Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 20:46     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:The 14 year old should study at the kitchen table.

They are really just playing on their phones when they say the are studying in their rooms.


Exactly. I find it hard to believe there isn't anywhere else in the house the 14 yo could study.

I grew up in a 2 bedroom farmhouse with 4 sibling and 2 parents (and 1 bathroom!). The only thing we did in the bedroom was sleep (if someone was masturbating, I never knew it. I certainly wasn't). My 3 kids shared a room until the oldest was 10 and then the 2 boys (10 and 7) were in one room and the girl (8) was in another. The only reason she got her own room at that time was because she had some medical issues that were better accommodated in a different room.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 14:55     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
The 14 year old should study at the kitchen table.

They are really just playing on their phones when they say the are studying in their rooms.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 14:31     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you do have the 14 yr old and 6 yr old share a room, you're going to need to figure something out for homework. If the teen retreats to her room to study, does that mean the 6 yr old can't be in the room? If the teen is staying up late to finish a project, can it be done in the living room without anyone disturbing it?

And is there no other way to get a bedroom for each? Not a basement, or part of one, that can be converted into a bedroom for 4 years until the oldest heads off to college?


Kids will survive sharing rooms.

They might even (gasp) remember that time fondly.


Of course they'll survive. But right now I have a 14 year old upstairs in her room freaking out a bit about an exam tomorrow. I can send her to bed with her books and have her freak out quietly & hopefully fall asleep soon. If she had a 6 year old sibling in her room, I'd have to do something else. Certainly possible. But as someone who has a 9th grader who uses her room for studying and school projects, and who honestly doesn't have anywhere else in the house those things could be safely done between siblings and pets, I think it's something that requires consideration that a parent having to deal with "not enough rooms! How do I sort this out?!" might overlook. Especially if the 14 yr old is currently an 8th grader and has had a relatively easy homework load up until now.

If there is a basement or some other option to create another room, I'd ask the 14 yr old her preference. She can share with the 6 yr old and the space can be made into a study for when she needs quiet, or she can use it as her room.

The 10 yr old will always be able to use his room to study if he needs to, or to get away. And the 6 yr old will have a single room by the time she's 10-11, since her older sibling will be off to college. I think it's reasonable to consider options depending on the needs of the 14 yr old in question. If they're coming from each having their own room, I am not optimistic that the 14 yr old will be enthused about sharing a room with a 6 yr old.

I'd be tempted to go against the grain and let the 14 yr old have her own room with the understanding that as soon as she left for college it was going to one of her other siblings. The younger two share, and get their own rooms when the 10 yr old is 14 and the 6 yr old is 10. At that point the youngest girl gets a bunk in her room that the oldest girl crashes on when she comes home to visit. That seems to spread the pain fairly equitably. It means every kid gets a single during their high school years, the oldest kid still has a place to stay when she comes home, and the youngest doesn't make out with a single when she's 10 just because she's the youngest.


The six year old could go to bed in the parents room or 14 year old study in the parents room.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 14:23     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Let the two younger ones share. Then when the oldest leaves at 18, the boy gets his own room for 4 years.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 09:20     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Boy gets his own room.

He’s almost at the age when he will start discovering the joys of masturbation.

Don’t put him in with a girl unless there is absolutely no choice otherwise. He will attempt to jerk off while she’s sleeping at some point.


The poster who finally stopped dancing around the subject and got right to the point.


Girls masturbate, too.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 09:19     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To the last two posters, what was wrong with your parents?

We shared four girls to one room and although we bickered we had none of thos issues you are complaining about.

My kids have shared rooms in various houses we lived in, and again, none of those problems.


I'm the atari guy.
I might need to elaborate on the incident.
So,growing up,I had a ton of blocks.When my brother turned 3,they were his.So one day he made a large tower out of the blocks,and I was in a rush.I tripped over one of the extra blocks that were sitting out,and went head first into the tower.I got up,but he was angry.He had trouble sleeping the night before,and he unleashed his crankiness on me.He threw a large block at me,and I ducked,but it ended up hitting my brand new atari console,damaging the insides beyond repair.


I think you need therapy.

35 years is a long time to hold a grudge over an atari and some blocks.


A grudge, or just a strong memory. And whether it is too long really depends on how his parents handled the incident. I have a small scar on my face from a similar incident with my brother. It is emblematic of how my parents minimized my personal space and favored my bro. So the incident may be more important than it sounds.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 08:22     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:I was the girl between 2 boys - they were 5 years apart and always shared a room. That was middle class life in the 1970s, and no one thought it was an issue.


+1 Life is best when we stop overthinking.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 08:09     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Oldest kid gets their own room. The two younger kids share the bigger non-master bedroom.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 08:03     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Girl boy girl 14 10 6 so Malcolm gets his own room?


Of course. Why is this even a debate?

The teen and preteen girls share the bigger room.

The young elementary boy with the legos, bey blades and "science experiments" gets his own smaller room.


+1 He's outnumbered in the house -- and he's a boy(!) -- of course he has his own room. Fair isn't always 50/50... fair is "you get what you need". The boys and girls need to be separate. That's life.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 07:32     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:Boy gets his own room.

He’s almost at the age when he will start discovering the joys of masturbation.

Don’t put him in with a girl unless there is absolutely no choice otherwise. He will attempt to jerk off while she’s sleeping at some point.


The poster who finally stopped dancing around the subject and got right to the point.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 07:30     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you do have the 14 yr old and 6 yr old share a room, you're going to need to figure something out for homework. If the teen retreats to her room to study, does that mean the 6 yr old can't be in the room? If the teen is staying up late to finish a project, can it be done in the living room without anyone disturbing it?

And is there no other way to get a bedroom for each? Not a basement, or part of one, that can be converted into a bedroom for 4 years until the oldest heads off to college?


Kids will survive sharing rooms.

They might even (gasp) remember that time fondly.


Of course they'll survive. But right now I have a 14 year old upstairs in her room freaking out a bit about an exam tomorrow. I can send her to bed with her books and have her freak out quietly & hopefully fall asleep soon. If she had a 6 year old sibling in her room, I'd have to do something else. Certainly possible. But as someone who has a 9th grader who uses her room for studying and school projects, and who honestly doesn't have anywhere else in the house those things could be safely done between siblings and pets, I think it's something that requires consideration that a parent having to deal with "not enough rooms! How do I sort this out?!" might overlook. Especially if the 14 yr old is currently an 8th grader and has had a relatively easy homework load up until now.

If there is a basement or some other option to create another room, I'd ask the 14 yr old her preference. She can share with the 6 yr old and the space can be made into a study for when she needs quiet, or she can use it as her room.

The 10 yr old will always be able to use his room to study if he needs to, or to get away. And the 6 yr old will have a single room by the time she's 10-11, since her older sibling will be off to college. I think it's reasonable to consider options depending on the needs of the 14 yr old in question. If they're coming from each having their own room, I am not optimistic that the 14 yr old will be enthused about sharing a room with a 6 yr old.

I'd be tempted to go against the grain and let the 14 yr old have her own room with the understanding that as soon as she left for college it was going to one of her other siblings. The younger two share, and get their own rooms when the 10 yr old is 14 and the 6 yr old is 10. At that point the youngest girl gets a bunk in her room that the oldest girl crashes on when she comes home to visit. That seems to spread the pain fairly equitably. It means every kid gets a single during their high school years, the oldest kid still has a place to stay when she comes home, and the youngest doesn't make out with a single when she's 10 just because she's the youngest.


Your 14 year old and any 14 year old would be fine sharing a room, just like most kids in this country and world.

Besides, if your 14 year old plans to attend college, figuring out how to study around other people and less than ideal roommates without freaking out is an exceptionally valuable lesson to learn before she leaves.

You and atari guy should get married.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 07:26     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To the last two posters, what was wrong with your parents?

We shared four girls to one room and although we bickered we had none of thos issues you are complaining about.

My kids have shared rooms in various houses we lived in, and again, none of those problems.


I'm the atari guy.
I might need to elaborate on the incident.
So,growing up,I had a ton of blocks.When my brother turned 3,they were his.So one day he made a large tower out of the blocks,and I was in a rush.I tripped over one of the extra blocks that were sitting out,and went head first into the tower.I got up,but he was angry.He had trouble sleeping the night before,and he unleashed his crankiness on me.He threw a large block at me,and I ducked,but it ended up hitting my brand new atari console,damaging the insides beyond repair.


I think you need therapy.

35 years is a long time to hold a grudge over an atari and some blocks.
Anonymous
Post 06/05/2018 06:07     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Boy gets his own room.

He’s almost at the age when he will start discovering the joys of masturbation.

Don’t put him in with a girl unless there is absolutely no choice otherwise. He will attempt to jerk off while she’s sleeping at some point.
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2018 23:03     Subject: Re:three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you do have the 14 yr old and 6 yr old share a room, you're going to need to figure something out for homework. If the teen retreats to her room to study, does that mean the 6 yr old can't be in the room? If the teen is staying up late to finish a project, can it be done in the living room without anyone disturbing it?

And is there no other way to get a bedroom for each? Not a basement, or part of one, that can be converted into a bedroom for 4 years until the oldest heads off to college?


Kids will survive sharing rooms.

They might even (gasp) remember that time fondly.


Of course they'll survive. But right now I have a 14 year old upstairs in her room freaking out a bit about an exam tomorrow. I can send her to bed with her books and have her freak out quietly & hopefully fall asleep soon. If she had a 6 year old sibling in her room, I'd have to do something else. Certainly possible. But as someone who has a 9th grader who uses her room for studying and school projects, and who honestly doesn't have anywhere else in the house those things could be safely done between siblings and pets, I think it's something that requires consideration that a parent having to deal with "not enough rooms! How do I sort this out?!" might overlook. Especially if the 14 yr old is currently an 8th grader and has had a relatively easy homework load up until now.

If there is a basement or some other option to create another room, I'd ask the 14 yr old her preference. She can share with the 6 yr old and the space can be made into a study for when she needs quiet, or she can use it as her room.

The 10 yr old will always be able to use his room to study if he needs to, or to get away. And the 6 yr old will have a single room by the time she's 10-11, since her older sibling will be off to college. I think it's reasonable to consider options depending on the needs of the 14 yr old in question. If they're coming from each having their own room, I am not optimistic that the 14 yr old will be enthused about sharing a room with a 6 yr old.

I'd be tempted to go against the grain and let the 14 yr old have her own room with the understanding that as soon as she left for college it was going to one of her other siblings. The younger two share, and get their own rooms when the 10 yr old is 14 and the 6 yr old is 10. At that point the youngest girl gets a bunk in her room that the oldest girl crashes on when she comes home to visit. That seems to spread the pain fairly equitably. It means every kid gets a single during their high school years, the oldest kid still has a place to stay when she comes home, and the youngest doesn't make out with a single when she's 10 just because she's the youngest.
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2018 22:34     Subject: three kids two rooms both genders what do you do?
If you are going to have your kids share a room,find the biggest room besides the master.That might be a game room.
Up until our DS moved out,Both some had to share,but both guest rooms were small,and I was not giving up my master.Luckily,we actually had a gameroom with two separate hallway entrances,and 2 separate closets.The room was 10x30 with two windows also.We just put tall bookshelves that fit surprisingly well so neither could even see the other side of the room.They both ended up with a slightly bigger space than their sister.If your wondering,they didn't share until then and they had a 6 year diffrence.