Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 12:03     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
All this rings so true. DS loves soccer but there's nope of him playing soccer in college so we've been very relaxed about it all and watching the competition from afar. But the tension between all the parents this month has been unbelievable and I have caught myself a few times feeling pretty bad.

DS really doesn't care if he goes to a lower team but everyone keeps telling us he and I should care which I have to be honest is really making my stomach hurt.

Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 11:25     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
I am very happy this year...DS decided not to play next year and is just having fun these last games...and playing the best he has.

The coach asked what the deal was and our son is more into martial arts/MMA training...we offered him to come back for games to be a goon on travel if needed.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 11:05     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


Unbelievable. Assume Arlington as well.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 10:36     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
Awww. Good spin, but most are just complete **ssholes....until their kid gets demoted or one of their other kids is not on a top team and they get to see how the treatment is from that end.


You are probably- especially at U9/U10 when everyone is completely nuts! Still, most people are mean because they are insecure.

But people do learn over the years. In a few years, that smug U9 top team dad could be driving two hours to watch his son's U14 4th team play hideous soccer. That will shut him up.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 10:22     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
The parents are the worst and it starts at a very young age---u9 tryouts. I have heard of younger kid parents making fun of lower team parents that bring their kids to DA ID sessions. AS IF?!?!!! But, in their world, where you get labeled at U8 is how you will remain the rest of your development. I mean, a kid really couldn't change from U8 to U12, correct? Toxic.


U9 and u10 tryouts are the absolute worst. Even sane parents come to believe that their child's athletic future hangs in the balance.
People chill a bit more each successive year.

At the heart of this parental insanity is insecurity and uncertainty which is a byproduct of the system. Sure, some parents are in it to brag about their "top team" player." But most of us just want to see our kids improving and having fun playing soccer. If clubs did a better job with their lower level teams and actually made some effort evaluate existing players based not only on current level (and size) but also on commitment, awareness, and interest, perhaps they would put together more cohesive teams which would lead to more players being happy regardless of placement. Also, for those players being cut or demoted, if the coaching staff has a good idea which players will not be given offers for the next year, why not speak with the player and parents and let the players practice or play a game or two with the B team to get a feel for the coach and other players on the team? If tryouts are starting in April and early May, there is plenty of time to ease the transition.

Give those top team parents who seem snotty or even malicious a break. They and their kids might have enjoyed their season and are just nervous about not being asked back. It seems petty, but the uncertainty makes normally nice people into idiots. I've been there - on both sides. With so much family time and money at stake, the prospect of having to reestablish new routines and relationships year after year puts everyone on edge. That bitchy mom might be a single mom who depends on her son's top team teammate to drive her son to practice and games. That nervous and distant dad might be best friends with another dad on the team and hopes to continue to hang out during practices and tournament weekends. This stuff isn't just about proving your kid is the greatest u11 player ever or ensuring a path to professional glory.


Awww. Good spin, but most are just complete **ssholes....until their kid gets demoted or one of their other kids is not on a top team and they get to see how the treatment is from that end.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 10:17     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
The parents are the worst and it starts at a very young age---u9 tryouts. I have heard of younger kid parents making fun of lower team parents that bring their kids to DA ID sessions. AS IF?!?!!! But, in their world, where you get labeled at U8 is how you will remain the rest of your development. I mean, a kid really couldn't change from U8 to U12, correct? Toxic.


U9 and u10 tryouts are the absolute worst. Even sane parents come to believe that their child's athletic future hangs in the balance.
People chill a bit more each successive year.

At the heart of this parental insanity is insecurity and uncertainty which is a byproduct of the system. Sure, some parents are in it to brag about their "top team" player." But most of us just want to see our kids improving and having fun playing soccer. If clubs did a better job with their lower level teams and actually made some effort evaluate existing players based not only on current level (and size) but also on commitment, awareness, and interest, perhaps they would put together more cohesive teams which would lead to more players being happy regardless of placement. Also, for those players being cut or demoted, if the coaching staff has a good idea which players will not be given offers for the next year, why not speak with the player and parents and let the players practice or play a game or two with the B team to get a feel for the coach and other players on the team? If tryouts are starting in April and early May, there is plenty of time to ease the transition.

Give those top team parents who seem snotty or even malicious a break. They and their kids might have enjoyed their season and are just nervous about not being asked back. It seems petty, but the uncertainty makes normally nice people into idiots. I've been there - on both sides. With so much family time and money at stake, the prospect of having to reestablish new routines and relationships year after year puts everyone on edge. That bitchy mom might be a single mom who depends on her son's top team teammate to drive her son to practice and games. That nervous and distant dad might be best friends with another dad on the team and hopes to continue to hang out during practices and tournament weekends. This stuff isn't just about proving your kid is the greatest u11 player ever or ensuring a path to professional glory.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 10:13     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Agreed, sounds like Arlington since at U14+, you try out separately for CCL (Red and White) and a later tryout for NCSL (Blue). Don't attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance.


McLean has taken that approach too -- ECNL and Green tryouts and selections together, then white (the dreaded stepchild, as it were) separately.


Not understanding McLean tryouts for the older age groups. They are having the second round of try-outs now that the ECNL/Green tryouts are done. And yet they don't actually have a white team for many of these age groups. So are these tryouts for ECNL/Green? Or just Green?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 10:04     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Agreed, sounds like Arlington since at U14+, you try out separately for CCL (Red and White) and a later tryout for NCSL (Blue). Don't attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance.


McLean has taken that approach too -- ECNL and Green tryouts and selections together, then white (the dreaded stepchild, as it were) separately.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 09:58     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Agreed, sounds like Arlington since at U14+, you try out separately for CCL (Red and White) and a later tryout for NCSL (Blue). Don't attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance.


Ignorance or superiority?

The latter. They all derive self worth from child’s rankings.


The parents are the worst and it starts at a very young age---u9 tryouts. I have heard of younger kid parents making fun of lower team parents that bring their kids to DA ID sessions. AS IF?!?!!! But, in their world, where you get labeled at U8 is how you will remain the rest of your development. I mean, a kid really couldn't change from U8 to U12, correct? Toxic.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 09:52     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Agreed, sounds like Arlington since at U14+, you try out separately for CCL (Red and White) and a later tryout for NCSL (Blue). Don't attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance.


Ignorance or superiority?

The latter. They all derive self worth from child’s rankings.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 09:29     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Agreed, sounds like Arlington since at U14+, you try out separately for CCL (Red and White) and a later tryout for NCSL (Blue). Don't attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 09:20     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Just as easily could be Loudoun or Stoddert


A top team parent.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 08:29     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.


Just as easily could be Loudoun or Stoddert
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 08:25     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


What a d@uche. Sounds like an Arlington parent.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 07:49     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.