So then don't do it. It's not that hard to figure out, is it?

We stopped doing huge party's. The last one we did we had a food drive with it, which was great. We asked people to bring food instead of gifts, because our kiddos already had all the toys they needed. It was a nice party, but way too big and I forgot to pray before we ate. That upset me a lot because I felt personally we had lost the entire point of celebrating their birthdays. We wanted to make it about being thankful to God for each of them and celebrating how precious they are and how God created them so uniquely. The party was so crazy and loud and one kiddo got hurt. Another kiddo was sick and we ended up having to tell everyone after in case their kiddo got sick. I had a bad feeling in my stomach that we were just missing the point! From this point on we have each child chose one friend and a place they want to go. We try to celebrate and thank God for them and make sure we acknowledged how grateful we are. This has been so much better.. and less expensive, more special and way less chaotic. I hope that helps! God bless you!
Mary

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have the party at home, invite fewer kids, make the theme low-tech, make the cake yourself and serve pizza. I used to do venue parties but I liked this year's low-key movie party.

This is exactly what we did for my 10 yr old, and it was super cheap and so much fun. Old school home bday party with a Nerf theme, with homemade cupcakes that my son helped make. Brought back the memories! Afterwards, we took all the boys to a bounce house with an arcade. My son said it was the best bday party ever.

You had a party at home and then took them all to a bounce house? Doesn't that mean that you pay a lot AND you need to clean up the house after a bunch of boys have ripped through it?

We have summer birthday parties at our pool, comes to less than $150 including the pool passes, the cake (which I make) and the balloons and party favors.

For my other child, who is a winter birthday, we spend the same by renting a local community house in a park for about $50.

You don't need to spend $700 at a bouncy palace.

for DD's 9th birthday, she wants to take 3 friends (total of 4 children) to get their nails done, go out for dinner, and have a sleep over. We're done with birthday parties at the Bouncy places, Little Gym etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In the "olden day" we had 10 kids or less at home for 2 hours with cake. The end.

I was born in '76 and had exactly ONE birthday party at home - my second birthday. Every other one was at a place, there were at least 20 kids (I had a lot of friend-groups), and they were 2.5 hours.

I was born in 78 in an umc suburb (not DC) and there was always one or two kids in my class every year who did a whole-class rented venue party. I specifically remember the other parents talking about how they threw those parties to compensate for other things. Like, Tara's dad was under indictment for stealing serious money from the childrens hospital, and laura's family looked like they had money but turns out it was all a facade. In fact, my mom has become friends with laura's mom in retirement and it turns out they have zero money, had to sell the $2m home, and her mom now works minimum wage to pay the bills.

I kid you not. The ONLY kids throwing expensive parties in the 80s were people who felt they had to prove something. Given the old negative reputation, i'm not sure how these whole-class monster parties became the norm.

Oh, that's an exaggeration. I was born in 1972 and grew up in solidly middle class neighborhoods in small crappy cities. I distinctly remember some designation parties--roller rink, ice skating, and even a Chuck E. Cheese party in about 1982 or 1983. None of these parents had anything to prove. Agree that the majority of parties were at people's homes but it wasn't weird to have a low key party out of house. I think back then they basically just charged her admission the the roller rink, though--they didn't have all these bells and whistles and two teenagers paid to keep the kids in line.

+ 1. I recall going to McDonald's birthdays, Chuck E Cheese birthdays, and skating parties in the early 80s. One friend's mom schlepped a bunch of us to a matinee for a birthday party. I don't recall there being anything majorly wrong with those families.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS turned 7 and every year I say the same thing, these parties are so expensive by the time I rent the party/play space, get pizza, cake and snacks! but it's fun for our son and we celebrate his baby sister birthday at the same party. Does anyone else feel like this? I am not hurting for money but geez, now I know why my parents never had friend parties and just had family celebrate at the house growing up! Good thing this is a once a year event!

Sounds like your parents were level headed and refused to be followers and braggers.

Translation: This responder is passively aggressively calling you a follower and a braggart.

+1. Especially the passive aggressive part.

Anonymous wrote:There are cheaper venues -the nature center, the rec center, playground pavillion, etc.

We've always done a home party though. We rented a moonbounce (although we have since purchased our own since it was cheaper that way), have a few simple games (pinata, pin the tail on the donkey), pizza, and cake.

Drop offs - so no extra parents to feed. No goody bag (pinata candy is enough).
DOllar Tree for the paper ware and balloons and decor.

Done and done.

Whenever I say it's a drop off party, parents won't let their kids come. It's annoying.

I love the bounce house, gymnastics, soccer, trampoline parties!! They're so easy.

We never invite the whole class though, after preschool. We only started at age 4 and then did them until about age 9. Then it's over!

And honestly, we did one at the house but it wasn't a ton cheaper. After that we just did ones at kid friendly places. Parents love it! Kids love it! And it's easy for me.

I hate doing the party thing but my kid is really into it. What I hate more is having strangers in my house. Tried to cut costs one year by doing the community pool party and it poured. Party got moved to my house. Never again. Venues with low minimums work better for us. I can usually get it under $500 including cake and then there's not a lot of work for me. I'm already stretched to my limit.

Had it home. Made the cupcakes, baked frozen pizzas, made hot dogs, had chips and Caprisuns. The kids played with my kids toys and in the yard. Easiest bday ever. Cleanup involved rolling up the plastic tablecloth and chucking everything in the garbage can.

I got tired of trying to have my kids' birthday parties at home and having weather interfere (snow in April, I kid you not, or just major rain or super freak cold in July), so for a few years I started having them at my church fellowship hall. I discovered members of my church got free use of the fellowship hall and kitchen, you just had to reserve it. I could use all the tables and chairs I wanted. I had to throw trash away but didn't need to vacuum. It is huge too, you can actually fit an inflatable in there the ceiling is so high. It was awesome. I've had a band, a character, an inflatable, and some science guy in there. Never worry about the weather. Just provide some food, and done. Never cost more than $300 (most of which was for the entertainment). I only do my parties for 90 minutes.

Now I do most at home. I decided to invest in an inflatable that uses water for my kids to keep at home to use all summer (and hopefully next). Our last party a few weeks ago was just kids using the inflatable. I quickly discovered using water balloons involves too much after clean up. But the inflatable, people stayed way over the end time, last one left after 3 hours. I made the cake. I ordered papa johns and used a 50% coupon code so I got it for cheap. Slice up a watermelon. Done.

There are cheaper venues -the nature center, the rec center, playground pavillion, etc.

We've always done a home party though. We rented a moonbounce (although we have since purchased our own since it was cheaper that way), have a few simple games (pinata, pin the tail on the donkey), pizza, and cake.

Drop offs - so no extra parents to feed. No goody bag (pinata candy is enough).
DOllar Tree for the paper ware and balloons and decor.

Done and done.

Anonymous wrote:Have the party at home, invite fewer kids, make the theme low-tech, make the cake yourself and serve pizza. I used to do venue parties but I liked this year's low-key movie party.

This is exactly what we did for my 10 yr old, and it was super cheap and so much fun. Old school home bday party with a Nerf theme, with homemade cupcakes that my son helped make. Brought back the memories! Afterwards, we took all the boys to a bounce house with an arcade. My son said it was the best bday party ever.

1) You don't have to have a big party every year for your children.

2) Do family parties or small outings with a few (three) friends.

My kids have never had a big party, and it hasn't really mattered all that much. Sure they might like one, but not having one doesn't make them pariahs and they enjoy just as much what we do with friends and family.