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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Oh, so only people in marriages can be high libido. That sounds like a bored bedroom. Mmm, ok.

What I mean is that most women are high libido when single. I wanted it all the time and could never go without it (like you did). After 8 years of marriage and 2 young kids, my desire for sex with my husband decreased significantly. For the first 2 years we would have sex several times a day. I was by far the woman with the highest sex drive he had ever met. OP’s situation is similar to mine and not to yours. You might be high libido (I doubt it since you could go 10 years without it), but things change once you are married with kids.

You are just tired of your husband.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Oh, so only people in marriages can be high libido. That sounds like a bored bedroom. Mmm, ok.

What I mean is that most women are high libido when single. I wanted it all the time and could never go without it (like you did). After 8 years of marriage and 2 young kids, my desire for sex with my husband decreased significantly. For the first 2 years we would have sex several times a day. I was by far the woman with the highest sex drive he had ever met. OP’s situation is similar to mine and not to yours. You might be high libido (I doubt it since you could go 10 years without it), but things change once you are married with kids.

OP here. What we have switched to is morning sex in recent years. Trying to muster left over energy at night just didn't get it done enough and I found work days wasted as I sat at my office desk horny distracted with thoughts of my wife, but then came home to a wife that was exhausted from taking care of our little boys. I am self-employed and that gives me flexibility too, so sometimes I can come home mid-day. DW is a SAHM, and that helps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Oh, so only people in marriages can be high libido. That sounds like a bored bedroom. Mmm, ok.

What I mean is that most women are high libido when single. I wanted it all the time and could never go without it (like you did). After 8 years of marriage and 2 young kids, my desire for sex with my husband decreased significantly. For the first 2 years we would have sex several times a day. I was by far the woman with the highest sex drive he had ever met. OP’s situation is similar to mine and not to yours. You might be high libido (I doubt it since you could go 10 years without it), but things change once you are married with kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Oh, so only people in marriages can be high libido. That sounds like a bored bedroom. Mmm, ok.

What I mean is that most women are high libido when single. I wanted it all the time and could never go without it (like you did). After 8 years of marriage and 2 young kids, my desire for sex with my husband decreased significantly. For the first 2 years we would have sex several times a day. I was by far the woman with the highest sex drive he had ever met. OP’s situation is similar to mine and not to yours. You might be high libido (I doubt it since you could go 10 years without it), but things change once you are married with kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Oh, so only people in marriages can be high libido. That sounds like a bored bedroom. Mmm, ok.

Anonymous wrote:I'm 48, and it's true, but it's only because kids are older, I cut way back on work, so I'm not as tired anymore, which all leads to an increase libido. DH is 50+, and I haven't noticed his libido going down much.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Marry a man, have kids with him, if after 10 years you still want to have sex everyday than yes, you are high libido. Being single and liking sex is NOT the same thing.

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone remember the thread by some 60-something lady who was going on about how her DH was having an affair but she refused to have sex with him because of menopause? So is this high-libido spike in the 40s supposed to be plummeting as women get into our 50s? Seems like men constantly crave sex while women stop in mid-life. Sad!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Mmm, ok.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For the folks that are saying that it doesn't increase, or if it does increase it's for someone else...is it just because the husbands don't take care of themselves? Or they don't take care of their marriage? What are the varying factors?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the single high-libido older women. The one constant thread that I have heard from similar friends, is that they do not compromise on the quality of sex in a relationship. It's a deal breaker. We know this is important in our relationships AND DO NOT BEGRUDGE OTHERS WHO DO NOT VALUE IT. We are all fit, attractive, and very successful too, so we have no problem attracting men.

Honestly, many men aren't that good in bed, especially over the long haul, so there is a constant one-sided push to keep things interesting. I often get stereotyped too, for being interested in and knowledgeable about sex. Men think that since you are "good" you must have many miles on you and this is the furthest thing from the truth. I was celibate for at least 10 years, so most married women will have more "miles" of their particular model than me. I am also very particular about my partners, so most won't make the "cut." I know I know that if I get into a relationship with someone who doesn't value sex, that I will not be happy.

Because our society has such negative connotations of women and sex, think slut shaming, it is actually very difficult to be a high-libido woman in America.

How can you be high drive and not have sex for 10 years? I don’t consider myself high drive anymore (mid thirties), but I could never go 1 month without sex

It was a combined 10 years and there was a pregnancy in the mix. There was a lot of self-control and meditation during those years too

Combined or not you are not high drive...

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For the folks that are saying that it doesn't increase, or if it does increase it's for someone else...is it just because the husbands don't take care of themselves? Or they don't take care of their marriage? What are the varying factors?