Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who come only on Christmas and Easter are more likely to be turned off by the crowds and the “extra.” Come see us in Mass on other weeks when we’re in the pews in our regular clothes, kids in sports uniforms, just being ourselves. I think that would be more appealing - worshiping with ordinary people living similar busy lives yet making time for their faith.

Odd that attending services on the Church'es most significant observances would be perceived as a turn off, while other days would not be perceived that way.

I agree with the PP. We go weekly and have friends who join us on Christmas and Easter for the pomp and circumstance and tradition. The wife is a lapsed church-goer while her husband is a dubious non-Christian. I never want to push church on them, but wish I could encourage them to try church on a normal Sunday since I think it's a far better reflection of the church's vibe than its two busiest and most ceremonial days of the year.

Yes -- sure, the other 50 Sundays are going to offer a more typical "day in the life of" perspective, but, do you really think these people are interested in being part of a church? You describe them as "a lapsed church-goer . . . and a dubious non-Christian." I mean, I'm a bona fide church lady -- we go every Sunday, I teach Sunday School, etc. -- and I can't imagine why folks like this would be likely to change their ways absent some major life transition.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who come only on Christmas and Easter are more likely to be turned off by the crowds and the “extra.” Come see us in Mass on other weeks when we’re in the pews in our regular clothes, kids in sports uniforms, just being ourselves. I think that would be more appealing - worshiping with ordinary people living similar busy lives yet making time for their faith.

Odd that attending services on the Church'es most significant observances would be perceived as a turn off, while other days would not be perceived that way.

I agree with the PP. We go weekly and have friends who join us on Christmas and Easter for the pomp and circumstance and tradition. The wife is a lapsed church-goer while her husband is a dubious non-Christian. I never want to push church on them, but wish I could encourage them to try church on a normal Sunday since I think it's a far better reflection of the church's vibe than its two busiest and most ceremonial days of the year.

The people you describe probably are not interested in "trying" church and are only there because it's a special event with pomp and circumstance.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who come only on Christmas and Easter are more likely to be turned off by the crowds and the “extra.” Come see us in Mass on other weeks when we’re in the pews in our regular clothes, kids in sports uniforms, just being ourselves. I think that would be more appealing - worshiping with ordinary people living similar busy lives yet making time for their faith.

Odd that attending services on the Church'es most significant observances would be perceived as a turn off, while other days would not be perceived that way.

Probably because with so many extra people, many of whom are unfamiliar with the service or worse yet- not happy to be there to begin with (I’ve been reading all the “We only go because relatives make us” posts) it often lacks the warmth of regular services. I know at Christmas I couldn’t even listen to the readings for all the people talking around me and the year before we were squished so tight in the pew that it was horribly uncomfortable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who come only on Christmas and Easter are more likely to be turned off by the crowds and the “extra.” Come see us in Mass on other weeks when we’re in the pews in our regular clothes, kids in sports uniforms, just being ourselves. I think that would be more appealing - worshiping with ordinary people living similar busy lives yet making time for their faith.

Odd that attending services on the Church'es most significant observances would be perceived as a turn off, while other days would not be perceived that way.

I agree with the PP. We go weekly and have friends who join us on Christmas and Easter for the pomp and circumstance and tradition. The wife is a lapsed church-goer while her husband is a dubious non-Christian. I never want to push church on them, but wish I could encourage them to try church on a normal Sunday since I think it's a far better reflection of the church's vibe than its two busiest and most ceremonial days of the year.

Anonymous wrote:

I would go more often if I could attend in a way that allows me to hang back and get a feel for the faith and practice again at my own speed and on my own time.

I do not go because I get aggressively greeted when I go -- if it's a place I've been before or if it is a new place. There seem to be people assigned (or self-assigned) to "make people feel welcomed." I don't. I feel pushed.

And when I read replies like some of the ones above, I am reminded all over again why I chose not to keep spending time with people like that in an organized way anymore, in the first place.

So I do the good work that I can within the life that I have, and I am the best person I can figure out how to be. And I am perfectly delighted that there are people who find support in those places I do not, and I wish you the very best with it.

Thank you for this. I am part of the membership group at my church, and I think we push the whole "greeter's ministry" too hard. I keep saying that some people are introverts, some are unsure of themselves or how long they want to keep coming, etc. and that our overly welcoming style is hard on certain people. Not everyone wants to meet and be "connected" with other church members immediately. I am going to bring your words to our next meeting. And I hope you find a church home, if that's what you seek.

New poster -- here are two more to take to your meeting. I once went to a church that announced there would be a greeters table at a certain location after the service. When I went there, there was no table. When I asked several people where the table was, no one knew and none of them took the time to say hello or help me find the table, they were busy chatting with their friends. One person said the announcement was probably a mistake. I figured this was a church that didn't want new members and so I didn't go back. I've since met people who attend that church and they are happy with it. I'm not a fan of an aggressive approach either. It may be hard to find a middle ground.

At another church, I signed the visitor's book I didn't hear from them, but when I checked my name on the internet for something unrelated, I found that they were praying for me! I called and asked to have my name taken off that list. Maybe I signed the wrong list, but it seems like a step too far to publish people you're praying for on the internet.

Both were Episcopal churches.

Anonymous wrote:I went for the first time in a long time

Was it inappropriate for me to take communion?

I didn't even know the words to say

Also, who were the people that witnessed Jesus after the resurrection? In the sermon today just one woman was mentioned

In the Episcopal church everyone is welcome at the communion table. If you want to, you can respond to the person offering bread and wine by saying "Amen," but you can also nod or smile. What really matters is that you're joining in one body of Christ and of love.

The women who went to the tomb and saw that it was empty were Mary, the mother of Jesus, Mary Magdalene and another Mary, who is identified differently in different gospels.

Anonymous wrote:I think people who come only on Christmas and Easter are more likely to be turned off by the crowds and the “extra.” Come see us in Mass on other weeks when we’re in the pews in our regular clothes, kids in sports uniforms, just being ourselves. I think that would be more appealing - worshiping with ordinary people living similar busy lives yet making time for their faith.

I get that.