NP:

Take the "you look SO MUCH younger than your age" comments with a grain of salt. No one is going to tell you that you look your age. I wish I had a nickel for every women who says that "everyone tells her she looks ten years younger."

Op, there is a big difference between confidence and being conceited. You've crossed that line. It's good you're fine being alone because being conceited is very off putting and few guys will want to put up with it. See if you can figure out how to do the confidence bit by itself. It's far more attractive and I bet you'll be even happier

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I called him. I don't regret telling him before that I didn't like what he said but I really wish I had done it with more sensitivity. When I called him this time, it was a difficult conversation because he was feeling very hurt. Based on some of his past comments and his reaction to my blunder, I'm beginning to wonder if he's in love with me or at least has real feelings for me. We are in the same social circle and have known each other socially for some time.

I'm sure I'll make other mistakes as I get back into dating but that would be easier with guys I've just met, who don't care. I don't want to hurt someone who possibly feels emotionally connected to me so I should probably end this..but I like him and don't want to.

Stop worrying about tomorrow and deal with today. You like him. He likes you. Pursue it and see where it goes. Deal with the warts when they pop up instead of trying to anticipate them or creating them. Relax. Enjoy.

Thanks for the. When I spoke with a girlfriend about everything she said almost the same thing. She said I'm trying to anticipate what if scenarios to avoid heartbreak but I should instead enjoy the moment, dealing with issues as they arise. This is the first time I've engaged in a sex chat with a guy so early, that's because I like him so much and he know how I feel. I'm going to stop trying to plan for what next scenarios and enjoy this experience, however long it lasts.

I'm not self-absorbed or conceited IRL. My friends say I'm very sweet and considerate to everyone- but there are other traits that annoy them, I'm sure. I'm confident because I've worked very hard since my divorce to build that confidence, with the help of a counselor. There was a time when I felt unattractive, worthless, deeply depressed and had no energy for friendships. I didn't want to get up in the morning, didn't want to speak with anyone new. With a lot of work I started feeling good about myself. I would never want to go back to the me that had zero self-esteem. For many years men rarely approached even though I was younger than I am now and I rarely made new friends. That's because I felt bad about myself and feeling no self-esteem kept people away. Now I get more people approaching me, men and women and I think it's because I'm confident, my energy is positive and that draws people to me. I do enjoy the attention I get from men, because it's an occasuinal reminder to me that I turned myself from a deeply negative place to positive and positive is better.

I don't expect that there's an endless supply of men but thanks to all of the counseling, I love myself and I know that I can be happy and fulfilled with or without a man in my life.

Sorry to be harsh on you, OP - but it sounds like you wanted honest feeeback. It's great you have confidence in yourself, amd there's no reason you shouldn't. But it's all in the delivery, I guess.

What was ops other thread

I had the same reaction as PPs when I read OP's prior thread, as well as this one. She mentions so many times, even when irrelevant, that she gets hit on all the time, she looks younger than her age, total strangers ignore the hot young thing next to her an hit on her, etc. And then after the first blunder, she seemed ready to chalk it up to being rusty at dating but seemed very confident that there could be a revolving door of men in her future, so no biggie. And even in an anonymous forum, she wouldn't state her age.

I wasn't going to say anything because it's a benign thing, to each their own but now with the concern that he's falling in love with her?? OP, you very well may be a beauty, a catch, the whole thing but you also have an overinflated ego and I can't imagine this won't keep biting you in the butt.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I called him. I don't regret telling him before that I didn't like what he said but I really wish I had done it with more sensitivity. When I called him this time, it was a difficult conversation because he was feeling very hurt. Based on some of his past comments and his reaction to my blunder, I'm beginning to wonder if he's in love with me or at least has real feelings for me. We are in the same social circle and have known each other socially for some time.

I'm sure I'll make other mistakes as I get back into dating but that would be easier with guys I've just met, who don't care. I don't want to hurt someone who possibly feels emotionally connected to me so I should probably end this..but I like him and don't want to.

Stop worrying about tomorrow and deal with today. You like him. He likes you. Pursue it and see where it goes. Deal with the warts when they pop up instead of trying to anticipate them or creating them. Relax. Enjoy.

Work on your personality before you worry about dating. No one will want to spend a lot of time with you with your current personality

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord you sound full of yourself. I mean, you sounded a little conceited when you posted twice about your looks and how much men hit on you but now with your "he must be in love with me" comment, you just sound incredibly conceited with no self awareness. Work on that. At your age, looks only go so far with getting you a LTR. If you continue to have the shitty attitude, it's going to be a struggle

At ANY age looks alone will not get you into or through a LTR. When women over 40 get divorced, the immediate response is she must have let herself go and became frumpy. When a woman says she didn't let herself go and thatshe still looks good at an older age and feels good about herself after divorce, she's described as conceited. Interesting.

Except that's not what OP posted. Twice she mentioned that she gets hit on all the.time and that many people tell her she looks younger. Like seriously, many. Men and women and people she knows and strangers. Add that it with the fact that because she hurt his feelings so obviously he's in love with her. Oh and the "we can talk naughty but only on my terms and if you don't do it on my terms (which I haven't even told uou) I will make assumptions about you and shut you down". Oh and don't you dare call it a date, because she's not interested in you like that. But still, take her out. Yeah, OP is a far cry from a catch.

Now if op had simply said "I still look good , I work out, eat healthy, get complimented, hit on, and I feel great" maybe the other stuff could be passed off as nerves miscommunication. Instead, op comes off high maintenance and conceited.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord you sound full of yourself. I mean, you sounded a little conceited when you posted twice about your looks and how much men hit on you but now with your "he must be in love with me" comment, you just sound incredibly conceited with no self awareness. Work on that. At your age, looks only go so far with getting you a LTR. If you continue to have the shitty attitude, it's going to be a struggle

At ANY age looks alone will not get you into or through a LTR. When women over 40 get divorced, the immediate response is she must have let herself go and became frumpy. When a woman says she didn't let herself go and thatshe still looks good at an older age and feels good about herself after divorce, she's described as conceited. Interesting.

Actually, no. Its when you add in everything else OP has posted that she comes off conceited with no self awareness. But good try.

Anonymous wrote:Good lord you sound full of yourself. I mean, you sounded a little conceited when you posted twice about your looks and how much men hit on you but now with your "he must be in love with me" comment, you just sound incredibly conceited with no self awareness. Work on that. At your age, looks only go so far with getting you a LTR. If you continue to have the shitty attitude, it's going to be a struggle

At ANY age looks alone will not get you into or through a LTR. When women over 40 get divorced, the immediate response is she must have let herself go and became frumpy. When a woman says she didn't let herself go and thatshe still looks good at an older age and feels good about herself after divorce, she's described as conceited. Interesting.

Op, you've got a big ego and seem socially inept. Good luck with all that. If you'd like me to provide all the examples I've seen here at how you turn people off, I'd be happy to oblige.

Anonymous wrote:Good lord you sound full of yourself. I mean, you sounded a little conceited when you posted twice about your looks and how much men hit on you but now with your "he must be in love with me" comment, you just sound incredibly conceited with no self awareness. Work on that. At your age, looks only go so far with getting you a LTR. If you continue to have the shitty attitude, it's going to be a struggle

x2. If you shut me down twice in a short period of time after I was the one taking risk, I would have walked, regardless of how hot you are. It's just not worth aggravation.

and BTW, I suspect that I'm close in age to you, as I've been married for over 20 years.

Good lord you sound full of yourself. I mean, you sounded a little conceited when you posted twice about your looks and how much men hit on you but now with your "he must be in love with me" comment, you just sound incredibly conceited with no self awareness. Work on that. At your age, looks only go so far with getting you a LTR. If you continue to have the shitty attitude, it's going to be a struggle

OP here. I called him. I don't regret telling him before that I didn't like what he said but I really wish I had done it with more sensitivity. When I called him this time, it was a difficult conversation because he was feeling very hurt. Based on some of his past comments and his reaction to my blunder, I'm beginning to wonder if he's in love with me or at least has real feelings for me. We are in the same social circle and have known each other socially for some time.

I'm sure I'll make other mistakes as I get back into dating but that would be easier with guys I've just met, who don't care. I don't want to hurt someone who possibly feels emotionally connected to me so I should probably end this..but I like him and don't want to.