Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:26     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.


Completely depends on the field.


For the vast majority of fields this applies.


+1

Haven't there been a ton of studies that have shown this?
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:22     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.


Completely depends on the field.


For the vast majority of fields this applies.


It depends on what you define. If the person is sociable, good with small talk, but does not go out much, no impact.

And, outside of sales type fields, I think competence is more important.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:21     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
If this is important to you, you need to leave.

DH is an extrovert with 100+ friends and lives in the same town he grew up in. I'm from Canada, don't know anyone here and have maybe 2-3 friends. DH knows I'm an introvert. It's fine. We enjoy that the other has different social needs. It doesn't have to be the death of your relationship.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:20     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.


Completely depends on the field.


EQ is not the same as friends. EQ is more about being friendly. Not going out drinking or what ever. Maybe if you are a car salesman....
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:13     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.


Completely depends on the field.


For the vast majority of fields this applies.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 12:08     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.


Completely depends on the field.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 11:44     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:I am a guy, 53. I am very selective about friends: I have three close friends -- been close with them since the 80's when I was in grad school. They do not live around here, so I do not see them very often.

I have a ton of acquaintances I am friendly with, but they are not *friends*. I rarely go out with them. We get along fine, but I do not know them well enough to call them friends. Some are through work, some are people I have gotten to know around town. I go out maybe once a month.

From what I can tell, I am fairly typical unless the guy goes to bars to drink or plays sports.


You are me. Except I now live in an area where everybody is from here so there are more friends because people never leave.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 11:35     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Keep in mind someone without the social skills to make friends is probably not going to advance at work very well, where lifelong earnings are almost always based off of EQ.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 11:34     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
***And I ran, I ran so far away....****
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 11:08     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
My husband has almost no friends. We have one good couple friend, but they have very many friends and a busy social life, so we only see them a few times per year. DH doesn't bond easily with new people, and hasn't really made friends with the husbands of my friends. So our social life sucks. Mine's good though.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 09:33     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
It was a red flag in my marriage. XH destroys his girlfriends' and wives' social circles through manipulation. And everyone at work hates him. He gets transfered around a lot. Always at odds with someone. Someone always trying to destroy his career.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 09:29     Subject: Re:He pretty much has no friends
I'm an introvert and I see my few friends maybe 2-3 times per year. I work in a tiring job (teaching) and the last thing I want to do is go out after work. I tend to see my friends in the summer once or twice and maybe once during the school year. If you have a problem with this, it isn't going to change. That is who he is. Move on.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 08:59     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
There's nothing wrong with being an introvert. Might not be a good fit for you but doesn't mean he's weird. Break it off so he can be happy with another introvert.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 08:49     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
Anonymous wrote:Fiancé and I have been together for 2.5 years now. Since I've known him, he's pretty much had no friends besides two guys that he sees maybe every 3-5 months. He works 60 hours a week and come the weekend, doesn't want to do anything. I on the other hand, love to go grab dinner and drinks with some of my friends and their boyfriends or husbands. When we go out, he has a good time and is friendly with my best friends husband but not to the level of hanging out by themselves. He honesty doesn't care that he doesn't really have any friends but this bothers me. He thinks it's not a big deal but for some reason it just really bothers me. We spend a lot of weekends just going out together and running errands and grabbing dinner. Probably 1-2 weekends a month we go out with one of my couple friends. Would this bother anyone else? I want him to have his own set of friends that I can get to know and we can go out with or just friends he can go have guy time with. Is this a red flag or do some guys just truly not care about having close friends?


I want everyone 2 see this. The fiance does have friends.

OP, is upset because he's not going out drinking with his buddies every weeken like her ex used to do. I'm not mking up the part about the ex she mentions him in her posts at 22:18 and 22:24

It's OP with the issues and she's projecting them onto her fiance.
Anonymous
Post 07/02/2017 08:46     Subject: He pretty much has no friends
OP, if you marry this guy, you will end up miserable, divorced, or both. This clearly bothers you, and she little things before marriage become the big things after marriage. Your failed marriage will be among the 50%+ that fail for reasons that were known before marriage but were minimized, ignored, or thought to be things that would change.