Anonymous wrote:Pathetic.

When a family member was dealing with cancer their church set up a meal train. Someone thought of the cooler, and the person with a key would take food into the house and put it away. This has happened with every hospital stay and relapse.

Once they were in the clear they returned the favor. I wonder if the family in the post would even consider doing that?

Of course not. Had they provided meals for their neighbors, they would have realized no one else requests food from recipes with high end expensive ingredients. I had to google a bunch of items. It’s not just cheese you would have heard of or found at the grocery, they wanted specialty this, specialty that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Awww...I feel bad for them. They're trying. Somebody mean posted that on the internet.

They should have sent that to a limited audience.

No. Even to a limited audience, that was ridiculous and the height of entitlement. I was in a babysitting co-op 10 years ago here in DC with 25 families. We always provided food for families. The requesting family simply listed any allergies. Links to recipes and directions to leave the food out in a cooler wouldn’t fly for a second, nor would it cross anyone’s mind to do so.

Didn’t the clueless dad also post it on Nextdoor? That’s a public site with a wide audience of total strangers.
They are beyond entitled and ridiculous.

Anonymous wrote:Meal trains are nice, and we always participate...but I would never request or allow one for my family. I politely said "no thanks" when people offered to organize them after I had children or when there was a death in my family. I don't understand why people need them. I mean, order takeout if you don't want to eat a bowl of cereal or microwave something for dinner.

Honestly, I find meal trains for new parents far more egregious than a second baby shower. Rallying folks for meals and laundry (wtf?) for weeks on end is far worse than a baby shower. People like parties and are happy to bring a little gift. Cooking and cleaning however is just nuts.

If someone has end stage cancer or their spouse dies, that's a different story. Although I still wouldn't feel comfortable accepting the help. I always contribute (pretty sure you have to when you are included on the email blast/scheduler), but I always feel like it's a bit of an imposition for the recipient---which is why I imagine some people opt for the outdoor cooler.

Do you really have to contribute, though? I am actively ignoring a meal train sign up that keeps getting emailed to me, and I'm feeling lots of pressure to participate from the meal train organizer, but I really, really don't like the recipient. She's not dying or anything (just a scheduled surgery) and I don't feel like making a meal and bringing it to this woman. She actually made fun of some food I made for a potluck not long ago, so I'm assuming she wouldn't like my food anyway. But I'm also tempted to be passive aggressive and bring her something like meat jello or cheese whiz casserole.

Wow this couple is ridiculous.

I have come to hate meal trains. I’ve participated many times by bringing meals for new parents, parents of a sick or hospitalized child, when there was a loss in the family, etc. but i think I’m done with it. Unless you know the recipients really well and also know what food others have brought them, it’s hard to know what to bring and if it will actually be eaten/enjoyed. Now I just bring a bottle of wine or a gift basket of treats or something instead. I’d never feel comfortable setting one up for myself. I’m not that picky but I would just rather get take out or have a frozen meal from Trader Joe’s than have to coordinate having others drop meals off.

Anonymous wrote:I think a meal train is nice ¯\_(?)_/¯

They went a little over the top with the recipes, but that just seems misguided, not rudely entitled to me. Just because some folks on this board didn't need or want help (or their mothers or grandmothers didn't) doesn't mean that NO ONE deserves help.

I think his request comes off as a bit self centered. He strikes me as someone who hasn't lifted a finger in his life for anyone else and suddenly now that he and his wife are having a baby and things are going to get crazy hectic for them - MEAL TRAIN time.

That is not to say that a casserole or two dropped off by friends/family/neighbors aren't appreciated. But organizing a meal train for yourself complete with recipes? It just seems a little over the top....

Why not take the time to make and freeze some food before the baby is born if this is such a concern for you? Ah well. Another possibility is that he was fully anticipating people to be dropping off dishes that they wouldn't like or stopping by unannounced to offer help....and he was trying to prevent that from happening in the nicest possible way. Better to come across as misguided than ungrateful.

I think a meal train is nice ¯\_(?)_/¯

They went a little over the top with the recipes, but that just seems misguided, not rudely entitled to me. Just because some folks on this board didn't need or want help (or their mothers or grandmothers didn't) doesn't mean that NO ONE deserves help.

I think this guy's meal train was insufferable and obnoxious. Overall though I've both participated and been grateful enough to be the recipient.

Yes, the parents of a preschooler with leukemia weren't themselves sick, they could certainly cook. But how nice to have a hot meal waiting when they got home from the hospital at least a few times per week. It was that much less time and thought they had to put into a part of their lives.

A friend very suddenly lost both parents in an auto accident. Families signing up to bring meals for a week or two, not to mention helping to carpool their kids, allowed the adults to deal with momentous things surrounding such a loss and know that their kids weren't eating pb&j for two weeks. Sometimes just sheer shock and grief can make it hard to function.

Most people I know have good hearts and want to help someone in need. Food is something that nourishes both body and soul (corny, but true). More than once I had a friend want to come see newborn DS, and said they were bringing over lunch or dinner when they came. How nice for me, recovering from a c-section, tired and frustrated from no sleep and trouble getting breastfeeding started. How nice for DH, to come home from work and be able to hang with me and the baby instead of grocery shopping and making dinner. Again, we would have survived but what a nice thing for someone to do.

Love how he posts this along with a picture of his wife and of himself with his face completely covered by a Santa beard.

Dude.....

I often bring meals to people I know with new babies, but a meal train is overkill. They had a baby, they aren't incapacitated or ill. And those requests are just nuts. No way would I sign up for that.