Anonymous wrote:If his initials are AH, then he's not just dating you . . . .

Eva Braun has joined the thread.....

If his initials are AH, then he's not just dating you . . . .

I might, in the hopes that we would get serious and I would eventually meet the kids and get to spend weekends with him, his kids and mine.

It would be hard finding time to date only during the week, though - I'm super busy during the week and don't always feel like going out when I have to be at 5:00 the next morning.

It would definitely depend on a lot of factors that you can't glean from one DCUM post. I would not rule it out. I think it says a lot about a guy who is a good, reliable dad and loves his kids, not trying to get out of his time with them. If we liked each other enough I would understand that it would take some time but eventually I might be part of their lives. I can appreciate a guy who is up front and doesn't want to introduce every woman he dates to the kids. There are so many different things that could influence how this goes, it's impossible to say one way or the other.

Same experience as what you describe, PP. And it works especially well when he is the Fun Dad who loves to hang out with the kids and do fun things, but doesn't do well with discipline, organization, and the business of getting them through the school week.

To date him, you have to enjoy being around the kids and doing family activities. It's not a good set up if you just want to go out to do adult activities with only him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew of a situation like this. Turns out, the guy was going on dates on the off weekend. He told my friend he had the kids every weekend, but it was every other weekend.

This.
Seriously, who only has custody on every.single.weekend? But not during the week? I can't imagine anyone signing off on that. Every other weekend? Absolutely. But not every single weekend.

I did. Ex insisted only she could properly manage the children during the school week. So the judge said--okay, Mr. Ex. gets them every weekend and for 6 weeks in the summer. By the time holidays and spring break were factored in, I had the kids 52 percent of the time. Weekends are more work but more fun and I get to spend the whole day with the children instead of just an hour in the morning and a few hours in the evening.

I know of several people with this arrangement and they love it.

Dad loves having 2 full days with the kids to do whatever & the mom loves having every weekend to herself.

No. Btdt.

We were both always too tired during the week for dates. He could never be my plus 1 to weddings, company parties, etc. I was always the 3rd or 5th wheel when out with friends because he couldn't go.

His divorce had a rule that we had to be dating 1 yr before I could meet the kids. One yr is a long time to invest in a relationship before you even meet the kid who may end up hating you or being a little jerk.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew of a situation like this. Turns out, the guy was going on dates on the off weekend. He told my friend he had the kids every weekend, but it was every other weekend.

This.
Seriously, who only has custody on every.single.weekend? But not during the week? I can't imagine anyone signing off on that. Every other weekend? Absolutely. But not every single weekend.

Sadly, many "fun" dads have custody on the wknd. The moms know the Dad is irresponsible so they trade custody for the week and make sure kids get to school, activities, do homework are prepared for tests, etc. Dad gets the weekends without any responsibility.

No homework or activities on weekends in your country? Do you live in Mexico?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew of a situation like this. Turns out, the guy was going on dates on the off weekend. He told my friend he had the kids every weekend, but it was every other weekend.

This.
Seriously, who only has custody on every.single.weekend? But not during the week? I can't imagine anyone signing off on that. Every other weekend? Absolutely. But not every single weekend.

Sadly, many "fun" dads have custody on the wknd. The moms know the Dad is irresponsible so they trade custody for the week and make sure kids get to school, activities, do homework are prepared for tests, etc. Dad gets the weekends without any responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would love it! So fun for our kids to do outings together!

Wow, what a wildly optimistic comment.

Well- it's actually how I met my husband of 25 years (before our separation recently).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. He's married. Don't be foolish.

+1

"Custody issues." LOL

Not married, they jointly announced it on FB. I've seen his divorce papers.

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. He's married. Don't be foolish.

+1

"Custody issues." LOL

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's not married, he just has his kids every weekend.

Are you certain of that? People lie all the time. Did you meet online?

I know both of them from the time that they were married. They are definitely divorced.

Well then yeah, I'd be fine with it - if I felt a good connection and wanted a relationship with him, and things were otherwise good.
But only date him seriously if you support the fact that his kids will come first, and be a priority for him.

Anonymous wrote:Would love it! So fun for our kids to do outings together!

Wow, what a wildly optimistic comment.