is now (at 40/36 yrs).

same for me