Op is doing way better than most people! His cars and house are paid off. He appears to have no student loan or consumer debt. He is maxing out his retirement and has FSA. He is setting aside a nice amount of money in his child's 529 every month. He has a SAH wife AND his kid is attending private school.

He and his wife also travel to visit parents and help them out.

Op is doing pretty darned good. Op should be telling DCUM how to do it!

Unless there are significant special needs at play, or your child is very young, pony ride's over for the SAH spouse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it incredibly sad that people are recommending decreasing your donations. You should be able to give $100 a month on a HHI of $140k when you live in a house you’ve inherited.

Are you donate Nazi? You’re entitled to your opinion but it is one legitimate way to decrease expenses. I’m the one who suggesting donating time, instead.

DP. I also suggested that OP cut back on *not eliminate* the donation. I'll say it again, as a fundraiser: $25 a month vs. $100 month is a huge difference to the OP, but a staggeringly negligible difference to the charity. Either $25/month or $100/month "counts" the same to the charity, just about; at that rate, either way, you are a loyal monthly donor. Your value is in the consistency (monthly) and the participation. It's great to say that "we have XXXXXX annual donors in the $10-$500 range." Your value is participatory, so OP can achieve that at $25/month.

Anonymous wrote:I find it incredibly sad that people are recommending decreasing your donations. You should be able to give $100 a month on a HHI of $140k when you live in a house you’ve inherited.

Are you donate Nazi? You’re entitled to your opinion but it is one legitimate way to decrease expenses. I’m the one who suggesting donating time, instead.

How can you save with this breakdown?

If you are maxing out retirement, doing an FSA, funding your child's 529 - you ARE saving.

I don't understand your question. Your house and your cars are even paid off.

If staying out of public school is that high a priority, I would look into parochial schools, which are typically a fraction of the cost of other private schools.

You are 50. How old is your kid? When will your kid start college?

You have no mortgage and no car payments. You should be doing just fine on your salary.

I agree that the private school tuition is steep but since you have no mortgage or car payments even that school tuition should be fairly doable for you.

I think you need to cut back on some of the extraneous expenses - eating out, mow your own lawn, change your own oil, see if you can take steps to reduce your utility usage. $225/month is a lot for classes but part of that is swim therapy for your child - is there anyway that monthly cost can be reduced?

You should break that travel/vacation/haircut/entertainment/gift category down into separate categories to get a better handle on where your money is going.

You can’t afford private school on your income!


The 2k should be going into your brokerage. Not towards tuition.

Safe deposit box is crazy. Who does that anymore?

That's like people with storage units. So dumb. Just get rid of crap.

I find it incredibly sad that people are recommending decreasing your donations. You should be able to give $100 a month on a HHI of $140k when you live in a house you’ve inherited.

Since child is in school full time, why are you waiting until next year for her to get a parting job?

To even say private school isn’t a choice, shows you aren’t easy to cut things. It IS a choice.

Get rid of safe deposit box. They have safes on amazon for about $20. What is in there that you need at a bank?

Stop funding 529.

Stop donating. Your spouse can volunteer if she wants to give back

Shop at Aldi.

The classes and therapy are very high. You can drop some, I’m certain.

Protein powders amount should be reduced or buy a cheaper Brand

100 for household items is a lot for 3 people. A tube of toothpaste, some toilet paper and paper towels, 1-2 bottles of shampoo, one of conditioner, soap, etc doesn’t cost this much for us. Are you buying cheaper brands? Tide pods?
lawn exterior - do it yourself

Cut down on gifts to both your parents

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, given how little you’ve engaged in this discussion, I question how important this really is to you. We can’t make money appear for you, reality is that if you want to save, you need to cut back on your spending. With $142k in annual income and no mortgage, there’s really no excuse not to be saving. You’re just choosing not to because you prefer a more expensive lifestyle than you can afford.

I barely posted today. And came back to respond to the first page of comments. We already do Costco for gas and bulk. The private school is not by choice as I explained. What helped by posting here was the reiteration to cut back or stop the 529 and donations. Also to save the $2K a year on vacations. I am not at all handy around the house but have looked at you tube videos and done several things. But some, just can’t do. Also I have back issues hence the mower. But can certainly do that at a slow pace. Definitely some takeaways for me.

What about the previous question about selling your house and moving to one with better schools?

And the ones about the SAH spouse getting a job?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, given how little you’ve engaged in this discussion, I question how important this really is to you. We can’t make money appear for you, reality is that if you want to save, you need to cut back on your spending. With $142k in annual income and no mortgage, there’s really no excuse not to be saving. You’re just choosing not to because you prefer a more expensive lifestyle than you can afford.

I barely posted today. And came back to respond to the first page of comments. We already do Costco for gas and bulk. The private school is not by choice as I explained. What helped by posting here was the reiteration to cut back or stop the 529 and donations. Also to save the $2K a year on vacations. I am not at all handy around the house but have looked at you tube videos and done several things. But some, just can’t do. Also I have back issues hence the mower. But can certainly do that at a slow pace. Definitely some takeaways for me.

What about the previous question about selling your house and moving to one with better schools?

If private school is that important, then the sah spouse needs to find work to pay for it.