Anonymous wrote:I cut my hair very short once. My DH, who was then my BF, told me in no uncertain terms that he did not like short hair on women and did not find it attractive. That was 15 years ago, and I still get upset when I think of the hair stylist who talked me into cutting off my hair.
It's been long ever since.

Tell her.

Anonymous wrote:I am for honesty here, especially since it is not a difficult-to-fix issue like miraculously losing 50 lbs.

My advice to you is to express yourself in terms of missing her long beautiful hair instead of in terms of not liking her short hair.

Say - "Honey, i really miss your long hair! it used to rock my world! Do you think you'll ever bring it back?"

If she gives your resistance at the point, stay mum until you come back on the board for further strategizing lol.

DON'T let it turn into a power struggle because you'll be screwing yourself. However, don't just swallow it either. If you have a healthy marriage, your wife probably wants to be beautiful in your eyes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to leave this alone. Her hair is not your purview. It's hers, not yours. Sorry, bucko.

Good good you are a psycho. Spouses absoulutely give each other feedback into what they like prefer.

Crawl back under your bridge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP did you marry your wife for the person she is or for her hair?

Also, to the One PP accusing the other about making it all about them: you would be surprised how many men attach long hair as some requisite of feminity" and loathe it on their wives, regardless of how good shorter hair may look on them.

Now, OP, here's my two cents: communicate with your wife. Maybe she loves her new shorter hair. As a woman who went from very long hair to a pixie cut and loved it, I'll say this: having short hair can make a woman feel very empowered and stylish. Because *You* don't like it doesn't mean that she doesn't feel fabulous, and before you lodge your opinion /complain, please take some time to explore how she feels. She may be inching shorter because she knows you prefer the longer hair, but SHE likes it shorter.

Also take some time to explore your ow bias. Is it that you prefer the longer hair on her, or that you tie it to femininity, etc.

I don't think men know or appreciate how much a new hairstyle can make a woman feel fabulous.

+1

My husband made "mom hair" cracks, which pissed me off, because I have had a pixie in the past (which he knows; I had short hair when I met him), and I love having short hair. I think it's more flattering on me and it makes me feel chic. And everyone else compliments my hair (even when it would be easy not to say anything). My mom, who would tell me honestly if it didn't look good, thinks it looks great short. But the mom-hair comments are insulting and hurtful and incredibly unlikely to make me want to change my hairstyle.

Anonymous wrote:The divorced mothers I know end up with a lot more free time after divorce then when they were married so they have time to exercise and blow out their hair.

Anonymous wrote:You need to leave this alone. Her hair is not your purview. It's hers, not yours. Sorry, bucko.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I am stepping into a landmine, but here goes:

My DW is a beautiful woman, she is as beautiful to me as the day we met. Lately, she has been coming home from the salon with shorter and shorter hair. To be brutally honest here (since we are anonymous) I don't think it looks good on her in general, and I don't like how she looks with short hair. Part of me thinks I should do the typical "you look great honey!" when she comes back, but then again, if I were doing something that was a turn-off for her that I could fix - like growing a beard she didn't like - I would want her to tell me.

Is it as simple as saying "I love your hair, but I think you look sexier when it is longer?"

OMG I have the same problem with my sister! The very short hair look only looks really great on someone with great cheek bones and neck, like certain actresses. But when you have chubby cheeks and have a little extra weight -- its not a great look. But good luck.

You have this same problem with your sister? Why are you so catty? It's weird that you spend so much energy concerned with your sister's hair...

She is always asking me, telling me how great it looks, and I am a bitch. Happy now?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP did you marry your wife for the person she is or for her hair?

Also, to the One PP accusing the other about making it all about them: you would be surprised how many men attach long hair as some requisite of feminity" and loathe it on their wives, regardless of how good shorter hair may look on them.

Now, OP, here's my two cents: communicate with your wife. Maybe she loves her new shorter hair. As a woman who went from very long hair to a pixie cut and loved it, I'll say this: having short hair can make a woman feel very empowered and stylish. Because *You* don't like it doesn't mean that she doesn't feel fabulous, and before you lodge your opinion /complain, please take some time to explore how she feels. She may be inching shorter because she knows you prefer the longer hair, but SHE likes it shorter.

Also take some time to explore your ow bias. Is it that you prefer the longer hair on her, or that you tie it to femininity, etc.

I don't think men know or appreciate how much a new hairstyle can make a woman feel fabulous.

+1

My husband made "mom hair" cracks, which pissed me off, because I have had a pixie in the past (which he knows; I had short hair when I met him), and I love having short hair. I think it's more flattering on me and it makes me feel chic. And everyone else compliments my hair (even when it would be easy not to say anything). My mom, who would tell me honestly if it didn't look good, thinks it looks great short. But the mom-hair comments are insulting and hurtful and incredibly unlikely to make me want to change my hairstyle.

Anonymous wrote:OP did you marry your wife for the person she is or for her hair?

Also, to the One PP accusing the other about making it all about them: you would be surprised how many men attach long hair as some requisite of feminity" and loathe it on their wives, regardless of how good shorter hair may look on them.

Now, OP, here's my two cents: communicate with your wife. Maybe she loves her new shorter hair. As a woman who went from very long hair to a pixie cut and loved it, I'll say this: having short hair can make a woman feel very empowered and stylish. Because *You* don't like it doesn't mean that she doesn't feel fabulous, and before you lodge your opinion /complain, please take some time to explore how she feels. She may be inching shorter because she knows you prefer the longer hair, but SHE likes it shorter.

Also take some time to explore your ow bias. Is it that you prefer the longer hair on her, or that you tie it to femininity, etc.

I don't think men know or appreciate how much a new hairstyle can make a woman feel fabulous.

Anonymous wrote:You need to leave this alone. Her hair is not your purview. It's hers, not yours. Sorry, bucko.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP did you marry your wife for the person she is or for her hair?

Also, to the One PP accusing the other about making it all about them: you would be surprised how many men attach long hair as some requisite of feminity" and loathe it on their wives, regardless of how good shorter hair may look on them.

Now, OP, here's my two cents: communicate with your wife. Maybe she loves her new shorter hair. As a woman who went from very long hair to a pixie cut and loved it, I'll say this: having short hair can make a woman feel very empowered and stylish. Because *You* don't like it doesn't mean that she doesn't feel fabulous, and before you lodge your opinion /complain, please take some time to explore how she feels. She may be inching shorter because she knows you prefer the longer hair, but SHE likes it shorter.

Also take some time to explore your ow bias. Is it that you prefer the longer hair on her, or that you tie it to femininity, etc.

I don't think men know or appreciate how much a new hairstyle can make a woman feel fabulous.

OP here, I am not sure what you are asking, but I will try to answer. I will love my wife regardless of her hair length. But I find her more sexually attractive with long hair, and I do think it makes her look more beautiful in general. A person is attracted to what they are attracted to, I don't know that I can change that. Sort of like what I said earlier - a long beard could make me feel empowered but if it turned off my wife (even though she would still love me) I should shave it, no?

Lord help me if the sexual attraction in my marriage boils down to a haircut or facial hair.

I agree with the OP here. It's not that spouses should be required to groom themselves as their spouse dictates, but I don't think it's an ideal dynamic for either spouse to have no interest in pleasing the other. If you absolutely only want short hair, okay, sure he could get used to it even if it's not his first choice. But if you prefer short and know he likes long, wouldn't you want to get something in the middle? My husband asks me about how to trim his goatee and I like that I'm his primary audience on that. Obviously it needs to look professional as well, but no harm in taking your spouse's preferences into consideration.