Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow DD14 to take uber in a variety of circumstances, including sometimes to/from evening events such as concerts. Our reason was, basically, "why not"? DD is on our family uber account, so I get texts when she requests and completes a ride, see the driver's name and license, and can track her trip. It seems safe enough to us that we're willing to allow it because it's convenient and gives her what we consider a desirable amount of increased independence if she's not constrained by my schedule and ability to drive her places.

None of what you listed will prevent her from getting rped or molested. Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Did you know that the vast majority of rapes/molestations to teenage girls are committed by people they know? Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Sorry to be blunt, but do you know that sex trafficking rings have shopping lists of clients preferences and have teams of guys driving, scouting out for and fulfilling said shopping lists. Do you know that as smart as your kid is it will not do them any good during the first couple weeks in captivity in a dog cage. Once they broken they will be moved across the country. Then they will be sold on average 25 times a day.

And it only takes about 10 second to take them.

Wow, you sound crazy.

Not crazy at all it happens more than people know/want to know.

Give one example of this happening. Provide city, date, link, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow DD14 to take uber in a variety of circumstances, including sometimes to/from evening events such as concerts. Our reason was, basically, "why not"? DD is on our family uber account, so I get texts when she requests and completes a ride, see the driver's name and license, and can track her trip. It seems safe enough to us that we're willing to allow it because it's convenient and gives her what we consider a desirable amount of increased independence if she's not constrained by my schedule and ability to drive her places.

None of what you listed will prevent her from getting rped or molested. Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Did you know that the vast majority of rapes/molestations to teenage girls are committed by people they know? Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Sorry to be blunt, but do you know that sex trafficking rings have shopping lists of clients preferences and have teams of guys driving, scouting out for and fulfilling said shopping lists. Do you know that as smart as your kid is it will not do them any good during the first couple weeks in captivity in a dog cage. Once they broken they will be moved across the country. Then they will be sold on average 25 times a day.

And it only takes about 10 second to take them.

Where did you come up with this garbage? The National Enquirer?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow DD14 to take uber in a variety of circumstances, including sometimes to/from evening events such as concerts. Our reason was, basically, "why not"? DD is on our family uber account, so I get texts when she requests and completes a ride, see the driver's name and license, and can track her trip. It seems safe enough to us that we're willing to allow it because it's convenient and gives her what we consider a desirable amount of increased independence if she's not constrained by my schedule and ability to drive her places.

None of what you listed will prevent her from getting rped or molested. Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Did you know that the vast majority of rapes/molestations to teenage girls are committed by people they know? Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Sorry to be blunt, but do you know that sex trafficking rings have shopping lists of clients preferences and have teams of guys driving, scouting out for and fulfilling said shopping lists. Do you know that as smart as your kid is it will not do them any good during the first couple weeks in captivity in a dog cage. Once they broken they will be moved across the country. Then they will be sold on average 25 times a day.

And it only takes about 10 second to take them.

Wow, you sound crazy.

Not crazy at all it happens more than people know/want to know.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I feel like I can't be there for every single thing my children do. I want them to be independent and have their own experiences. I can't do background checks on every adult they interact with. I do my best to set them up for success, talk about safety, give them the tools they need to excel.

But everything is dangerous. One of the most dangerous things we do is drive or be passengers in cars. Yet no one bats an eye at that because it's so common.

Sometimes the choice isn't pick my kids up myself or let them uber home. Sometimes the choice is let them uber home or don't let them go at all. Sometimes the experience is worth the (tiny) risk.

I wonder how many of the posters criticizing allowing teens to use uber are parents whose children aren't teenagers yet, considering this is on GP instead of the teen board. I know when my dd was 3, I couldn't imagine letting her ride with a stranger or use public transportation alone. But she grew, and we're growing. And now she's 14, a rising sophomore, and in 3 short years she'll be moving away to college. All I can do is hope I've taught her how to manage safely on her own. For me, part of that is realizing that if I daddy get her to adulthood in a bubble and never let her take any calculated risks, I haven't taught her how to live in the real world.

This is the most sane post here yet.

For those arguing that they want to shield their child from a "crime of opportunity," I'm sorry, but the only way to do that is to never let them leave your sight, ever. Which is obviously completely ridiculous. Since the dawn of time, assaults and sex crimes have been committed on women and children by: family members, strangers, teachers, service workers, clergy, coaches, friends, siblings and families of friends, neighbors, their own friends, and I'm sure here are many more classes of people I could name. So by your logic, to prevent them from falling victim to any crime of opportunity they must never be alone with any of the above named individuals.

Yeah. I too want my underage daughter to have the experience of being hit on by leacherous men, so she can know what the real world is like and then we can go to Starbucks for a latte and havea hear to heart.

You don't get it. It's going to happen no matter how much you want to shelter her. The right thing to do is to teach her how to handle the situation and how to react.

I'm not the quoted PP but the response I bolded here is just naïve, to be blunt. "The right thing to do" is to ensure you never put your own child into a situation that is potentially stupidly dangerous just so you can prove to the world you're Not A Helicopter Parent.

You can teach all the self-defense and "reactions" you want, but if a stranger has your kid already in a vehicle, how does the kid "react" once the doors are locked by the driver and the driver is speeding away with your kid? Try to grab the driver by the throat from the back seat? Try to get over the seat and take the wheel somehow? And crash in the attempt? No amount of self-defense classes or role-playing with mom or dad is going to prepare her for that situation.

As for having the phone in your hand to call 911 just in case -- assuming the driver hasn't already threatened the kid and made her or him hand over the phone -- it's already too late.

Yeah, do teach tweens and teens serious self-defense for life in general. I believe in that. But there is nothing wrong, and everything right, with teaching a kid to make smart choices and that includes the choice not to get into a car with a stranger. We tell our younger kids never, ever get in a car with a stranger, then tell tweens and teens it's fine because, hey, everyone uses Uber. They check their drivers out, right? I looked up their so-called background checks. It's a joke--Google it. And no, I wouldn't let my kid take a taxi alone either at this age.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow DD14 to take uber in a variety of circumstances, including sometimes to/from evening events such as concerts. Our reason was, basically, "why not"? DD is on our family uber account, so I get texts when she requests and completes a ride, see the driver's name and license, and can track her trip. It seems safe enough to us that we're willing to allow it because it's convenient and gives her what we consider a desirable amount of increased independence if she's not constrained by my schedule and ability to drive her places.

None of what you listed will prevent her from getting rped or molested. Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Did you know that the vast majority of rapes/molestations to teenage girls are committed by people they know? Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Sorry to be blunt, but do you know that sex trafficking rings have shopping lists of clients preferences and have teams of guys driving, scouting out for and fulfilling said shopping lists. Do you know that as smart as your kid is it will not do them any good during the first couple weeks in captivity in a dog cage. Once they broken they will be moved across the country. Then they will be sold on average 25 times a day.

And it only takes about 10 second to take them.

Wow, you sound crazy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow DD14 to take uber in a variety of circumstances, including sometimes to/from evening events such as concerts. Our reason was, basically, "why not"? DD is on our family uber account, so I get texts when she requests and completes a ride, see the driver's name and license, and can track her trip. It seems safe enough to us that we're willing to allow it because it's convenient and gives her what we consider a desirable amount of increased independence if she's not constrained by my schedule and ability to drive her places.

None of what you listed will prevent her from getting rped or molested. Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Did you know that the vast majority of rapes/molestations to teenage girls are committed by people they know? Sorry to be harsh and graphic, but you ound clueless.

Sorry to be blunt, but do you know that sex trafficking rings have shopping lists of clients preferences and have teams of guys driving, scouting out for and fulfilling said shopping lists. Do you know that as smart as your kid is it will not do them any good during the first couple weeks in captivity in a dog cage. Once they broken they will be moved across the country. Then they will be sold on average 25 times a day.

And it only takes about 10 second to take them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unlikely your 14-year old will engage in non-consensual sex with the Uber driver. It's more likely she'll bang some dude at the concert for beer or weed.

This. It's more important to have a parent at the concert to chaperone than even on the drive home. As I know from experience when I was 15.

No it's more important to teach them how to stay safe at a concert and respect their bodies and make good decisions ... otherwise you don't prevent her from banging a guy for beer you just prevent her from banging a guy for beer at that 1 specific concert.

If you need to hawk over your kids at a concert she is probably banging the neighbor down the street.

Anonymous wrote:It's unlikely your 14-year old will engage in non-consensual sex with the Uber driver. It's more likely she'll bang some dude at the concert for beer or weed.

This. It's more important to have a parent at the concert to chaperone than even on the drive home. As I know from experience when I was 15.

My 15 year old son got an Uber account when he started high school. He's at TJ and we live a 1/2 an hour away, or more, during rush hour, and we don't work near the school. It's for emergency use only, but I don't want him to have something unplanned come up, have to stay after school, miss the bus, have school let out early for some reason, have an emergency and be unable to do the pickup myself, have a carpool fall through or whatever else, and have him end up stranded. Of course, he would use it in the afternoon or early evening. And he does not use it for rides home from after school sports when there is no busing, or for rides to and from social events, despite the hassle of driving him across the county and setting up carpools.

Also, DS is six feet tall, and looks like he could be 17 or 18. I don't love it, but it's better than having no backup plan. Fortunately, in the year he has had the account, he has never had to use it. None of his TJ friends use Uber regularly, despite the TJ transportation hassles. I don't think his base school friends even have accounts.

DD is 13 and very petite. There is no way she would get an Uber account in MS. Once she starts HS, she will probably need to get an account if she is at TJ, for the same reasons as her brother. But it would make me very, very uncomfortable, and I would move heaven and Earth not to have her use it, or make her brother drop what he was doing and ride with her if possible. If she goes to her base school, I see no need for an Uber account at all-- at least for her first couple of years. After that, it probably will depend on if she has a car. I know it's sexist, but a petite teen girl taking Uber alone makes me much more nervous than a large teen boy.

Then again, neither of my kids would be going to concerts alone at 14. DS has started going to Wolftrap, Kennedy Center type events with a group of friends. But a parent of a group member always goes with them and sits separately. DD either goes with a friend and her parents, or 2-3 parents decide to take the girls.

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. Alone in a car with a stranger late at night.

I wouldn't even put a young teen in one during the day.

+1

Like another op just posted--there have been numerous sexual assaults in uber.

You would put your child in a CAR alone with a stranger??

You people have zero common sense.

We are careful with our 20-something babysitter just going a few miles at night. My husband goes out, checks the driver--tells her to text when she gets home, etc.

I am 47 and I don't run/jog alone at night either or on wooded paths alone. My father taught me well. I was at the ER G-town when a victim was brought in who had been assaulted on wooded trail at 4pm on a Sunday. Pulled off the path. It was tragic.

NP here. Just want to say, predators go where the prey is, and especially where the prey is unprotected by another. This goes for lions looking at calves at the watering hole, and for human predators.

So by way of analogy, the lion does not choose just any calf. She chooses the lamb that is the easy mark, maybe away from its mother or mother and calf are a little away from the herd.

Likewise, human predators find jobs where they will have access to prey, in particular, unrestricted or unmonitored access (e.g. teacher/coach/priest/camp counselor) They are not hanging out in the wilderness, they are in the watering holes of schools or the mall. (Unless the wilderness is the unmonitored bike trail where prey jogs along alone.)

And yes, kids are more likely to be abused by someone they know, but hello, it's because someone they know is more likely to be given unrestricted, unmonitored access to the kid.

I mean people, just think about it. Yes, everything can be construed as a danger to our kids, but some set-ups are more dangerous than others. Unmonitored access is the problematic set-up.

Here in LA there have been girls/young women raped by Uber drivers and it has been underreported. Two LAPD officers told some parents/kids this in a drug awareness program a few months ago. There is a story about one of them in the local news now.

I don't let my 14 y.o. DD uber, mostly because our lives are not set up so she has to uber places. But if she were to uber, it would not be alone. A gaggle of girls is safer than one alone.

Anonymous wrote:No reason to say YES to concerts for young teens. Not without a parents. Unfortunately parents are too lazy to go.

OMG... You kids take you to concerts, how bizarre.

Parents are too drunk

Anonymous wrote:You have to be 18 to use Uber, right? Anyway a 16 yr old daughter of a friend was propositioned by an Uber driver. And when she told her parents and they complained, their account was dropped.


Parents today are even less involved in their kids lives than ever before. We are the laziest generation of parents ever.

THIS. There is no way in hell I'm letting my under-18 y.o. kids use Uber.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I feel like I can't be there for every single thing my children do. I want them to be independent and have their own experiences. I can't do background checks on every adult they interact with. I do my best to set them up for success, talk about safety, give them the tools they need to excel.

But everything is dangerous. One of the most dangerous things we do is drive or be passengers in cars. Yet no one bats an eye at that because it's so common.

Sometimes the choice isn't pick my kids up myself or let them uber home. Sometimes the choice is let them uber home or don't let them go at all. Sometimes the experience is worth the (tiny) risk.

I wonder how many of the posters criticizing allowing teens to use uber are parents whose children aren't teenagers yet, considering this is on GP instead of the teen board. I know when my dd was 3, I couldn't imagine letting her ride with a stranger or use public transportation alone. But she grew, and we're growing. And now she's 14, a rising sophomore, and in 3 short years she'll be moving away to college. All I can do is hope I've taught her how to manage safely on her own. For me, part of that is realizing that if I daddy get her to adulthood in a bubble and never let her take any calculated risks, I haven't taught her how to live in the real world.

This is the most sane post here yet.

For those arguing that they want to shield their child from a "crime of opportunity," I'm sorry, but the only way to do that is to never let them leave your sight, ever. Which is obviously completely ridiculous. Since the dawn of time, assaults and sex crimes have been committed on women and children by: family members, strangers, teachers, service workers, clergy, coaches, friends, siblings and families of friends, neighbors, their own friends, and I'm sure here are many more classes of people I could name. So by your logic, to prevent them from falling victim to any crime of opportunity they must never be alone with any of the above named individuals.

Yeah. I too want my underage daughter to have the experience of being hit on by leacherous men, so she can know what the real world is like and then we can go to Starbucks for a latte and havea hear to heart.

You don't get it. It's going to happen no matter how much you want to shelter her. The right thing to do is to teach her how to handle the situation and how to react.