Our family.

I once was part of a convo where friend A told friend B that she was envious of friend B for being a mother to one bc that’s what she wanted but wasn’t confident enough to not fold to the pressure of two.

The mother of one said she loved being a mother of one but felt ppl thought she was selfish for having a nice set up where they traveled a lot and had a small family.

Lesson is: life is complicated and all choices have upsides and downsides!

Yes, in dc, many. Older moms, smaller houses. It’s part of the deal.

Yeah. Basically everyone I know with one kid only wanted one kid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me as well! Had her relatively young (31)

Lol 31 young lol

NP. Well... if you're a Fertile Myrtle, you could potentially crank out about 12 more kids after that one at 31. And if you had problems, you'd have a decade to try to get pregnant with a second. So yeah, it's young enough where age related fertility concerns would likely not be the determining factor in a decision to try for a second kid.

My sister. Since we were teens she has only wanted one kid.

Yes, I know quite a few of them. Most of the moms were young and healthy enough to have a second (or at least try) and the couples could have afforded it but they were one and done.

Anonymous wrote:Me as well! Had her relatively young (31)

Lol 31 young lol

Me. I didn’t enjoy pregnancy, birth is terrible, our daughter 5 so far is bright, kind, healthy, we have plenty of money, it’s easier to go on vacations, it’s easier to trade off to get exercise etc., when she has a play date we get an actual break. DH and I have never been close to our sibs. Don’t want more.

Anonymous wrote:Me. Only wanted one. I was 32 when she was born.

Same here. I never wanted any kids, but acquiesced, and once I had one, I wasn't sure whether I might want another. However, the adjustment to parenthood was hard for me, hard with busy careers, and hard on our marriage. We have been coming up for air recently with an elementary-aged kid, and it's much more manageable. But the farther we get away from the early years, the less I want to go back. It's a lot of fun now. And so, we're content with one. Also lots of onlies at her school, so she doesn't feel too out of place.

My bff, so I know they did want just one and not that they can’t have another. Her DH is estranged from his only sibling and I think it played into their decision.

Me. Only wanted one. I was 32 when she was born.

I just have one. I tell people that I really only wanted one, and I'm very happy with just the one etc. But actually it is because my partner was very adamant about not having another child, so much so they had sterilization surgery. I still desperately want another child and every time someone asks about it or tries to convince me I might change my mind it is seriously like a knife in the heart. I wish people would stop asking this stuff at random.

But very happy to hear some people in this thread are happy with their onlies, it gives me some hope.

I have several friends who have explicitly stated that they are only having one kid- it’s their choice and I get their perspective.

I’m an Only that always only wanted one kid. And I have one kid. Im sure people think it’s because of age and infertility. But we still have an embryo on ice. So we could have another if we wanted to. But we are a perfect family of three.

I did have some pangs of having another child, but I’m sure it was hormonal. It was the year after I quit breastfeeding that baby fever hit me. But i knew one is what is best for us emotionally and financially.

If anyone stumbles across this thread and is worried about all the “bad” things associated with Only children, read One and Only. Research show Onlies are the same as or better than children with siblings.

https://www.amazon.com/One-Only-Freedom-Having-Child/dp/1451626967/ref=asc_df_1451626967/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312734685832&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=5006524725142466413&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9008149&hvtargid=pla-449743653769&psc=1