A friend got divorced from her husband who was a drunk, and she had lots of proof of his heavy, daily drinking (but he had no DWIs). The day he got served he stopped drinking, started going to AA, and didn't have another drink until the children were grown. I think one cause of the drinking was my friend, who is a difficult woman.

When you can, buy gift cards to places you regularly shop like Giant or Target. Keep them in a safe place (or with a trusted relative or friend) to use if things get tight.

If he wants to be more than a weekend dad then he’ll probably get it. You will pay him child support so he can afford a place large enough to have children. You probably won’t pay him alimony. That is pretty uncommon now unless one was a SAH parent and then it’s usually only for a certain amount of time.