Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a saying for this, passed on from FIL I never met, who used to say to my DH when he was a kid...”Bobby, don’t do one job and make two as a result”. In your case OP, “don’t do one job and make a dozen plus a trip to ER, as a result”

Holy Fck I’d lose my sh*t daily. If that makes me controlling, then I wear that badge!

If he’s a great dad and great lover than there’s that. Does he function well in his career? Financially an equal? If not, I don’t know what to advise. I mean wow, don’t think I could stick with it, but my DS is almost off to college. The chicken juice is a real deal breaker! Feel bad for you, of course, but so much for him. Can’t imagine he does this with malicious intent, which means he’s unaware and that could signal something. I never throw a diagnosis at things, but he sounds like ADD combined hyper/inattentive. Drug him up!

Op here. Yes, he’s exceptional at his career, and he is financially stable. He just has his very narrow areas of focus where he excels, and practically handicapped in everything else. It is both a choice on his part, and also just how he’s built. He has very few priorities that he will choose to focus on, while everything else quite literally seems to disappear for him. He depends on me to make his daily life work, but he’s very successful and capable in other areas of his life.

And he most definitely does not have add or adhd. He absolutely has an atypical brain with all kinds of crazy quirks, but I’ve never come across any diagnosis or condition that fits him.

How do you know or why do you keep saying he does not have ADD?

I’d bet $1m he does. He sounds just like my overeducated husband who excels at his hyper focus (his career), has no common sense, can’t listen well or remember anything well, and is constantly suffering from mistakes and setbacks outside of work. He comes from a whole family of STEM phds, all or whine had adhd inattentive. All of his uncles and cousins have been divorced or never sustained a relationship long enough to marry. I don’t know how my MIL did it with a spouse and two adhd boys. It is loonytown visiting them as my young kids almost get hit by their reparking car, doors slammed on their fingers, bathtubs left filled w water, sharp knives left out.

Because we are both familiar with adhd. He diagnoses and treats adhd.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does he have ADHD? Do you have a house cleaner?

Can we please stop the "does he have ADHD?" bullshit line? It's getting tired. It's as tired as "I'm fat because of my hormones" and "If your DW won't have sex with you, then you need to help clean up and take care of the kids". None of those responses are helpful at all. Sometimes it's best not to comment at all.

Yes yes yes yes. Can't agree enough.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does he have ADHD? Do you have a house cleaner?

Can we please stop the "does he have ADHD?" bullshit line? It's getting tired. It's as tired as "I'm fat because of my hormones" and "If your DW won't have sex with you, then you need to help clean up and take care of the kids". None of those responses are helpful at all. Sometimes it's best not to comment at all.

Anonymous wrote:There is a very well known doctor with ADHD in the DMV who diagnosed and treats ADHDs. But everyone, including the parents of his patients, knows he has ADHD. He is a very good doctor which is why people tolerates with very late reports (or none) and other things that makes them crazy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a saying for this, passed on from FIL I never met, who used to say to my DH when he was a kid...”Bobby, don’t do one job and make two as a result”. In your case OP, “don’t do one job and make a dozen plus a trip to ER, as a result”

Holy Fck I’d lose my sh*t daily. If that makes me controlling, then I wear that badge!

If he’s a great dad and great lover than there’s that. Does he function well in his career? Financially an equal? If not, I don’t know what to advise. I mean wow, don’t think I could stick with it, but my DS is almost off to college. The chicken juice is a real deal breaker! Feel bad for you, of course, but so much for him. Can’t imagine he does this with malicious intent, which means he’s unaware and that could signal something. I never throw a diagnosis at things, but he sounds like ADD combined hyper/inattentive. Drug him up!

Op here. Yes, he’s exceptional at his career, and he is financially stable. He just has his very narrow areas of focus where he excels, and practically handicapped in everything else. It is both a choice on his part, and also just how he’s built. He has very few priorities that he will choose to focus on, while everything else quite literally seems to disappear for him. He depends on me to make his daily life work, but he’s very successful and capable in other areas of his life.

And he most definitely does not have add or adhd. He absolutely has an atypical brain with all kinds of crazy quirks, but I’ve never come across any diagnosis or condition that fits him.

How do you know or why do you keep saying he does not have ADD?

I’d bet $1m he does. He sounds just like my overeducated husband who excels at his hyper focus (his career), has no common sense, can’t listen well or remember anything well, and is constantly suffering from mistakes and setbacks outside of work. He comes from a whole family of STEM phds, all or whine had adhd inattentive. All of his uncles and cousins have been divorced or never sustained a relationship long enough to marry. I don’t know how my MIL did it with a spouse and two adhd boys. It is loonytown visiting them as my young kids almost get hit by their reparking car, doors slammed on their fingers, bathtubs left filled w water, sharp knives left out.

Because we are both familiar with adhd. He diagnoses and treats adhd.

Well then OP, you’ve extinguished that diagnosis lol! Could it be sympathy symptoms since he deals with it everyday? Much like ghost pain in twins. Are there any psychiatrists in this thread that can address this? We want to help OP!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a saying for this, passed on from FIL I never met, who used to say to my DH when he was a kid...”Bobby, don’t do one job and make two as a result”. In your case OP, “don’t do one job and make a dozen plus a trip to ER, as a result”

Holy Fck I’d lose my sh*t daily. If that makes me controlling, then I wear that badge!

If he’s a great dad and great lover than there’s that. Does he function well in his career? Financially an equal? If not, I don’t know what to advise. I mean wow, don’t think I could stick with it, but my DS is almost off to college. The chicken juice is a real deal breaker! Feel bad for you, of course, but so much for him. Can’t imagine he does this with malicious intent, which means he’s unaware and that could signal something. I never throw a diagnosis at things, but he sounds like ADD combined hyper/inattentive. Drug him up!

Op here. Yes, he’s exceptional at his career, and he is financially stable. He just has his very narrow areas of focus where he excels, and practically handicapped in everything else. It is both a choice on his part, and also just how he’s built. He has very few priorities that he will choose to focus on, while everything else quite literally seems to disappear for him. He depends on me to make his daily life work, but he’s very successful and capable in other areas of his life.

And he most definitely does not have add or adhd. He absolutely has an atypical brain with all kinds of crazy quirks, but I’ve never come across any diagnosis or condition that fits him.

How do you know or why do you keep saying he does not have ADD?

I’d bet $1m he does. He sounds just like my overeducated husband who excels at his hyper focus (his career), has no common sense, can’t listen well or remember anything well, and is constantly suffering from mistakes and setbacks outside of work. He comes from a whole family of STEM phds, all or whine had adhd inattentive. All of his uncles and cousins have been divorced or never sustained a relationship long enough to marry. I don’t know how my MIL did it with a spouse and two adhd boys. It is loonytown visiting them as my young kids almost get hit by their reparking car, doors slammed on their fingers, bathtubs left filled w water, sharp knives left out.

Because we are both familiar with adhd. He diagnoses and treats adhd.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a saying for this, passed on from FIL I never met, who used to say to my DH when he was a kid...”Bobby, don’t do one job and make two as a result”. In your case OP, “don’t do one job and make a dozen plus a trip to ER, as a result”

Holy Fck I’d lose my sh*t daily. If that makes me controlling, then I wear that badge!

If he’s a great dad and great lover than there’s that. Does he function well in his career? Financially an equal? If not, I don’t know what to advise. I mean wow, don’t think I could stick with it, but my DS is almost off to college. The chicken juice is a real deal breaker! Feel bad for you, of course, but so much for him. Can’t imagine he does this with malicious intent, which means he’s unaware and that could signal something. I never throw a diagnosis at things, but he sounds like ADD combined hyper/inattentive. Drug him up!

Op here. Yes, he’s exceptional at his career, and he is financially stable. He just has his very narrow areas of focus where he excels, and practically handicapped in everything else. It is both a choice on his part, and also just how he’s built. He has very few priorities that he will choose to focus on, while everything else quite literally seems to disappear for him. He depends on me to make his daily life work, but he’s very successful and capable in other areas of his life.

And he most definitely does not have add or adhd. He absolutely has an atypical brain with all kinds of crazy quirks, but I’ve never come across any diagnosis or condition that fits him.

How do you know or why do you keep saying he does not have ADD?

I’d bet $1m he does. He sounds just like my overeducated husband who excels at his hyper focus (his career), has no common sense, can’t listen well or remember anything well, and is constantly suffering from mistakes and setbacks outside of work. He comes from a whole family of STEM phds, all or whine had adhd inattentive. All of his uncles and cousins have been divorced or never sustained a relationship long enough to marry. I don’t know how my MIL did it with a spouse and two adhd boys. It is loonytown visiting them as my young kids almost get hit by their reparking car, doors slammed on their fingers, bathtubs left filled w water, sharp knives left out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a saying for this, passed on from FIL I never met, who used to say to my DH when he was a kid...”Bobby, don’t do one job and make two as a result”. In your case OP, “don’t do one job and make a dozen plus a trip to ER, as a result”

Holy Fck I’d lose my sh*t daily. If that makes me controlling, then I wear that badge!

If he’s a great dad and great lover than there’s that. Does he function well in his career? Financially an equal? If not, I don’t know what to advise. I mean wow, don’t think I could stick with it, but my DS is almost off to college. The chicken juice is a real deal breaker! Feel bad for you, of course, but so much for him. Can’t imagine he does this with malicious intent, which means he’s unaware and that could signal something. I never throw a diagnosis at things, but he sounds like ADD combined hyper/inattentive. Drug him up!

Op here. Yes, he’s exceptional at his career, and he is financially stable. He just has his very narrow areas of focus where he excels, and practically handicapped in everything else. It is both a choice on his part, and also just how he’s built. He has very few priorities that he will choose to focus on, while everything else quite literally seems to disappear for him. He depends on me to make his daily life work, but he’s very successful and capable in other areas of his life.

And he most definitely does not have add or adhd. He absolutely has an atypical brain with all kinds of crazy quirks, but I’ve never come across any diagnosis or condition that fits him.

Anonymous wrote:OP has control issues, OCD, and too many rules.