I have IBS and can take a long time in the bathroom, too. Never at the same time every day though!

That's why I recommended a doctor's appointment earlier.

^^i meant "dicking around"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can hide access to certain apps and programs so that someone else can't see them if they have your devices. Just FYI. I learned this from a married man.

Always an affair in DCUM land. You people just love to try to make other people feel bad or insecure.

Im not the pp but you and the OP can live in lala land. My AP told me he takes his phone in the BR to email me. His wife is all over his stuff too. He finds a way. So not trying to make her insecure, just trying to open her eyes that he may not just be watching videos... What advice do you have for her?????

I am laughing so hard that you are not at all grossed out or put off by the fact that your married AP emails you while he's pooping. O what romance.

I had this problem with my DH especially after our second child was born. I ended up tearfully confronting him telling him that he either needed to go to the doctor or admit to me that he was just digging around on the Internet because spending 30 minutes at a stretch in the bathroom was just not acceptable especially in the evenings.

DH is normally not a jackass and is in fact very responsible and does all kinds of stuff with the kids so it kind of surprised me that he was pulling this kind of behavior. He did not admit to digging around on the Internet but he said he understood and that things would get better and they did for the most part. I am not above yelling up are you done yet when he's been up there for 10 minutes and it's time to get the kids ready for bed. I think it's just easy for him to get absorbed in reading something, which I understand.

Anonymous wrote:If he takes his phone he's having an affair

Lol. No.

OP, I also have a DH who hides on the bathroom forever. He's usually playing SimCity.

Loser. Counseling for you both.

Interesting how much of the advice involves "having" him do this or that, or doing things for him like scheduling doctor appointments. Doesn't anybody else see this as a problematic dynamic? He is an adult, treat him as one.

Honestly it probably is an affair. There are apps they can use that mask everything so even if you see his phone you won't know. I only found out about that because our iCloud account is linked and there were free texting apps that had been downloaded. Found out on a fluke.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can hide access to certain apps and programs so that someone else can't see them if they have your devices. Just FYI. I learned this from a married man.

Always an affair in DCUM land. You people just love to try to make other people feel bad or insecure.

Im not the pp but you and the OP can live in lala land. My AP told me he takes his phone in the BR to email me. His wife is all over his stuff too. He finds a way. So not trying to make her insecure, just trying to open her eyes that he may not just be watching videos... What advice do you have for her?????

To not listen to you f***ing psychos who paint everything as an affair. Go back to being your skanky self and emailing your boyfriend while he's on the shitter.

OP, he is avoiding his responsibilities.
Whether he's talking to other women, who knows. There's ways to find out.

But, I would print out some information, or talk to a doctor, and present your concerns to him. Because if he's truly in there for 30-40 mins, three times each evening, that's honestly an issue. I take less than a minute to poop. Yes I know everyone is different but some people truly just like to sit there, relaxed, on their phones or reading or whatever, and that's fine! But for him to pretend he 'needs' to do that is either a) a lie or b) a major health concern. So he either cuts the shit and admits he's been avoiding helping, or he goes to the doctor. That's it.

If he admits he's been lying/avoiding, try to discuss with him why. He doesn't have to like the whole bedtime/witching hour phase each evening (not many people do) but it's not fair to you. Tell him that.

Does he change into more relaxed comfortable clothes when he gets home? Does be sit in a car or at a desk most of the day? If so he may need to get better fitting/relaxed clothes for work. I used to do the same thing, with out the phone. I was on the road all the time. And just the position of sitting with belt digging into and pants pushing just below my stomach for hours at time really messed with my stomach. I would come home and put on more relaxed clothes and like clock work my insides would relax to the point where I had to go to bathroom at almost the exact same times every evening.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Probably the only time he gets from bratty kids and a nagging wife...

This! Let him poop in peace.

Perhaps she wants some peace. She should go to the upstairs bathroom for the same amounts of time? Maybe they trade days.

How much Preparation H do you go through????

Omg did someone drop off a bunch of random kids at his house? Who would do such a thing?
Or did he marry a woman who had lots of kids from a prior relationship?
Where did all those kids come from and why is this selfish woman asking him to babysit them? The nerve!

Anonymous wrote:Probably the only time he gets from bratty kids and a nagging wife...

This! Let him poop in peace.