If you can look past all of the bells + whistles of the actual ceremonious event, and the idea of sharing your home & life w/this person does not excite you then I wouldn't marry this man. Right now.

Trust me, it's much easier to cancel a wedding than endure a painful divorce.

Gauge your feelings closely to avoid heart-ache down the road.
That way you won't have to rely only on 20/20 hindsight.

Good luck.

could you secretly elope so you don't care so much but then give your families the party they want, all while being in on this delicious secret?

I was similar to you OP. I postponed our wedding to take the bar. My now DH planned a surprise wedding on Vegas. I wasn't super excited, as I was still studying, but I knew I wanted to marry him. 15 year later, things are good. Marriage is really hard, but I look at my single friends who will never be parents and I made the right choice. If I waited for the absolute perfect guy, I would still be waiting. We have a great life together, even if I wasn't head over heals on getting married.

Op, just chiming in to say I was you.
I cancelled our wedding and got married in a park with 2 friends as witnesses and a minister we hired.
I love my husband and loved our "day to day", as you put it,
I just didn't love planning a big expensive party with dueling MIL's and didn't want to be the center of attention.
Best decision of my life, married 10 years.

(We lost some deposits, but hasn't sent out invitations or anything)

No. This is a bad sign.

Can you imagine your life without him? How does that make you feel?