Anonymous wrote:So strange that EVERYONE on DCUM suddenly has horrible, racist, intolerant in-laws after the election. Strange they didn't before. Maybe OP is the intolerant one.

Yes, you probably are my sister in law... Thanks for illuminating my dilemma.

Anonymous wrote:So strange that EVERYONE on DCUM suddenly has horrible, racist, intolerant in-laws after the election. Strange they didn't before. Maybe OP is the intolerant one.

Fascinating theory, PP. Do you really think this JUST started? Read the original post. It's been decades. You must be my sister in law.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you hosting every occasion? Host 2 (including birthdays) a year. Then visit the elderly in-laws with your nuclear family alone for the rest of them.

Also, definitely have separate celebrations with your kids, friends, and your side of the family. Your husband's family shouldn't get every holiday/special occasion.

That's my point. Read the original post. My friends are with their families. My family is gone. See above. My kid does come over. It is just him. My point is- there aren't other options or other people would be there, too.

Anonymous wrote:serve them some magic brownies

Lol.

Didn’t read all the comments but I commend you for supporting your husband’s family relationship.

Maybe meet out for some meals to make them less work on you and less time. Or do potluck so your effort is minimized.

serve them some magic brownies

Anonymous wrote:So strange that EVERYONE on DCUM suddenly has horrible, racist, intolerant in-laws after the election. Strange they didn't before. Maybe OP is the intolerant one.

No, not OP, my my relatives were racist and intolerant before, but they had better manners than to talk about racist stuff at holiday gatherings. Other times, sure they would. After the election, they started considering it to be ok during holidays. Not exactly sure why.

I would continue to host your MIL and FIL OP. You've done it this long, and it sounds like they may not be around much longer. I would host for probably whatever two holidays you consider the "most important" for your in laws, and then let the extended family know you aren't planning to host for the other holidays anymore, but will host for these. Time for them to step up and find someone disability accessible to host, or even go over to their parents house and host the festivities there--do the set up, clean up, and cooking so MIL and FIL don't have to.

I find it easier to be busy with hosting tasks, so I don't have to talk to certain people as much. It really helps.

Why are you hosting every occasion? Host 2 (including birthdays) a year. Then visit the elderly in-laws with your nuclear family alone for the rest of them.

Also, definitely have separate celebrations with your kids, friends, and your side of the family. Your husband's family shouldn't get every holiday/special occasion.