OP, I think you really need to listen to your intuition. If something like this is bothering you to the point of tears and posting on DCUM, take a closer look at this relationship. For some reason he doesn’t make you feel safe.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might have gone to hunt bobcats.

ha ha. Didn’t they end up getting married???

Everyone on DCUM is so supportive of bobcat girl and her relationship, but her now DH isn’t a good guy. She was crazy to go back to him. It seemed to be a toxic relationship. The thread was great, but not the relationship.

Wait, so are they officially married? Was there a follow up post-marriage? I haven’t been on dcum in at least 6 months.

HA- bobcat girl here-
Yes, we did get married. Today is actually our 3 month wedding anniversary. We are both very happy, moved back to RI and are in the process of buying our first home.

Oh and to a PP, no there weren't camo dresses LOL. We had a small 35 guest wedding by the ocean in RI and it was perfect.

I’m the PP who was concerned about the health of your relationship. Have all of those issues he had resolved?

Yes, they have. We worked on a lot of stuff before even getting engaged. Now 3 months into our marriage, we are very happy and healthy.

I’m glad to hear that. Congrats on your marriage.

Anonymous wrote:Well? Did he show? Waiting on pins and needles...

You're 3 days too late. Go back to page 3 and read her response at 11/17 13:43.

Well? Did he show? Waiting on pins and needles...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might have gone to hunt bobcats.

ha ha. Didn’t they end up getting married???

Everyone on DCUM is so supportive of bobcat girl and her relationship, but her now DH isn’t a good guy. She was crazy to go back to him. It seemed to be a toxic relationship. The thread was great, but not the relationship.

Wait, so are they officially married? Was there a follow up post-marriage? I haven’t been on dcum in at least 6 months.

HA- bobcat girl here-
Yes, we did get married. Today is actually our 3 month wedding anniversary. We are both very happy, moved back to RI and are in the process of buying our first home.

Oh and to a PP, no there weren't camo dresses LOL. We had a small 35 guest wedding by the ocean in RI and it was perfect.

I’m the PP who was concerned about the health of your relationship. Have all of those issues he had resolved?

Yes, they have. We worked on a lot of stuff before even getting engaged. Now 3 months into our marriage, we are very happy and healthy.

Text him that another guy is asking to hang out with you. That’ll get his attention (I guess).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might have gone to hunt bobcats.

ha ha. Didn’t they end up getting married???

Everyone on DCUM is so supportive of bobcat girl and her relationship, but her now DH isn’t a good guy. She was crazy to go back to him. It seemed to be a toxic relationship. The thread was great, but not the relationship.

Wait, so are they officially married? Was there a follow up post-marriage? I haven’t been on dcum in at least 6 months.

HA- bobcat girl here-
Yes, we did get married. Today is actually our 3 month wedding anniversary. We are both very happy, moved back to RI and are in the process of buying our first home.

Oh and to a PP, no there weren't camo dresses LOL. We had a small 35 guest wedding by the ocean in RI and it was perfect.

I’m the PP who was concerned about the health of your relationship. Have all of those issues he had resolved?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might have gone to hunt bobcats.

ha ha. Didn’t they end up getting married???

Everyone on DCUM is so supportive of bobcat girl and her relationship, but her now DH isn’t a good guy. She was crazy to go back to him. It seemed to be a toxic relationship. The thread was great, but not the relationship.

Wait, so are they officially married? Was there a follow up post-marriage? I haven’t been on dcum in at least 6 months.

HA- bobcat girl here-
Yes, we did get married. Today is actually our 3 month wedding anniversary. We are both very happy, moved back to RI and are in the process of buying our first home.

Oh and to a PP, no there weren't camo dresses LOL. We had a small 35 guest wedding by the ocean in RI and it was perfect.

Obviously OP wasn't clear enough that she's DTF right now, or he'd have been over in a flash.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am crazy ? thanks y'all, love you so much DCUM

I think what people were trying to tell you is that you shouldn't be afraid to express your needs, and you need to learn to not take things to personally if you have any chance of a being in a relationship. The reason he's not rushing over is not that he doesn't want to be with you. It is that he is tired, hungry and trying to take care of his own needs. If that doesn't work for you, just tell him next time, "Hey I'd love to see you tonight, but I'm really tired and I want to go to bed by 10. Can you be here by 8:30? If not, let's hang out tomorrow." Women often anticipate other people's needs, but most men just aren't that way. They need to be told what your needs are in a straightforward way.

Be very careful going this route when you're dating! Keep this up and he'll start looking twice at the cute girl with the nice smile that doesn't have as many "needs" and who he doesn't know spends her nights crying. Dating is about keeping up appearances- sorry but true. Be cool next time!

Disagree that OP has to hide her needs so she won’t be kicked to the curb. At some level, you have to be compatible. If her BF likes to make plans last minute and roll in when he gets there, there is no point in her pretending she is cool with it if she really isn’t. By being up front he can make the decision that he needs more time at home that evening and now doesn’t feel this pressure to fit in all these things, he can move some things around to get there by 8:30, or he realizes that he needs someone that is fine with last minute. But it his choice and he goes in knowing the deal and OP gets what she needs whatever his choice is - either he is there to spend time with her, she gets to relax and not on the lookout for him, or she ends up available to find someone that is a better match.

Give him 20 minutes...if no show, plan on going on on your own. If nothing else, run errands. Do not pick up his call. When he asks where you were say sweetly that he had mentioned x time. He was a no show so you used the time appropriately. Smile while you say this.

True, he may have fallen asleep but really, your time is valuable too.

He likely fell asleep.

I wouldn’t contact him again until morning.

I can't stop laughing at the mental image of OP dancing alone maniacally in her apartment, crying and watching the clock, only to shape up when the boyfriend gets there as promised and she has to pretend she's happy to watch Twin Peaks

Anonymous wrote:You sound very high maintenance at best.

+1

Jesus, I bet you're a handful, OP.

Anonymous wrote:He might have gone to hunt bobcats.

My immediate thought.