Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m in HR and I’ve received this complaint before, actually, and while I agree it’s not a word to be used in the office, I’ve not worked in an office where using it was against any rule like using the n-word is. If someone uses that, there’s sensitivity training to be done. Oddly, the word retarded is not considered insensitive or racist.

I’ve also never heard of “spirit animal” being racist either. That’s a new one to me.

What I always did when I got this complaint was just talk to the person about work appropriate language. Most admitted that they use it so regularly that they don’t think about it or realize they said it at work.

Sometimes inappropriate things slip out. I just had to have a talk with someone whose coworker was offended she said “well f*ck me gently!” when her computer froze and she lost part of a project she hadn’t saved. She didn’t even realize she said it because she said that’s what she says at home when something goes wrong.

If that's true, then your office's anti-discrimination policies are really deficient. Discrimination on the basis of disability is unlawful under the Americans with Disabilities Act, and most state laws (including the DC Human Rights Act). Harassment based on disability is accordingly unlawful where it is severe or pervasive or otherwise creates an intimidating or hostile work environment. Most good policies will encourage employees to report issues before they become severe and pervasive, so as to allow the employer to fix the problem prior to it becoming actionable. Your employer's policy really should cover the use of epithets that make fun of someone on the basis of a disability, just as the policy covers the use of epithets that make fun of someone due to their race.
I agree that this is likely not a terminable offense, in and of itself. The proper result is probably counseling for the employee involved. (However, in this case, with a new manager who is using the word in front of clients, I wouldn't be surprised if the upper management just decided that they had made a bad decision hiring someone who is generally clueless about social norms .... not what you want in management.)

Anonymous wrote:I’m in HR and I’ve received this complaint before, actually, and while I agree it’s not a word to be used in the office, I’ve not worked in an office where using it was against any rule like using the n-word is. If someone uses that, there’s sensitivity training to be done. Oddly, the word retarded is not considered insensitive or racist.

I’ve also never heard of “spirit animal” being racist either. That’s a new one to me.

What I always did when I got this complaint was just talk to the person about work appropriate language. Most admitted that they use it so regularly that they don’t think about it or realize they said it at work.

Sometimes inappropriate things slip out. I just had to have a talk with someone whose coworker was offended she said “well f*ck me gently!” when her computer froze and she lost part of a project she hadn’t saved. She didn’t even realize she said it because she said that’s what she says at home when something goes wrong.

Anonymous wrote:I’m in HR and I’ve received this complaint before, actually, and while I agree it’s not a word to be used in the office, I’ve not worked in an office where using it was against any rule like using the n-word is. If someone uses that, there’s sensitivity training to be done. Oddly, the word retarded is not considered insensitive or racist.

I’ve also never heard of “spirit animal” being racist either. That’s a new one to me.

What I always did when I got this complaint was just talk to the person about work appropriate language. Most admitted that they use it so regularly that they don’t think about it or realize they said it at work.

Sometimes inappropriate things slip out. I just had to have a talk with someone whose coworker was offended she said “well f*ck me gently!” when her computer froze and she lost part of a project she hadn’t saved. She didn’t even realize she said it because she said that’s what she says at home when something goes wrong.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. This is a depressing thread. This is really not debatable at this point—it’s not an acceptable term to use.
The people that are being defensives about it need to learn to adjust. My grandmother had to adjust from calling people “colored” to referring to someone as “black”. Guess what? She somehow managed to do this.
I can accept that someone may not have evil intent in their heart when they used this term, and can accept that some people have been living under a rock and somehow missed the news that for many years now, it’s been recognized this is not appropriate.
HR does need to be informed. They can speak with this person. Since multiple people were at the meeting, anyone could have reported it. The HR person does not need to be punative, but they do need to let the employee know that this language is not appropriate.
If the person doesn’t use the word again—no problem, everyone moves on.
If she does (and by the way, if any of you defensive posters continue to use the word as well) then you their should be consequences.

On the other shoe, my mom cannot seem to deal with the concept that Oriental is offensive. She is otherwise liberal on social mores but I cannot convey that Oriental is a rug and Asian is a person because the former is Euro-centric.

Anonymous wrote:It's surprising to me that she would say this. I love using the word retarded to describe extra stupid things, and even I know to not say it "in mixed company."

Anonymous wrote:What company? I want to know what company has lazy workers that have time on their hands to bother with nonsense and are so easily offended and distracted .

Anonymous wrote:Just remember that HR works for top management. If management asks who tipped them off, they will not hesitate to say so.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. This is a depressing thread. This is really not debatable at this point—it’s not an acceptable term to use.
The people that are being defensives about it need to learn to adjust. My grandmother had to adjust from calling people “colored” to referring to someone as “black”. Guess what? She somehow managed to do this.
I can accept that someone may not have evil intent in their heart when they used this term, and can accept that some people have been living under a rock and somehow missed the news that for many years now, it’s been recognized this is not appropriate.
HR does need to be informed. They can speak with this person. Since multiple people were at the meeting, anyone could have reported it. The HR person does not need to be punative, but they do need to let the employee know that this language is not appropriate.
If the person doesn’t use the word again—no problem, everyone moves on.
If she does (and by the way, if any of you defensive posters continue to use the word as well) then you their should be consequences.