Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Email back and say, thanks for the invitation. I'd like to do a party at Pump it up for Larla's school and other friends since this sounds like a party mainly for your and girlfriend's families. What day is most convent for you or would you prefer I hold it on my own for her friends? Your girlfriend is welcome to come.

OP here--they went ahead and sent invites to my kid's friends already. So while I am going to have another party, some of the people are going to be caught in this mess and get invited twice.

That's really crappy. I'd go to two parities knowing the situation, especially if you told me what he did. Honestly, I'd rather take my kid to Pump it Up and he'd rather go there than to someone's house, especially when its colder out. Your idea is much better. He should not have done that.

My kids friends have already called to express confusion and weirdness about the fact the invite was to HER house. It's really mean and cruel--especially since I was trying to work it out amicably by having it on neutral grounds. I am just crushed for my kid who already told me "We have an invitation for you. Can you come?" I didn't know what to say.

When you called to ask him to make plans, did you already know that he sent out invites? I think you did...

Anonymous wrote:Don't focus on the GF. This was your STB exes' choice and you need to focus on your legal case for protecting your child's interests. Focusing on the GF does not help you at all. It makes you look jealous and not the mature one who is the only one who can cooperative promote the child's interests, which include a respectful relationship with the father. OK?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Email back and say, thanks for the invitation. I'd like to do a party at Pump it up for Larla's school and other friends since this sounds like a party mainly for your and girlfriend's families. What day is most convent for you or would you prefer I hold it on my own for her friends? Your girlfriend is welcome to come.

OP here--they went ahead and sent invites to my kid's friends already. So while I am going to have another party, some of the people are going to be caught in this mess and get invited twice.

That's really crappy. I'd go to two parities knowing the situation, especially if you told me what he did. Honestly, I'd rather take my kid to Pump it Up and he'd rather go there than to someone's house, especially when its colder out. Your idea is much better. He should not have done that.

My kids friends have already called to express confusion and weirdness about the fact the invite was to HER house. It's really mean and cruel--especially since I was trying to work it out amicably by having it on neutral grounds. I am just crushed for my kid who already told me "We have an invitation for you. Can you come?" I didn't know what to say.

Anonymous wrote:This is one of those times that you just have to think to yourself "My love for my child is greater than my hatred (contempt, disappointment, etc.) of my ex."

Your child would like you to go to the party. Go. And like a pp mentioned earlier in the thread, look your best and SMILE big.

They both sound like crappy people and probably deserve each other. I'm sorry, OP.

Anonymous wrote:I'm the lawyer responding above about your custody case. I would not engage in a battle involving your child's friends/families by holding a second party this year. You attend, support your child, and, yes, this is an element in your case if you are seeking to show his incapacity to co-parent effectively and respectfully. Again, it is not itself abusive behavior, but if there is a pattern of this, collect your evidence. Ignore the GF. Your behavior will be under a microscope. Everything must be done to promote your child's interests, not your feelings or wish for revenge or such.

Anonymous wrote:OP here--is this something that can be used in our custody battle? I just dont understand how someone with a history of girlfriends (and bad decisions) is so comfortably doing this while going through a very contentious custody battle? Doesn't it reflect terribly?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son gets 2 birthday parties this year. That's the only solution. Invite your family and DSs friends to a party at your house.

Don't go to your Exs girlfriend's house. WTF?!!

How old is your kid?

I would send an invite soon.

My kid is turning 7.

That is REALLY crappy.

Send out invites.

To one or two moms you know, apologize for the double invite and let them know (discretely, lol) that you had this party planned but your husband and his new girlfriend went behind your back and planned this party at the girlfriend's house with her extended family. Let them know when you touched base with your husband to finalize the plans (since you usually are the one to plan the parties and your husband never has had a role in it and just shows up) he told you about this one. Tell them you understand if they cannot make it to the originally planned party.

I guarantee that they will get the word out and her real bday party will be well attended by her friends.

I wpuld not attend the girlfriend's party under these circumstances an probably most of her ftiends woukd not either. Sisters before bitches.

Anonymous wrote:OP here--is this something that can be used in our custody battle? I just dont understand how someone with a history of girlfriends (and bad decisions) is so comfortably doing this while going through a very contentious custody battle? Doesn't it reflect terribly?

OP It's a sign of lack of willingness to respectfully co-parent and consider the best interests of the child. So, not on it's own is it abusive, but if you are taking of all this to trial and have more proof of uncooperative behavior an disregard of child's best interests you might succeed in arguing for final decisionmaking authority for major decisions. Unfortunately, birthday parties are not that, and if he chooses to hold a party during his parenting time, your kids friends and their families will continue to be caught up in his drama. Take a shower, put on your lipstick, hug your child, and rise above. Hugs to you. (I'm in the same boat.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Email back and say, thanks for the invitation. I'd like to do a party at Pump it up for Larla's school and other friends since this sounds like a party mainly for your and girlfriend's families. What day is most convent for you or would you prefer I hold it on my own for her friends? Your girlfriend is welcome to come.

OP here--they went ahead and sent invites to my kid's friends already. So while I am going to have another party, some of the people are going to be caught in this mess and get invited twice.