Anonymous
03/18/2018 11:07
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would stay married to someone who spent like that because it shows a lack of self control and respect for your spouse. It is insane the amount of cc debt you have. And you will never make enough money to outearn the spending. Never.
Would not stay married.
Get your spouse on the same page. Pay off the smallest debt first.
Don't fall for the okey-doke, PP. In order, OP's comments on the debt have been:
1. Please try not to judge the spending. It's not all me or junk.
2. FU!
3. Something vague about external forces not in his control.
4. My wife has too many shoes.
If you think this guy's actual problem -- $20k in CC debt and a maxed-out line of credit, and already thinking about replacing his Volvo with his new "windfall" money from paying off this car note -- is a spendy wife and a long-suffering, frugal husband, I have a bridge to sell you.
+100
This thread is eye opening and I’m the spender and high earner in my family.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 18:26
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would stay married to someone who spent like that because it shows a lack of self control and respect for your spouse. It is insane the amount of cc debt you have. And you will never make enough money to outearn the spending. Never.
Would not stay married.
Get your spouse on the same page. Pay off the smallest debt first.
Don't fall for the okey-doke, PP. In order, OP's comments on the debt have been:
1. Please try not to judge the spending. It's not all me or junk.
2. FU!
3. Something vague about external forces not in his control.
4. My wife has too many shoes.
If you think this guy's actual problem -- $20k in CC debt and a maxed-out line of credit, and already thinking about replacing his Volvo with his new "windfall" money from paying off this car note -- is a spendy wife and a long-suffering, frugal husband, I have a bridge to sell you.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 18:20
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:I would stay married to someone who spent like that because it shows a lack of self control and respect for your spouse. It is insane the amount of cc debt you have. And you will never make enough money to outearn the spending. Never.
Would not stay married.
Get your spouse on the same page. Pay off the smallest debt first.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 18:20
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
I would stay married to someone who spent like that because it shows a lack of self control and respect for your spouse. It is insane the amount of cc debt you have. And you will never make enough money to outearn the spending. Never.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 16:06
Subject: Re:Help me spend my car payment!
With HHI of 200K, more than 3 times median HHI in the US, 24K in unsecured debt should be paid off in less than a year, unless it's something TRULY out of your hands like expensive life-saving medication that insurance won't cover.
The spender, regardless of gender, needs to go cash only and on an allowance. I understand that emotions get in the way of things, and some folks have different attitudes about money, but there's literally no other way to pay off debt other than spending less than you earn and applying the difference. It's kindergarten level math. At pretty much any level of income above 6 figs, you can afford anything, you just can't afford everything, and you're no exception.
The spender, regardless of gender, needs to go cash only and on an allowance. I understand that emotions get in the way of things, and some folks have different attitudes about money, but there's literally no other way to pay off debt other than spending less than you earn and applying the difference. It's kindergarten level math. At pretty much any level of income above 6 figs, you can afford anything, you just can't afford everything, and you're no exception.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 15:52
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
FINAL point of clarification....the spender in this family wears a bra, make-up and many, many, many pairs of shoes.....
Come on, you think I'm some dumbass guy that pisses my hard-earned money away on golf clubs and expensive bottles of scotch???
Come on, you think I'm some dumbass guy that pisses my hard-earned money away on golf clubs and expensive bottles of scotch???
Anonymous
03/15/2018 14:50
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
OP if you are a saver you will feel so much better psychologically once you start attacking the credit card debt.
Really go on a bare bones budget and throw all your extra money into paying them down.
Your DH needs to be on a spending budget. X dollars a week.
Really go on a bare bones budget and throw all your extra money into paying them down.
Your DH needs to be on a spending budget. X dollars a week.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 12:21
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
What are the “external forces” out Of your control that you have that no one else does? You are not in a special situation.
With that amount of debt and those interest rates, there needs to be a serious change in habits. I would have a sit down with DH and tell him you do not want to live this way forever.
You need an emergency fund, and to pay down debt. You need to both make a plan to get there.
Only you know how to live in a tighter budget, but it is certainly doable on 200k hhi.
With that amount of debt and those interest rates, there needs to be a serious change in habits. I would have a sit down with DH and tell him you do not want to live this way forever.
You need an emergency fund, and to pay down debt. You need to both make a plan to get there.
Only you know how to live in a tighter budget, but it is certainly doable on 200k hhi.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 11:19
Subject: Re:Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Thanks all for the advice. To clarify, I am not saving for college. Our HHI is roughly 200K. But moving upwards shortly, fingers crossed.
Is my spouse onboard with budgeting? Let me put it this way, I'm the saver in the family friends, married to the spender.
It's an uphill battle for sure when there are external forces often not entirely in one's control.
You need to put your spouse on a monthly budget. No credit cards. He gets $X cash each month to do with as he wants. He can save it for the following month or spend it. When it's gone, it's gone and he has to wait until next month for extra spending money. If he buys lunch and he doesn't have money for tomorrow's lunch, he can brown bag it. You also need to budget how much to spend on food and assorted expenses per month. With your income, that can be a little more generous than beans and rice for every meal, but don't go overboard. Eating out gets budgeted with groceries for the monthly food budget.
You need to map out how much you are paying down and get a schedule for when the CC debt will be gone. At $200K HHI, that's ridiculous to have that amount of debt unless you had an emergency like a health emergency or home disaster not covered by insurance.
At $200K, you should be taking home about $11K per month. Budgeting about $5K for mortgage, insurance, utilities, you have a fairly big amount to work with. Even with the $2400 that you currently budget for daycare and diapers, that leaves you with $3K+. $1500 should be easily feasible unless you have some other major expense that you haven't mentioned. At $1500, you should be able to pay off the debt in around 2 years. If you want to be more aggressive, you can budget $2K per month and be done in closer to 18 months. And this is only an estimate, but you need to be much more serious about getting that debt off your shoulders. You don't even realize how much money you are bleeding away in interest on those high-interest debts. You are paying about $3300 a year in interest fees, so close to $300 in interest a month. Your car loan was costing you much less than this in interest. That extra $300-400 applied to these loans could have save you several hundred dollars a year compounded.
And in case you are thinking it is hard, when our twins were born, we ended up having to pay about $13K of the close to $140K worth of NICU and medical expenses. I worked out a payment plan with the hospital and doctor's office and had it paid off in about 6 months with only slight changes to our regular daily routine. We cut out luxury expenses and kept our food budget about the same. In fact, our monthly budget went up significantly because we had to add the cost of daycare, diapers, formula, etc and I still was able to pay it off in 6 months. And we made less than you do, about $180K at the time. It's all about budgeting and knowing how to make the numbers work in your favor, not in the bank's favor.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 11:16
Subject: Re:Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Thanks all for the advice. To clarify, I am not saving for college. Our HHI is roughly 200K. But moving upwards shortly, fingers crossed.
Is my spouse onboard with budgeting? Let me put it this way, I'm the saver in the family friends, married to the spender.
It's an uphill battle for sure when there are external forces often not entirely in one's control.
You need to put your spouse on a monthly budget. No credit cards. He gets $X cash each month to do with as he wants. He can save it for the following month or spend it. When it's gone, it's gone and he has to wait until next month for extra spending money. If he buys lunch and he doesn't have money for tomorrow's lunch, he can brown bag it. You also need to budget how much to spend on food and assorted expenses per month. With your income, that can be a little more generous than beans and rice for every meal, but don't go overboard. Eating out gets budgeted with groceries for the monthly food budget.
You need to map out how much you are paying down and get a schedule for when the CC debt will be gone. At $200K HHI, that's ridiculous to have that amount of debt unless you had an emergency like a health emergency or home disaster not covered by insurance.
At $200K, you should be taking home about $11K per month. Budgeting about $5K for mortgage, insurance, utilities, you have a fairly big amount to work with. Even with the $2400 that you currently budget for daycare and diapers, that leaves you with $3K+. $1500 should be easily feasible unless you have some other major expense that you haven't mentioned. At $1500, you should be able to pay off the debt in around 2 years. If you want to be more aggressive, you can budget $2K per month and be done in closer to 18 months. And this is only an estimate, but you need to be much more serious about getting that debt off your shoulders. You don't even realize how much money you are bleeding away in interest on those high-interest debts. You are paying about $3300 a year in interest fees, so close to $300 in interest a month. Your car loan was costing you much less than this in interest. That extra $300-400 applied to these loans could have save you several hundred dollars a year compounded.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 10:25
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
Thanks all for the advice. To clarify, I am not saving for college. Our HHI is roughly 200K. But moving upwards shortly, fingers crossed.
Is my spouse onboard with budgeting? Let me put it this way, I'm the saver in the family friends, married to the spender.
It's an uphill battle for sure when there are external forces often not entirely in one's control.
Is my spouse onboard with budgeting? Let me put it this way, I'm the saver in the family friends, married to the spender.
It's an uphill battle for sure when there are external forces often not entirely in one's control.
Anonymous
03/15/2018 09:19
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
It is not just your daycare costs they are getting you to credit card debt that high. Don’t fool yourself.
I would stop saving for college until all that is paid off. I would also slash every possible thing and eat beans and rice rice and beans, to quote Dave Ramsey, until it is paid off.
You haven’t mentioned your HHI or whether your spouse is on board or your total budget, but with the info I have, you are overspending. Period.
Also, cut up all but one of the credit cards and pay in cash for everything you can. It hurts more when you pay that way.
You may have to live in an austere way for 1-2 years to pay off debt like that, but if you and your spouse really want to eliminate it you can do it.
I would stop saving for college until all that is paid off. I would also slash every possible thing and eat beans and rice rice and beans, to quote Dave Ramsey, until it is paid off.
You haven’t mentioned your HHI or whether your spouse is on board or your total budget, but with the info I have, you are overspending. Period.
Also, cut up all but one of the credit cards and pay in cash for everything you can. It hurts more when you pay that way.
You may have to live in an austere way for 1-2 years to pay off debt like that, but if you and your spouse really want to eliminate it you can do it.
Anonymous
03/14/2018 21:38
Subject: Re:Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, in the future don't buy a car with a $350/mo payment when you are $25k in the hole.
It's not. It was $240, but when I got an additional $100 with the tax cut, I plowed that into my car payment. In fact, the original payment was just $235, but I've ratcheted it up a tad.
There's no way the car payment had equivalent interest rates to the credit cards. If that's how you think, I agree with everyone recommending snowballing.
As for college, put your oxygen mask on first, then get to the kids.
I'm not, you're fixating on something that's really not relevant. The question at hand is how you would you spend an additional $700/month.
It is relevant in that it demonstrates your mindset and lack of financial knowledge. You got a $100 extra per month and wanted to put it towards debt (which is good) but plowed it towards what I am confident is you lowest cost debt (which is . . . not).
NP. I agree - the entire post demonstrates lack of financial knowledge. Just the title itself, "spending your car payment" demonstrates this. As opposed to saying "help me pay off my high-interest credit cards", "help me budget", you're still in the "spend, spend, spend" mindset.
FU. Don't lecture me about things as useless as word usage. I came here seeking feedback on how to best use a soon-to-be monthly windfall, for lack of better word, and to those that provided it, it's been a benefit and I thank them for it.
Would a person lacking so-called financial knowledge be thinking 2-3 steps ahead in situations such as these?
You have no clue about my spending habits and are woefully wrong to presume I have a spend, spend, spend mindset. I'd love to show you the holes in my pants and shirts to prove it.
If you have nothing to show for your money, the fact that you have such high interest rate means that you don't know much about finances. Even if it was a sudden debt, you did not consolidate or negotiate. People are giving you solid advice. Attitude is very important in battling debt. It's looking like you don't care about debt at all. Thank you for keeping credit card companies afloat.
Anonymous
03/14/2018 17:59
Subject: Help me spend my car payment!
People that are not good with money and have debts are often thinking several steps ahead because they have to. You have 24K in unsecured debt. We don’t know if that is due to medical bills, or having multiple kids in daycare and having trouble paying bills or eating it two nights a week because you are exhausted. We don’t know if you HHI is 80K or 300k. Your story sounds like you are juggled by debt to tread water but you don’t want to hear that maybe you have made some decisions others would question. If you don’t change your habits the chance of you getting out of constant debt is very low unless you have very high earning potential.
Anonymous
03/14/2018 16:50
Subject: Re:Help me spend my car payment!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, in the future don't buy a car with a $350/mo payment when you are $25k in the hole.
It's not. It was $240, but when I got an additional $100 with the tax cut, I plowed that into my car payment. In fact, the original payment was just $235, but I've ratcheted it up a tad.
There's no way the car payment had equivalent interest rates to the credit cards. If that's how you think, I agree with everyone recommending snowballing.
As for college, put your oxygen mask on first, then get to the kids.
I'm not, you're fixating on something that's really not relevant. The question at hand is how you would you spend an additional $700/month.
It is relevant in that it demonstrates your mindset and lack of financial knowledge. You got a $100 extra per month and wanted to put it towards debt (which is good) but plowed it towards what I am confident is you lowest cost debt (which is . . . not).
NP. I agree - the entire post demonstrates lack of financial knowledge. Just the title itself, "spending your car payment" demonstrates this. As opposed to saying "help me pay off my high-interest credit cards", "help me budget", you're still in the "spend, spend, spend" mindset.
FU. Don't lecture me about things as useless as word usage. I came here seeking feedback on how to best use a soon-to-be monthly windfall, for lack of better word, and to those that provided it, it's been a benefit and I thank them for it.
Would a person lacking so-called financial knowledge be thinking 2-3 steps ahead in situations such as these?
You have no clue about my spending habits and are woefully wrong to presume I have a spend, spend, spend mindset. I'd love to show you the holes in my pants and shirts to prove it.
The fact that you consider not having a car payment a windfall is another example.