Anonymous wrote:Does your son thinking it was horseplay plus bad luck or does he think the other kid behaved inappropriately?

I can guarantee you that the other guy didn’t want to be touched and saw OP’s son as provoking him into a fight.

Your son needs to learn to keep his hands to himself. I wouldn’t be surprised if both kids are expelled.

Anonymous wrote:My son is in college; he is 18. He lives in a dorm and was screwing around with kids in his dorm; he touched another kid's head, then did it again and the other kid punched him in the face and broke his jaw. This was not a fight, just teens screwing around. There was no alcohol involved. I'm not sure how to handle this. My son goes to school OOS, I do not know this other kid. My son went to the ED, had a CAT scan and will be followed up by a specialist. This will likely be rather expensive. I don't know if we should have him call the police and file a report, or just try to contact the other kid's parents. I'm inclined to not just let this go. WWYD? Thanks.

If it was not a fight, why would you consider a police report? If it was kids screwing around and no alcohol (you understand the skepticism here right?) you are presumably regarding the injury as essentially accidental.

Thinking back to college, I had a friend who developed thyroid cancer in our junior year, a guy I dated previously got drunk and fell off a balcony breaking HIS jaw, I broke a wrist horsing around with friends, somebody else I knew had an emergency appendectomy, another friend had a nasty case of mono and spent a month in bed, one guy (who always skipped breakfast) actually was diagnosed with scurvy. Nobody's parents flew out. Everyone had health insurance (the school required proof and if not you have to pay into their student health insurance policy).

Does your son thinking it was horseplay plus bad luck or does he think the other kid behaved inappropriately?

Anonymous wrote:NP here. I agree you need to go to help your son.

How or whether you ultimately decide to move forward, 1) I'm surprised the school isn't already investigating or has a report on file. A kid was injured in the dorm seriously enough to be taken to the ER.

2) What's the other kid's reaction? Is he remorseful? It sounds like horseplay that got out of hand. A normal reaction would be regret and guilt that someone was seriously injured.

+1

Something is definitely up with the other kid. I am being nice here. OP, call a lawyer while you let the school investigate. That kid might be a huge liability - if he doesn't know how to control his temper, and poses a potential problem (which it certainly seems) he does not belong at college. In no world is it okay to over react with violence. The kid might have big problems, I suspect.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time I submit a health insurance claim the form asks me if it was a result of an accident or other injury. Isn’t this why?

No, that’s for workmans comp.

Nope.

Anonymous wrote:Every time I submit a health insurance claim the form asks me if it was a result of an accident or other injury. Isn’t this why?

No, that’s for workmans comp.

NP here. I agree you need to go to help your son.

How or whether you ultimately decide to move forward, 1) I'm surprised the school isn't already investigating or has a report on file. A kid was injured in the dorm seriously enough to be taken to the ER.

2) What's the other kid's reaction? Is he remorseful? It sounds like horseplay that got out of hand. A normal reaction would be regret and guilt that someone was seriously injured.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP people are being mean as usual. You don’t really know what happened but you will find out when you get there. I feel for your son. I’m very sorry you are going through this.

+1

You might want to bring it up in university court. It sounds like the other kid used excessive force and needs counseling, at the very last, to control his temper. I would suggest suspension. No words or actions necessitate breaking someone's jaw. Have you talked to a lawyer in that geographical area yet? Might be worth getting a couple of legal opinions. You do not want that other kid thinking it is okay to break people's jaws - his parents failed him. If he thinks he can break people's jaws, what could possibly be next. He needs help. This isn't preschool, it's college - you don't go around beating people up.

This +1000. Incident should be handled by school's admin structure (RA, dean of students, uni court). Whatever your son's role in this, it does seem like the other kid's reaction was over the top. And 18 yo boys do very stupid things. Go see your son. Help him with medical appointments, etc. Broken jaws are no fun (I broke mine at 15 after falling off a bike); depending on the treaments used, he may have limited ability to talk and to eat. Make sure he can find liquid and soft foods.
Good luck.

Just imagining as the mother of daughters, what would likely happen if some 18 year old guy kept touching my daughter on any part of her body and she punched him then got brought up to J board. Trust me, I’d have 509+ female protestors outside that hearing. People of any gender have a right to not be touched against their will. OP’s son needs to learn boundaries and consent. Better now than when fired from his first real job or banned from his apartment building.

Make sure you get him to a good doctor. I hope you’re there with him now.

What does your son want relative to "justice"? If he feels ok abut the situation and you can afford it, I'd just pay up.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I'd be upset too but presumably you have health insurance so you're just on the hook for co-pays. It's not worth suing that kid or his family for co-pays. Forget the money. Get it fixed with the best medical attention and advise your son to stay away from this guy.

Wow! Are you posting this from 1990? That's how my mom thinks insurance works, too. A lot of people have coinsurance, deductibles, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP people are being mean as usual. You don’t really know what happened but you will find out when you get there. I feel for your son. I’m very sorry you are going through this.

+1

You might want to bring it up in university court. It sounds like the other kid used excessive force and needs counseling, at the very last, to control his temper. I would suggest suspension. No words or actions necessitate breaking someone's jaw. Have you talked to a lawyer in that geographical area yet? Might be worth getting a couple of legal opinions. You do not want that other kid thinking it is okay to break people's jaws - his parents failed him. If he thinks he can break people's jaws, what could possibly be next. He needs help. This isn't preschool, it's college - you don't go around beating people up.

This +1000. Incident should be handled by school's admin structure (RA, dean of students, uni court). Whatever your son's role in this, it does seem like the other kid's reaction was over the top. And 18 yo boys do very stupid things. Go see your son. Help him with medical appointments, etc. Broken jaws are no fun (I broke mine at 15 after falling off a bike); depending on the treaments used, he may have limited ability to talk and to eat. Make sure he can find liquid and soft foods.
Good luck.

Every time I submit a health insurance claim the form asks me if it was a result of an accident or other injury. Isn’t this why?

Your son in college has a broken jaw and you are not there to help him?