Anonymous
03/13/2019 00:34
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
People like you, who can't teach a kid about disappointment and failure, just got caught in the college admission scandal. Who is the idiot?
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/12/us/college-admissions-cheating-scandal.html
Pick your battles – you don’t have to make a big to-do about making sure your child knows he was rejected from an early grade. They don’t understand the importance and it’s not critical for them to know they were rejected. You’re the parent, you can keep the info age-appropriate. For older children, find a way to articulate what happened in a way they can understand, like “just too many kids this year.”
What's the difference between "too many kids" and "you didn't get in this year"? It's just a fact. If they want to ask why, you can explain to them all the factors. Schools don't just consider each individual, they look at the big picture, they think about how to build their own institution (financial issues), etc. All the better they learn this before the college admissions process. They probably don't even care, it's just an opportunity to explain how much luck and contingency is involved. It's healthy to have that talk so that if it comes up in their friend circles they'll have a grounded view of what this hoopla actually means.
Anonymous
03/13/2019 00:24
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
What are you going to do, lie? Hide the envelope? Block the screen? Unplug the wifi when your kid logs into Ravenna?
This made me laugh...Ravenna! It’s on their phone.
Anonymous
03/12/2019 22:07
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
If the child is in K or 1st, sure. But if we're talking about a middle or high school student, I disagree. This is a good moment to model grace in the face of rejection. There will be many other moments in life when we're disappointed by the way things turn out. It's a fact of life. We face our feelings, and we do our best do figure out what next. Great opportunity to show your child that their successes and failures don't equal who they are -- their values do.
+1
Anonymous
03/12/2019 21:57
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
People like you, who can't teach a kid about disappointment and failure, just got caught in the college admission scandal. Who is the idiot?
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/12/us/college-admissions-cheating-scandal.html
Pick your battles – you don’t have to make a big to-do about making sure your child knows he was rejected from an early grade. They don’t understand the importance and it’s not critical for them to know they were rejected. You’re the parent, you can keep the info age-appropriate. For older children, find a way to articulate what happened in a way they can understand, like “just too many kids this year.”
Anonymous
03/12/2019 21:52
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
For one of my kids who didn’t get in anywhere for pre-K, we just didn’t say anything about rejection. We told him we picked our local public school.
Anonymous
03/12/2019 20:23
Subject: Re:Telling your child they were rejected
Remind that the school isn't really rejecting them -- especially with the young kids, the schools don't even have reliable ways of measuring their aptitude. Underscore for them that the schools are glorified country clubs and what they're really rejecting are the parents.
Anonymous
03/12/2019 20:18
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
If the child is in K or 1st, sure. But if we're talking about a middle or high school student, I disagree. This is a good moment to model grace in the face of rejection. There will be many other moments in life when we're disappointed by the way things turn out. It's a fact of life. We face our feelings, and we do our best do figure out what next. Great opportunity to show your child that their successes and failures don't equal who they are -- their values do.
Anonymous
03/12/2019 19:53
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
People like you, who can't teach a kid about disappointment and failure, just got caught in the college admission scandal. Who is the idiot?
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/12/us/college-admissions-cheating-scandal.html
There's a long thread in the college discussion forum, but wanted to say here that this scandal is HUGE and shows just how corrupt this country has become.
Anonymous
03/12/2019 15:59
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
What are you going to do, lie? Hide the envelope? Block the screen? Unplug the wifi when your kid logs into Ravenna?
Anonymous
03/12/2019 14:40
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
People like you, who can't teach a kid about disappointment and failure, just got caught in the college admission scandal. Who is the idiot?
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/12/us/college-admissions-cheating-scandal.html
Anonymous
03/03/2019 05:45
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
Have a strong opinion, do you? Believe there’s only one way to do this?
Important discussion should occur before the results came out. I made sure my DC realized that there are lots of great kids applying for a relatively small number of slots and a lot of it has to do with luck or make up of the current class. Set expectations low to begin with so with results come in, the child doesn’t take it too personally if they were not expected somewhere.
Accepted!
I meant..
Anonymous
03/03/2019 05:44
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
Have a strong opinion, do you? Believe there’s only one way to do this?
Important discussion should occur before the results came out. I made sure my DC realized that there are lots of great kids applying for a relatively small number of slots and a lot of it has to do with luck or make up of the current class. Set expectations low to begin with so with results come in, the child doesn’t take it too personally if they were not expected somewhere.
Anonymous
03/03/2019 02:02
Subject: Telling your child they were rejected
Anonymous wrote:Idiot. You don’t. You say we thought it over and we think this other school is a better fit for you and our family. Never tell a kid they didn’t get in!
Have a strong opinion, do you? Believe there’s only one way to do this?