It's tough having teens in your 50s. We take ours on vacation, but it's not easy. They alternate between being fun and being awful. DH and I have not changed a bit, but our children change every few seconds. It's exhausting. I'm looking forward to the post-college years, when other parents tell me their kids all get along and become nice and friendly and appreciative of their parents. You may get lucky and have nice, easy to manage kids, but I don't. Mine have always been strong-willed and difficult, but the teen years are the most difficult. Plus I worry incessantly about them. They think they are mature, but they know nothing....

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure that is what my friend who died of cancer at age 44 thought.

Who are you talking to?

I'm sure that is what my friend who died of cancer at age 44 thought.

I'm 41, my kids are 17 and 15.

I have friends just starting to have kids. That would suck.
We are young and healthy, I'm a few years we can travel WHILE STILL HEALTHY.
No medications or canes needed.
Hopefully we can do this for 20 years or more. Yeah, we are lucky and smart.

Anonymous wrote:For us it was important to have both kids by age 30. We did not want to look like our kids "grandparents" at school events, kids activities, etc. See so much of that now where is is hard to tell if the adult is a parent or a grand parent!. Sorry....IMO always best to have kids early in life, when you have the energy to play with and take care of them and also to ensure that you will be around to see them become independent!

Wow. What a helpful contribution to this thread!

Anonymous wrote:For us it was important to have both kids by age 30. We did not want to look like our kids "grandparents" at school events, kids activities, etc. See so much of that now where is is hard to tell if the adult is a parent or a grand parent!. Sorry....IMO always best to have kids early in life, when you have the energy to play with and take care of them and also to ensure that you will be around to see them become independent!

That's hilarious! We see the same when we go to our kids school events!

For us it was important to have both kids by age 30. We did not want to look like our kids "grandparents" at school events, kids activities, etc. See so much of that now where is is hard to tell if the adult is a parent or a grand parent!. Sorry....IMO always best to have kids early in life, when you have the energy to play with and take care of them and also to ensure that you will be around to see them become independent!

56 with 16 yr old and 11 yr old. My biggest complaint is being mistaken for the younger one's grandmother. I honestly can't imagine having kids any earlier than I did. I do have a lot less energy than I used to, but it's fine for parenting purposes.

Anonymous wrote:My bosses wife who is 61 just did her fourth round of IVF in Crete trying to get pregnant again

That's sick.

My bosses wife who is 61 just did her fourth round of IVF in Crete trying to get pregnant again. She has 2 kids from the process. I cannot imagine what goes threw her and my bosses minds.

I am 50 and have a 13 year old...yikes enough.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't know why we should argue about whether it's better to have kids at a younger or older age. You have them when you have them and that's it. Everyone has their reasons. How about we live and let live?

But, also, I don't get the comments about energy levels. As an older parent my energy level is just fine and I'm feeling great in my 60s. But I know I've been lucky to be healthy and to have the time to work out. Not everyone can.

That's great, and I'm glad to hear it. But I bet even you would admit that your energy level in your '60s is not what it was in your '20s, '30s or even early '40s. That's what a lot of these older moms (and I'm myself) don't realize. They think have a "baby" in their '40s is no big deal, because energy level is high. Mine was, as well. The point is, you can't realize at that point how it is going to drop in future years, due to menopause, injuries and just general aging.

Right, you can't. But I wouldn't make a decision based on some vague idea of what might happen. Because my energy levels have been just fine throughout my adult life. And emotionally I was a better parent as an older parent than I would have been at a younger age. But I didn't have a kid at 38 because of some calculation about my physical and emotional age. It was just the right time.

That's why I said - you have kids when you have kids - for whatever reason. There will always be things you don't anticipate. Stop competing for the claim of "best time to have kids."

Anonymous wrote:Don't know why we should argue about whether it's better to have kids at a younger or older age. You have them when you have them and that's it. Everyone has their reasons. How about we live and let live?

But, also, I don't get the comments about energy levels. As an older parent my energy level is just fine and I'm feeling great in my 60s. But I know I've been lucky to be healthy and to have the time to work out. Not everyone can.

That's great, and I'm glad to hear it. But I bet even you would admit that your energy level in your '60s is not what it was in your '20s, '30s or even early '40s. That's what a lot of these older moms (and I'm myself) don't realize. They think have a "baby" in their '40s is no big deal, because energy level is high. Mine was, as well. The point is, you can't realize at that point how it is going to drop in future years, due to menopause, injuries and just general aging.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

Exactly. There are people who have this lifestyle and more power to them. Doesn't mean I would trade my life for theirs though. Not even for a minute.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

You may be surprised to know that we're close to your age, have two teens still at home and wouldn't want it any other way. We have an off season beach trip planned but we'll be bringing the kids along and enjoying every minute we spend together as a family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

I'm 53 and can't imagine a better life than I have right now with my DH and our two teenagers (and our dog ). Thank you for the well wishes!

Agree! I couldn't imagine wasting my 20s being married and pregnant. That was for drinking and drugs!

+1

And sex with random strangers...I mean, so I've heard.