Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, the thing is that we are partners in a bit law firm, and also have a few houses paid in full.
When they graduate they will be even more spoiled than they were before they went to college because they will inherit each a house, and not to mention a job in their parents business. We already charted a path for them, and thats why I posted this. I would have liked them to be more independent and suffer a bit more as me and my spouse have suffered going through college and hs

Um so don't give them the house or the jobs. It's the lab you charted for them but maybe they want their own path (once educated). I hope you didn't tell them they would inherit all this stuff. That's what spoils kids. We make a decent living (much less than you I'm sure) and have a trust set up for our daughter. At no point is she going to be told she's inheriting anything. she will get school and grad school paid for and helped along the way with things if it works out but there is nothing for sure set up that she inherits. Did you not I will the value of a dollar in them during their 18 years of life? Did you do charitable giving and involve them in projects that don't just benefit them? Kids don't randomly learn these things, it has to come from the parents and be part of the "good human citizen" education you give them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They did not ask to be born. We wanted a family and so we had kids. If we could not have afforded basics - and college education is basic - we would not have had them.

College education is not basic. The vast majority of families in this country cannot afford to pay for college outright - that's why people are loaded to their eyeballs in school loan debt. Higher education for the sake of education is, and has always been, a luxury of the rich. For the rest of the population it's a means to employability, and an incredibly expensive investment . You do your kids a disfavor by allowing them to believe college is basic.

NP. It is basic for me. Maybe not you, maybe not the majority of America, but its a basic for me. I only had as many kids as I could afford to put through school.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, the thing is that we are partners in a bit law firm, and also have a few houses paid in full.
When they graduate they will be even more spoiled than they were before they went to college because they will inherit each a house, and not to mention a job in their parents business. We already charted a path for them, and thats why I posted this. I would have liked them to be more independent and suffer a bit more as me and my spouse have suffered going through college and hs

Anonymous wrote:OP here, the thing is that we are partners in a bit law firm, and also have a few houses paid in full.
When they graduate they will be even more spoiled than they were before they went to college because they will inherit each a house, and not to mention a job in their parents business. We already charted a path for them, and thats why I posted this. I would have liked them to be more independent and suffer a bit more as me and my spouse have suffered going through college and hs

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They did not ask to be born. We wanted a family and so we had kids. If we could not have afforded basics - and college education is basic - we would not have had them.

College education is not basic. The vast majority of families in this country cannot afford to pay for college outright - that's why people are loaded to their eyeballs in school loan debt. Higher education for the sake of education is, and has always been, a luxury of the rich. For the rest of the population it's a means to employability, and an incredibly expensive investment . You do your kids a disfavor by allowing them to believe college is basic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They did not ask to be born. We wanted a family and so we had kids. If we could not have afforded basics - and college education is basic - we would not have had them.

College education is not basic. The vast majority of families in this country cannot afford to pay for college outright - that's why people are loaded to their eyeballs in school loan debt. Higher education for the sake of education is, and has always been, a luxury of the rich. For the rest of the population it's a means to employability, and an incredibly expensive investment . You do your kids a disfavor by allowing them to believe college is basic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They did not ask to be born. We wanted a family and so we had kids. If we could not have afforded basics - and college education is basic - we would not have had them.

College education is not basic. The vast majority of families in this country cannot afford to pay for college outright - that's why people are loaded to their eyeballs in school loan debt. Higher education for the sake of education is, and has always been, a luxury of the rich. For the rest of the population it's a means to employability, and an incredibly expensive investment . You do your kids a disfavor by allowing them to believe college is basic.

Anonymous wrote:I would have them take out loans and then if they do well surprise them by paying them off as a graduation present. That way they'll have some skin in the game and actually value their education but not start out in life with unnecessary (you said you can pay for it) student loan debt.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They did not ask to be born. We wanted a family and so we had kids. If we could not have afforded basics - and college education is basic - we would not have had them.