Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.

The gap is $40,000 or more per year. The student cannot take out that much in loans without the parents taking the loans on themselves.

Then be it. My parents didn’t pay for my college. I had a mix of scholarships and loans.

This is such an UMC problem, stressing about paying full price of college.

DH and I both had loans. We both paid off our loans shortly after getting married. We somehow survived. We can easily pay for our three children’s college, grad school, weddings, down payments and vacations.

I had Ivy League education debt. I would not recommend it for some second tier private school.

No undergraduate degree, Ivy or otherwise, is worth over $100,000 in loans.

OP's kid has other options that involve no loans, or limited loans. "So be it" is not sound financial advice.

My $100k debt was worth it 20 years ago. Granted that included grad school. Undergrad was mostly scholarships.

I would argue the college you attend is vastly important. I met many amazing people in Boston, my spouse especially. I made six figures at my first job. DH now earns 7 figures.

Apples and zebras. Grad school is a different animal altogether. I took out loans for law school and it was worth it at that time, in that context, for the job that I got right after graduating.

Six figures for undergrad alone (and OP's kid would be looking at $160K or so, which is the gap between what she can pay and what an elite school costs) is insane no matter what.

The data make it clear that the college you attend is not "vastly important" unless you come from poverty.

The data also make it clear that significant student debt hampers your ability to get ahead in adulthood - to marry, have children, save for retirement, buy a house. That is a fact.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/dianahembree/2018/11/01/new-report-finds-student-debt-burden-has-disastrous-domino-effect-on-millions-of-americans/#2836da0112d1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.

The gap is $40,000 or more per year. The student cannot take out that much in loans without the parents taking the loans on themselves.

Then be it. My parents didn’t pay for my college. I had a mix of scholarships and loans.

This is such an UMC problem, stressing about paying full price of college.

DH and I both had loans. We both paid off our loans shortly after getting married. We somehow survived. We can easily pay for our three children’s college, grad school, weddings, down payments and vacations.

I had Ivy League education debt. I would not recommend it for some second tier private school.

No undergraduate degree, Ivy or otherwise, is worth over $100,000 in loans.

OP's kid has other options that involve no loans, or limited loans. "So be it" is not sound financial advice.

My $100k debt was worth it 20 years ago. Granted that included grad school. Undergrad was mostly scholarships.

I would argue the college you attend is vastly important. I met many amazing people in Boston, my spouse especially. I made six figures at my first job. DH now earns 7 figures.

You have at least one third of your total savings in real estate, and those properties both carry mortgages. Your overall financial vulnerability is there. Sell the rental and ideally downsize your primary residence no matter what other decisions you make on college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.

The gap is $40,000 or more per year. The student cannot take out that much in loans without the parents taking the loans on themselves.

Then be it. My parents didn’t pay for my college. I had a mix of scholarships and loans.

This is such an UMC problem, stressing about paying full price of college.

DH and I both had loans. We both paid off our loans shortly after getting married. We somehow survived. We can easily pay for our three children’s college, grad school, weddings, down payments and vacations.

I had Ivy League education debt. I would not recommend it for some second tier private school.

No undergraduate degree, Ivy or otherwise, is worth over $100,000 in loans.

OP's kid has other options that involve no loans, or limited loans. "So be it" is not sound financial advice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I read that right that you gave 6k in 529?

You can’t afford to pay for it. That is the answer. Don’t feel bad about it.

What kind of special education costs 35k?

They have a second house with $600k in equity. That is where the college savings are located.

Did she state that somewhere?

Well the she should sell the house if that was the purpose of the house. All financial issues solved.

If your DC goes to a school because of special needs, it is important to look at the colleges with an additional lens. You need to meet with the Office of Student Disability when your tour schools and figure out which ones would be a good fit and provide appropriate support. It may be that the in state school is the one, but don’t rule out a private more expensive school if its OSD is far superior. You have enough money saved in the second home. Academic fit and cost are still factors, but disability support is equal to both too.

Anonymous wrote:Did I read that right that you gave 6k in 529?

You can’t afford to pay for it. That is the answer. Don’t feel bad about it.

What kind of special education costs 35k?

They have a second house with $600k in equity. That is where the college savings are located.

Did I read that right that you gave 6k in 529?

You can’t afford to pay for it. That is the answer. Don’t feel bad about it.

What kind of special education costs 35k?

It is smarter and better for your children to have them pay off some student loans than be burdened with helping you pay for your retirement in the future.

If you insist on paying, I would stop finding retirement and save that cash to pay for gap. When younger goes to college, you can either sell your rental or downsize.

Pp again. We send our kids to public school. We know some families who stretch their finances to pay for private schools during primary and secondary school years. We can afford private but saving it for their future.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.

The gap is $40,000 or more per year. The student cannot take out that much in loans without the parents taking the loans on themselves.

Then be it. My parents didn’t pay for my college. I had a mix of scholarships and loans.

This is such an UMC problem, stressing about paying full price of college.

DH and I both had loans. We both paid off our loans shortly after getting married. We somehow survived. We can easily pay for our three children’s college, grad school, weddings, down payments and vacations.

I had Ivy League education debt. I would not recommend it for some second tier private school.

Have you ever used the retirement calculator at firecalc.org? It lets you really drill into expenses and income -- much more so than other retirement calculators. You have a lot saved for retirement (you also have a lot of expenses that either won't go away, or may go up). I understand your concern about not overspending on college. I'd run your numbers through firecalc using different income/expense/age scenarios so you can get a sense of where you're really at right now.

Anonymous wrote:This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.

The gap is $40,000 or more per year. The student cannot take out that much in loans without the parents taking the loans on themselves.

Anonymous wrote:Sell the rental property and use the proceeds for college expenses. Or just sell the rental property already. $5000 a year in profit isn’t worth it.

+1

This seems so simple. You pay what you saved. Your child can take out loans for gap. Don’t mess up your retirement to pay for their college. Medical bills will unlikely go down. Pay off their loans later if you are in the financial position to do so.

I don’t think you should discourage child from going to the college he wants.