Anonymous wrote:The person close to you who is also most likely the answer the phone in an emergency. Your mom? Your FIL? Etc. then Give that person emergency contact info (pediatrician contact # etc.)

This.

So, years ago, we were in a similar situation. We listed grandparents who were well out of town (Orlando) as the emergency contacts. We were at a daycare based at my wife's work, so we asked the closest co-worker to her if they would be a short-term emergency contact to go, pick up the kids and bring them back to the office in an emergency. It was someone who had older kids (high school age) who understood the stress of having no local emergency contacts. She was gracious enough to accept.

We then entered school and immediately took some extra time to spend a little more time at drop-off and pick-up and we made a few friends of kids in our class that the kids socialized with. The daycare also had a yard outside the building and we often let the kids run around in the yard with other kids after pick-up when the facility closed. Usually like 10 minutes for the kids to run around and play together. We had a couple of playdates where we invited the families to our home and we talked with the parents and we figured out a few families that were in similar situations. We asked if we could trade off with them being emergency contacts. The idea was that if one parent was late getting there before the school closed, the other parent(s) could pick up the kids and let the kids play out in the yard until the late parent arrived. In a real emergency, we planned to find someplace close by (like a McDonald's or something) and they could go there to wait for the parent in an emergency. We found 2 other families that were willing to exchange names and we all became emergency pickups for the other 2 kids. It took about 3 months to get this worked out but none of us had emergencies in those few months, and it worked out. I don't think any of us used it that year, but it was nice for all of us to feel like we had a plan if an emergency did happen.

I'm a director at a full day early childhood program. Directed 3 different programs over my 30+ career, teaching before that. I want two different types of people for emergency contacts:

1. someone local who can pick up your child should you not be able to. And someone local who can track you down if need be (your secretary, co-worker, etc). (could be 2 different people) If one parent is traveling and the other gets in a car accident on the way to childcare, who can pick your child up?

2. someone who can make emergency decisions at the hospital should we not be able to reach you and your partner. So that could be grandparents, etc - doesn't need to be local, just needs to give permission to put a cast on the broken arm, etc.

Anonymous wrote:This thread of conversation is missing the point. If she just moved to the area, maybe getting away from a bad situation, she doesn't have friends here yet! She may not have any from the old life she wants (or is even safe) to have contact with. She doesn't yet know her neighbors! I don't know the names of any of my neighbors and I've lived there for 15 years. What if she is looking for a job and needs day care to get a job? Even if she just got a job, you really think a new coworker of a week or two will offer to be an emergency contact? Really? There are people in this world who do not have anyone else in their lives. They are managing life on their own. They are not deadbeats. they pay their bills. They manage to make ends meet. They do not have nor have ever had a "case worker". I have been there. I didn't have any kids but I have been truly on my own. These women just do it all on their own. But your "policy" says, "Tough, come back and apply for a day care opening after you've made some close friends". Really?

You can talk to the daycare. I recently dropped my forms off and just admitted we didn’t have anyone and asked if I should put down my pediatrician’s office. The school office was fine with me leaving it blank and said I could always update it later if I found a neighbor or someone else.

I used a coworker who lived walking distance from daycare, a neighbor with a kid at the same daycare and later my retired neighbor who is almost always home.

This thread of conversation is missing the point. If she just moved to the area, maybe getting away from a bad situation, she doesn't have friends here yet! She may not have any from the old life she wants (or is even safe) to have contact with. She doesn't yet know her neighbors! I don't know the names of any of my neighbors and I've lived there for 15 years. What if she is looking for a job and needs day care to get a job? Even if she just got a job, you really think a new coworker of a week or two will offer to be an emergency contact? Really? There are people in this world who do not have anyone else in their lives. They are managing life on their own. They are not deadbeats. they pay their bills. They manage to make ends meet. They do not have nor have ever had a "case worker". I have been there. I didn't have any kids but I have been truly on my own. These women just do it all on their own. But your "policy" says, "Tough, come back and apply for a day care opening after you've made some close friends". Really?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

And CPS would hand them right back over to my parents (who have the necessary POA's) three hours later when their flight arrived. I doubt that would traumatize them for life.

By the way, this is a problem of YOUR own making, not mine. I've tried for years to make friends, and no one is interested.

Why do you think you have not had success making friends? I don't know anyone who seems incapable of forming any friendships. Hopefully people are interested.

I'm different than anyone else. I don't meant that in a "look how unique" I am way, but in a horrible, awful, isolating, I've tried to change how strange I am way. I've tried, but it just doesn't work, because people (women) aren't open-minded enough to be friends with someone like me.

I feel the same way! Ive started putting myself out there more... mom group, exercise class, just saying "hi" on neighborhood walks... but like you I don't have any friends around here. I often feel like all the other moms are normal and I'm not sure how to change. I have no idea who I would put on a form like that as my parents and DH's are both 6 hours away!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another military family here. I lie on these forms. I have no friends and no local family. We don't know our neighbors. I work from home, so my coworkers aren't local either.
In a real emergency, my parents are 3 hours away by plane and can afford the ticket.

I think these requests are stupid and demoralizing.

I agree. I would have to fight not to fill in these forms as for a long time we had no one. Nobody really looks anyway so I started giving the phone number of a faraway relative.

My oldest will be 18 soon. Can I put the oldest down as the EC for our younger kids?

I am 13 and 14 years older than my youngest 2 siblings, and I was the emergency contact as soon as I hit 18 (this was before everyone had cell phones, but i did have "car phone")

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

And CPS would hand them right back over to my parents (who have the necessary POA's) three hours later when their flight arrived. I doubt that would traumatize them for life.

By the way, this is a problem of YOUR own making, not mine. I've tried for years to make friends, and no one is interested.

Why do you think you have not had success making friends? I don't know anyone who seems incapable of forming any friendships. Hopefully people are interested.

I'm different than anyone else. I don't meant that in a "look how unique" I am way, but in a horrible, awful, isolating, I've tried to change how strange I am way. I've tried, but it just doesn't work, because people (women) aren't open-minded enough to be friends with someone like me.

Awe, don't get down on yourself, you sound like a nice person. Some folks are naturally more adept at meeting new people. It doesn't mean that they form deep, trusting friendships any easier - those take time to develop.

You can have a back up for child pick up in place - they don't have to be your best bud. A sitter, a neighbor, a coworker, someone at the school or church. You already have an emergency contact with your parents. You're doing o.k.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

And CPS would hand them right back over to my parents (who have the necessary POA's) three hours later when their flight arrived. I doubt that would traumatize them for life.

By the way, this is a problem of YOUR own making, not mine. I've tried for years to make friends, and no one is interested.

Why do you think you have not had success making friends? I don't know anyone who seems incapable of forming any friendships. Hopefully people are interested.

I'm different than anyone else. I don't meant that in a "look how unique" I am way, but in a horrible, awful, isolating, I've tried to change how strange I am way. I've tried, but it just doesn't work, because people (women) aren't open-minded enough to be friends with someone like me.

My neighbors old daycare brought the kids to the local police substation when there was a bad storm, and the workers weren't willing to stay any later (I think regular closing was 6pm, and this was after 8pm). They had been in touch with all of the parents, who were also stuck - and also told the kids ahead of time. I think the daycare also made sure they had a neghborhood resources officer (or whatever it's called, not a standard catch the bad guys officer) there - nobody had a problem with it. I heard some parents didn't make it there until close to midnight.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

And CPS would hand them right back over to my parents (who have the necessary POA's) three hours later when their flight arrived. I doubt that would traumatize them for life.

By the way, this is a problem of YOUR own making, not mine. I've tried for years to make friends, and no one is interested.

Why do you think you have not had success making friends? I don't know anyone who seems incapable of forming any friendships. Hopefully people are interested.

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

And CPS would hand them right back over to my parents (who have the necessary POA's) three hours later when their flight arrived. I doubt that would traumatize them for life.

By the way, this is a problem of YOUR own making, not mine. I've tried for years to make friends, and no one is interested.

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.

Which is another reason why you should always list a trusted relative or old family friend on that form.

Just be aware if there was an emergency and both parents could not pick up, and no contact person could get there, most schools are legally required to turn children in this situation over to CPS.