We moved a neighborhood over between K and 1st for exactly this problem, and small differences in the school made big differences in my child’s experience. More choice time (rather than none!), more differentiation for reading, more lessons absorbed into projects rather than worksheets, slightly smaller classes — those all made the difference between a crazed kid and a happy kid.

My caveat is that I knew well how my child operated based on prior experiences, and I researched schools a decent amount, including a classroom visit to a target school.

DCPSs do have different personalities, despite the common curriculum, but most kids aren’t so sensitive to these minor differences.

Does she like playing with other kids? Does your aftercare have a lot of unstructured play and playground time? If so, it might acutally make sense to have her in an hour or two of aftercare just to run around and hang out with other kids.

Go to a Montessori

PP here. The silent lunch thing is odd. I know my daughter talks so much to one girl the teacher sometimes separates them at lunch but that’s the extent of it. How big are the classrooms? A small room can be sensory overload to a lot of kids. No chance for quiet time or personal
Space.

My daughter is in K at Bruce Monroe and she loves it. I think you need to understand what “play based” means and the age. In her class they do almost all their work on the floor or in moveable seats around the room so no kids are stuck at the table for long periods of times. Morning circle which is songs, reading together and individually, art projects, etc. lots of movement. Recess every day and a special every day. I know they do play time at various stations around the room they can choose from too. I think a key component is just letting the kids move around a lot. They were working on math stuff the other day but kids were sitting or laying on the floor while they worked on them.

OP, I just read this thread wondering if I had written it. My daughter is also in K at CMI (I probably know you!) and has also been getting increasingly anxious this year. I think the silent lunch and color-coded public behavior chart has a lot to do with it--she seems very concerned about whether she is "bad." It really sucks. I have reached out to the school social worker and she is going to try to talk with her, although she seems very overwhelmed so I don't have high hopes for that.

My school also has first ten minutes silent lunch- but then the kids are released for recess immediately afterwards. My DS, along with a few buddies, actually bring books for the silent part of lunch. (Although they often share them later- think Guinness book of Records, Hazardous Tales)

We left a HRCS that was experiential for a DCPS. Ironically we find there is continual movement and center based learning so not just sitting, or gathering on the rug. We are lucky this year to have a younger teacher who got funding for flexible seating (stand up table; bouncy chairs; tatami mats etc.)

DC was so unhappy at the HRCS comparatively- it had more to do with the teachers rather than anything else. (Only hindsight can show this. After we left, that teacher was removed from the classroom.)

Good luck. Like others stated, the Pediatrician and Counselors are good starting points.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are in APS and kids don’t sit in desks all day until 2nd. Where are you?

This is the DC public schools board.

My kid is in first grade at DCPS, and her class doesn't sit at their desks all day. AFAICT, they also don't lose recess time as a punishment, or have silent lunches, or use behavior charts. I think this is less about "DC schools are all too structured and academic in kindergarten" and more this particular school is not a good fit for my kid."

Sounds Awesome, what dcps? Is this school wide or just her class? I would like to find more dcps like this for my lottery list.

Ross is like this and as a small school would probably be good for OP's child, but you'd almost certainly need to be in bounds to get in for 1st.

My daughter is in K at Bruce Monroe and is very fidgety and active but she has done great at the school, they spend a lot of time at play and art stations or sitting on the floor. They do some dancing breaks too throughout the day. Very rarely sitting at tables unless they are working on an art project. Lots of recess time too.

Montessori mom here. I recommend checking out Shining Stars Montessori, Breakthrough, Lee or any of the others. My kid has been at SSMA for the last two years and despite some of the drama you might read about going on at the school, my kid has thrived. While there aren't "toys" - all of the learning supplies are hands-on and they move around the classroom between the floor and tables throughout the day. Sounds like your child might be a great fit for such an environment. My kid also is allowed to bring some toys in her backpack to play with and share with her friends during aftercare.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure that exists in DC. Not even in the private schools, really, at least not by 1st grade.

That was my concern...

Actually the non-parochial independent schools have a lot of free time / recess / creative time in all the early grades.

OP, have you looked into financial aid at these schools? Sheridan, Lowell, CHDS, Beauvoir, Burgundy....some have more financial aid than others.

So does CMI but OP’s kid is still struggling. Honestly OP, I do think you should have her assessed by a psychologists. Sounds like something deeper than not having enough recess at school.

As a psychologist, I would never try to suggest you shouldn't raise concerns with your ped or a psychologist if you are concerned about anxiety. But as a parent of a kindergartner who is in VA public schools, I share all of your concerns and while there are some variations across schools (e.g., no silent lunch at my son's school) the overall environment is the same in all public schools these days. LOTS of assessments, lots of desk work, minimal outdoor time (if at all in the winter months), and limited time for socialization or support for social and emotional learning. All kids handle transitions differently and some kids are more sensitive to these types of environments than others. Most will end up adjusting just fine - as it sounds to me like your daughter probably will eventually too. But whether these are the appropriate environments for 5 and 6 year olds and whether this is really the environments that optimize our kids learning and growing is a question we all need to start asking sooner rather than later. Very little of what happens in early elementary classrooms tracks with what's developmentally appropriate or optimal for kids. You should certainly raise concerns with your child's teacher and school, but my guess is that this is a general philosophical difference with public education rather than a school specific issue.

It seems like you've gotten some good advice from others on here, but I think Montessori could potentially be a good fit. It's not more "playtime" exactly (especially not in 1st grade), but it is a lot more freedom to work on what she wants, not sit at a desk all day, and not be rushed from activity to activity - lingering on the things she's most interested in.

We have a friend who was at Two Rivers Young, and despite the school's reputation was not happy there. She moved to Lee, and has loved school this year - noting to her parents that she actually got to work on things she chose and being less structured.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure that exists in DC. Not even in the private schools, really, at least not by 1st grade.

That was my concern...

Actually the non-parochial independent schools have a lot of free time / recess / creative time in all the early grades.

OP, have you looked into financial aid at these schools? Sheridan, Lowell, CHDS, Beauvoir, Burgundy....some have more financial aid than others.

So does CMI but OP’s kid is still struggling. Honestly OP, I do think you should have her assessed by a psychologists. Sounds like something deeper than not having enough recess at school.

I'm the PP and we agree that OP's child may benefit from an independent assessment of the psycho-social factors. But. CMI has nowhere near the true free time every day, week in, week out, as the progressive lower schools that do no standardized testing. It's not even close. That's a major reason parents choose these schools - because they have 3-4 recesses at day, PULS studio art and/or music, PLUS phys ed, PLUS social lunch times that are joyous and talkative. At the school on this list that I know best, the elementary kids don't even sit at desks to do their independent work (they flop on the floor, couch, whatever).

Public behavior charts and other fun shaming techniques from the 1950s are unheard of.

Anyway, OP, financial aid can make these places a reality. But please do explore the possibility that your daughter has some anxiety traits that are being triggered by her current setting. Good luck

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are in APS and kids don’t sit in desks all day until 2nd. Where are you?

This is the DC public schools board.

My kid is in first grade at DCPS, and her class doesn't sit at their desks all day. AFAICT, they also don't lose recess time as a punishment, or have silent lunches, or use behavior charts. I think this is less about "DC schools are all too structured and academic in kindergarten" and more this particular school is not a good fit for my kid."

Sounds Awesome, what dcps? Is this school wide or just her class? I would like to find more dcps like this for my lottery list.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure that exists in DC. Not even in the private schools, really, at least not by 1st grade.

That was my concern...

Actually the non-parochial independent schools have a lot of free time / recess / creative time in all the early grades.

OP, have you looked into financial aid at these schools? Sheridan, Lowell, CHDS, Beauvoir, Burgundy....some have more financial aid than others.

So does CMI but OP’s kid is still struggling. Honestly OP, I do think you should have her assessed by a psychologists. Sounds like something deeper than not having enough recess at school.

Agree. It could even be that OP's child has a learning disability -- a neuropsychologist will look for indicators of dyslexia or other learning issues, even in a 6 yo. Kids who don't like school are often kids who have underlying issues. In particularly bright students learning issues can go undetected for longer because they are able to absorb what they need to in the early years.