Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - as others have said, don't focus on him getting his due. Focus on you. I went through this too and someone told me, "the best revenge is to have a good life".

OP here, great advice and I am trying so hard to do this. But, I can't get either one out of my mind. STBX has a gambling problem (currently going to GA) and was severely emotionally abused as a child (thought the love of a good wife could fix that). So he has some serious unresolved issues. His affair partner is superr needy, divorced for about 8 years, not dated since, and has a couple of pretty wild kids. I can't help but think this is a recipe for disaster. I want to move on and live a great life, but a small part of me lives for the day their little utopia crumbles. Thanks for all the great storiies, I appreciate it.

Anonymous wrote:OP - as others have said, don't focus on him getting his due. Focus on you. I went through this too and someone told me, "the best revenge is to have a good life".

Anonymous wrote:I know someone that left his wife and kids for a stripper. Sex and coke plus endless money from his father's pocket kept the fire going. He moved his wife and kids out, moved slutty in. 6 months later during a drugged, drunken fight, pole dancer pulled out a gun and shot herself in the head in front of him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was not physical -- only cyber.

Reconnected electronically with a HS GF; in HS, we went to third base, but no farther.

She was going through an ugly divorce, I was very unhappy in my marriage and life in general. She lived a several hundred miles from me. She did not have the money to travel, and I did not have the excuse to travel.

We sexted intensely. [i] My wife suspected something was up, and hacked into my iPad. She read the conversations.... things got ugly. As this discussion went further, I slowly realized this relationship is not going anywhere. She had become an evangelical Christian since HS whereas I am secular/atheist.

We broke off the conversations texted from 2012 to 2013. It took until 2014 until things settled down at home. I apologized, while making it clear that there was never an in-person relationship. I do not know if she believes me or not.

For how long? Was it a few times or over an extended period of time? Any "love" type messages or just sexual?

My take is that women will take the emotional type messages relaying affection/love/longing much harder than the x-rated stuff.

It went on for about 1 year, but hot and cold. No love type messages, at least not from me.

Anonymous wrote:For every horror story told her there are stories to the contrary. This crowd here is desperate to find anecdotal support for their moral dogma. Realty is different and more convoluted than these simple beliefs. YMMV!

Anonymous wrote:

For every horror story told her there are stories to the contrary. This crowd here is desperate to find anecdotal support for their moral dogma. Realty is different and more convoluted than these simple beliefs. YMMV!

well, the title of the thread was Mid-Life Affairs that Implode. You can start your own "Mid Life Affairs that worked out great" thread!

For every horror story told her there are stories to the contrary. This crowd here is desperate to find anecdotal support for their moral dogma. Realty is different and more convoluted than these simple beliefs. YMMV!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid-life crisis can usually be explained by a relationship that has been going downhill for many years. But why is it so often applied to men than women?

Only men have an irresponsible, juvenile, shameful "midlife crisis". Women have an epiphany where they realize they settled for an unworthy man who they didn't really love, and they leave him in a praiseworthy journey of self-discovery in which they find true love.

An evangelical Christian sexted at a marriage-threatening level?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This was not physical -- only cyber.

Reconnected electronically with a HS GF; in HS, we went to third base, but no farther.

She was going through an ugly divorce, I was very unhappy in my marriage and life in general. She lived a several hundred miles from me. She did not have the money to travel, and I did not have the excuse to travel.

We sexted intensely. [i] My wife suspected something was up, and hacked into my iPad. She read the conversations.... things got ugly. As this discussion went further, I slowly realized this relationship is not going anywhere. She had become an evangelical Christian since HS whereas I am secular/atheist.

We broke off the conversations texted from 2012 to 2013. It took until 2014 until things settled down at home. I apologized, while making it clear that there was never an in-person relationship. I do not know if she believes me or not.

For how long? Was it a few times or over an extended period of time? Any "love" type messages or just sexual?

My take is that women will take the emotional type messages relaying affection/love/longing much harder than the x-rated stuff.

Only men have an irresponsible, juvenile, shameful "midlife crisis". Women have an epiphany where they realize they settled for an unworthy man who they didn't really love, and they leave him in a praiseworthy journey of self-discovery in which they find true love.